Sponsors?
 

Just wondering how many of you are either being sponsored or sponsoring in any 12 step fellowships. I am currently looking for a sponsor at the meetings I atttend. It doesn't seem like people talk about that aspect of recovery in meetings that I have been too much. Bear in mind I have only been in meetings two months. How are your sponsoring experiences going? What does it bring to your recovery?
Thank you,
Promise

Promise,

I found that a lot of people in Alanon/Naranon were unsponsored. I think it's because of the same thing that you've found....you just don't know what to do! Is there a step Alanon/Naranon meeting near you? That would be a great place to seek out a sponsor. I wasn't able to really begin to work a recovery program until I found a sponsor. I read, worked the steps on my own, etc. but nothing was sticking. Having a sponsor was imperative for me. One of the main things that I would do is ask at the meeting if anyone is willing to sponsor....at least willing to act as a temporary sponsor. It just helps to get started. Send your thoughts out to the universe/pray to seek his will and be led to the right person. Bet that you find someone sooner rather than later! It brought accountability and clarity to my recovery.

Good question! Good luck - let me know how it goes for you. Love, Donna

I was incredibly lucky to find a STRONG Alanon meeting right away. There are lots of folks with longterm recovery and lots of folks from both programs... many of the AA folks already have worked a program and understand the value of the steps AND the traditions.

I got a sponsor after about 6 months. I would announce it at meetings, during the announcement section or during the sharing and ask folks who were interested to talk to me after meetings.

I looked for folks with time in the program (in my mind, 5 years seemed like a long time back then), I wanted someone who had already worked all the steps at least once and someone who also had a sponsor herself. In addition, I was hoping to hook up with someone who was a "mom of" rather than a "spouse of"... I just thought we would have more in common.

I got most of what I was looking for, except my sponsor is a "spouse of". She and I set up a "committee" for me to call when I was dealing specifically with "mom of" issues. Except I never call them... I just call her. She has been the perfect sponsor for me.

One thing that the folks around the tables advised me to do was to pray for a sponsor. I thought it was silly ... until it worked.

I wish you the best.

PS - I also agree with attending bood study meetings - you can find some folks there who are more focused on "program" rather than "qualifiers". ((hugs))

hey promise, i have been going to alanon on a regular basis since september. i don't have a sponsor yet, but i am close. i've been coffee chatting with a handful of folks. i work the steps alone, i am on step 3. want a sponsor to get me through 4 and 5. but a sponsor may ask me to start over, so they be part of the whole process. hope this helps, k

Promise,

I'd highly recommend you getting a sponsor. Since you're relatively new in the anon rooms, just sit and listen. You'll find someone who has something you want....peace, serenity, level head while dealing with the disease of addiction. That is what I found in my sponsor. She has over 21 years in Al Anon and wisdom that can only come with that much time. I'm not saying you have to get someone with that much time, but the more time they have in recovery, the more solid their wisdom/recovery will be. That's just my humble opinion.

I tried working the steps by myself but if you really want to get down to the nitty gritty, get yourself a sponsor who can guide you through them. Plus a sponsor shares his/her experience, strength and hope which is always good. I need all of that I can get. And if you read the steps carefully, you'll see they say "WE". That means we don't "do" recovery alone. If I try to do them by myself, who is going to call me on my crap (excuse my french) when I start fudging?

Yep, get yourself a sponsor and start working those steps which I've found are a way to a better life. I am SO glad I did.

Hugs,
Hangin' In

Your suggestions are so helpful. I didn't think of announcing my intention during the meeting announcements, as I am still learning the procedures for things. I will definitely check out some more step study groups! I feel very encouraged now!