prissy926

My mom takes an awful lot of pain meds. I don't know how much because we don't live too close to each other. It started about 10 or more years ago with her neck, then it was her back, then it was her hand, then it was her foot, then it was her toe. I could go on & on but I think you all get the picture. She has been taking pain meds for all of the above problems for as long as I remember.

I think she gets prescriptions from different doctors and then I just recently found out what I think she does. She told me the doctor hand wrote her a script for some pain meds approx 2 weeks ago. (I don't know which doctor or how many meds). After she left her appt with the hand written script, she called the Dr's office and asked if they could call the script in to the pharmacy so that she wouldn't have to wait for the script to be filled. The Dr's office called in her script............BUT she still has the hand written script in her possession. She then went to a different pharmacy last week and got her original script filled.

I've confronted her about this and she says she needs the meds to help with her pain and the Dr's don't prescribe enough to last. She said to me "Stop worrying about me. I can't get addicted to pain meds because I don't have an addictive personality) Oh please, give me a break.

Not only am I concerned about just how much and how often she takes these pain meds, but also what if she get's caught double filling her scripts? I alwas thought after the pharmacy filled you script with a hand written script, they send it back to the Dr. I don't know where I heard this from, but either way - I don't want her to get in to any type of legal trouble either.

Wascally Wabbit

I am sorry you are going through this. Addiction knows no boundaries. Someone will be along shortly who will give a better answer than I can.
In the mean time, do read the "sticky" notes at the top of this board. They are very helpful and will give you some insight.

Violet Brown

Well, I'm certainly not an expert in the field of addiction or codependency. I'm new here, but I hope this will help you some...

Don't worry about whether your mother gets into legal trouble. That's her problem, not yours. It sounds to me like she's addicted and doesn't believe she has a problem. Well guess what? You can't convince her she has a problem - she has to get to that point herself. You can't make her stop taking the meds either. It's hard not to take on the problems of a loved one, but this addiction is your mother's cross to bear, and you need to take care of yourself.

I'd suggest talking to an addictions counsellor or going to an alanon or naranon meeting to gain more insight into the path you're treading. Addiction is a horrible disease. Good luck.

parentrecovers

hey prissy, nice to meet you. your mom is lucky to have such a caring daughter. please remember this about a loved one's addiction - you didn't cause it, you can't cure it, and you cannot control it.

i have a daughter who struggles with alcohol and cocaine addiction, so i understand how hard it is.

i go to alanon, it really helps me.

blessings, and keep posting - k

hope213

honey, i know you are worried about your mom.i am sorry she is doing this, i really am. i am glad you found us.there is so much to learn here about what the addict does & what it does to those who love them. the first lesson is we r powerless.as sad as it is there is nothing we can do for our addicts.if they want to use then they are going to. the only one you can help is yourself.read all the stickys at the top of the forum.read around all the post. there is alot of loving people here that has been through what you are going through.i hope you find some relief here.keep coming back.let us know how u are doing & your mom too.prayers, hope

racegirl2448

I am a cronic pain patient and have been taking Oxycontin & percocet on and off for a few years....the last year or so I have been on the pills everyday and although I honestly do not think I am an addict in the true meaning of the word... I do feel dependant on these meds to control my pain and I believe there is a difference between addiction/dependance (very fine line though). I will be the first one to tell you that I have been known to take an extra pill here and there but I have never done the issues of ...double filling/dr shopping/ER visits or stealing or what have you. I have run out early but never more than 3-4 days
early except... when Dr is out on vacation and has noone covering as the case this month I was without for about a week.
I am currently (as of few days ago when I got refills) trying to cut down from 3 pills a day to 2 pills a day just to see if my pain will still be under control... I can live with a containt pain level of a 4-5 but the amount of meds I was and am suppossed to be taking had my pain level at a 2 all the time and to be honest it was nice to live 95% pain free.
As far as your mother goes.... with the things you mentioned she is doing I feel she may have a more serious issue...if the amount of pills does not help then she should have at least talked to the Dr and gotten doses adjusted. If she is double filling it will catch up eventually. I know in my state they keep tabs on pharmacy fills/names/Dr names etc so... Dr shopping is picked up on. For example.... I always get my narcotics from the same Dr and fill them at the same pharmacy chain....although I do alternate the locations depending on what errands I need to do and what section of town I am in when I have my scripts in my hand...but it is still the same store chain just differnet sides of town so no issues have happened except a couple mths ago.... my normal pharmacy did not have the generic available and the price difference was $10(generic) & $50(name) so I called around and found that Target had the generic so I called my Dr and let them know that I was filling it at Target not my normal pharmacy....I had signed a contract with the Dr when I first started seeing him that I would only get narcotics from him and fill at same pharmacy chain...and agree to drug testing all that happy stuff to make sure I am taking them and not selling them...covers the Dr butt so I was cool with that... anyways a week after I filled them the Dr's office got a call from either the insurance company or the State(state does keep track too from what I hear) to tell them that I had re-filled at a different place than normal. The Dr's office said that I had informed them I was getting it filled at a different location before actually getting it filled so they were aware of the situation already. I was honest with the DR's office and I am glad I was cuz had I not told them I would have been looked at differently.
Your mother needs to talk to the DR and get doses adjusted or maybe she really does have more of an addiction than she lets on.....

teke

welcome to sr, sorry you're worried about your mom, i agree with hope, there is not much you can do about your mom, the addict in my life is my husband and i do understand how you feel. maybe its time for you to do what you have to do to take care of you and your needs, you can't change what your mom does, thats something that she'll have to do for herself. alanon and naranon will help you to learn to better understand how you help the addict by taking care of you and learning how to better cope with how addiction affects you. i'll keep you and your mom in my prayers.

greeteachday

Welcome, I'm sorry for the reasons you are here but so gla dyou found us. Please read around especially the "stickies" at the top of the page. Unfortunately we can not cure or control addiction in a love one, no matter how much we would like to. It does sound like she has a problem but it does not sound as if she is ready to acknowledge that at this point. Reading and posting here will help you to learn how you can help yourself overcome the pain of loving someone with an addiction.

Doug

Just wanted to say welcome to SR Prissy, we're glad you found us.

rayofsunshine

I wanted to add my welcome! Glad you found us. This is a great place of support
and encouragement. Keep reading and posting and learn all you can about addiction.

thejunkyswife

Good luck to you. I hope you are able to take care of yourself!

Pharmaceutical addictions can be pretty squirrely to deal with. In some ways, I think that pharmaceutical addictions are more like dealing with alcoholics...it's legal, the doctor gives it to them (pharmies)/everybody drinks (alcoholics), it isn't that big a deal, etc.

Not to be alarmist, but my husband's heroin addiction stemmed from his mother's addiction to pharmaceuticals. She got hooked on oxycontin after she was in a wreck, and eventually she and my husband were robbing pharmacies (mom drove the getaway car, my husband held the pharmacists at freakin' gun point) to fulfill their need for the pills. They both ended up in jail...my husband was there for 2 months, and the mom just over night. They're both on probation. My husband switched from oxycontin to heroin IN REHAB because it was easier to get...

Anyway, it's a scary thing...but everyone here is right. You can't make your mom do anything. I think expressing your concern to her is appropriate, as it sounds like she's in some serious denial, and you're at least planting the seed. All you can do is take care of yourself...maybe hit up a Nar-Anon or AL-Anon meeting if you can.

Good luck to you!

rozied

Dear Prissie, I am on this site because my 40 yr old son is an addict. I am answering your post as I too am a chronic pain patient. I am a RN with a BS Degree. When I was 17 I hurt my back fooling around with some friends. I had no pain when it happened but 3 mts later while attending nursing school I started to get pain down the bk of my left leg. The dr at the schol said " Oh thats just sciatica " At 17 what did I know about sciatica. The pain went away until I was 25 & a LPN. I was on a 22 hr car trip to Fl. When I went to get out of the car the pain incapacitated me. I could not move. It felt like someone had slammed a 2000lb anvil into my lower bk. I went to a dr & that was the 1st time I was given pain medication & a muscle relaxor. The pain did go away after a wk on my bk only to return again when I was 8 mts pregnant with my 2nd child. It did eventualy go away. I started college in 74 to get my RN & BS. After the 1st Laminectomy in 76 I went bk to nsg & was fine for 4 yrs. In 78 I got my BSN. Then I got hurt again & had my 2nd laminectomy & went bk to wk. My history is very long. There is alot more but I will get to the point.
All together I have had 8 bk operations including multiple laminectomys, fusions and the last operation was a spinal revision. Along the way I developed Adhesive Arachnoiditis which is an extremely painful disease. A dr has said the pain is comparable to cancer without the relief of an early death. I got this from the dye used in the myelograms I had. Bk in 76 & 80 they used an oil based dye called Pantopaque which the drs are suppossed to remove after the procedure. They never can get it all out as oil & spinal fluid are like separating oil and water. This dsye eats the botom out of a styrofoam cup so imagine what it does to a person spinal nerves. In 85 I had an Ant/Post Fusion with Harrington Rods then spent 3 mts in a body cast. After removal of the cast I was no better. I had them take the rods out hoping that would help the pain.................it did not. All along I had drs that doubted my pain. I believe being a woman had alot to do with it. I have had drs apologize to me after finally doing a myelogram & needing 71/2 hr surgery. Telling me they didn't believe me before the test as I did not fit the text book description!!!
In 1999 I started walking all bent over. It progressed to the point where I was literally bent in half. I had developed what they call Fixed Saggital Imbalance or Flat Back from the rods they put in bk in 85. For quite a few yrs any drs I visted would not properly diagnosis me as the Harrington Rods caused it. I finally diagnosed myself on the net & found the names of drs called Spinal Revisionists. In 2005 I had a Spinal Revision.
Before 1992 when I found my present dr I felt alot like your mother. None of the drs ever gave me enough medication to control my pain for the whole month. An organism will do anything to get out of pain & nerve pain is about the worse pain you can have. If your mothers pain is real and her dr is not giving her enough medication to control it it is no wonder she is doing whatever it takes to get out of pain. Has she talked to her dr about it? Has she ever gone to Pain Management Drs??? Today drs do take pain alot more seriously than they did bk in the 70's & 80's. Don't judge too harshly until you are sure her pain does not have a real physical cause.
Now there is something else you should be aware of. A dr cannot call in heavy duty pain medication. They cannot be called in or refilled. Pain Medication has Classifications, Class I are illegal drugs, Class II are drugs like Percocet & Percodan, Morphine, Oxycontin, Actiq, etc Class III are drugs like Vicodin & Darvocet, Tylenol with Codeine etc. Your mom cannot be on the Class II drugs as they cannot be called in.
I sure hope this helps clarify things for you. As the person above has posted pharmaceutical addictions can be pretty squirrely. You are not in your mom's body & do not know the extent of her pain. I understand your not wanting her to get into trouble. Why don't you talk to her & find out exactely what type of pain she has. Has she been diagnosed with any condition that causes severe pain? Our society has come a long way but still today people with real severe pain do get labeled as addicts when all they are trying to do is get out of pain.
Love,
Diane