Language of Letting Go - April 5
Nature Girl
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Language of Letting Go - April 5
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go
Detaching in Love
Detachment is a key to recovery from codependency. It strengthens our healthy relationships - the ones that we want to grow and flourish. It benefits our difficult relationships - the ones that are teaching us to cope. It helps us!
Detachment is not something we do once. It's a daily behavior in recovery. We learn it when were beginning our recovery from codependency and adult children issues. And we continue to practice it along the way as we grow and change, and as our relationships grow and change.
We learn to let go of people we love, people we like, and those we don't particularly care for. We separate ourselves, and our process, from others and their process.
We relinquish our tight hold and our need to control in our relationships. We take responsibility for ourselves; we allow others to do the same. We detach with the understanding that life is unfolding exactly as it needs to, for others and ourselves. The way life unfolds is good, even when it hurts. And ultimately, we can benefit from even the most difficult situations. We do this with the understanding that a Power greater than ourselves is in charge, and all is well.
Today, I will apply the concept of detachment, to the best of my ability, in my relationships. If I cant let go completely, Ill try to hang on loose.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
Detaching in Love
Detachment is a key to recovery from codependency. It strengthens our healthy relationships - the ones that we want to grow and flourish. It benefits our difficult relationships - the ones that are teaching us to cope. It helps us!
Detachment is not something we do once. It's a daily behavior in recovery. We learn it when were beginning our recovery from codependency and adult children issues. And we continue to practice it along the way as we grow and change, and as our relationships grow and change.
We learn to let go of people we love, people we like, and those we don't particularly care for. We separate ourselves, and our process, from others and their process.
We relinquish our tight hold and our need to control in our relationships. We take responsibility for ourselves; we allow others to do the same. We detach with the understanding that life is unfolding exactly as it needs to, for others and ourselves. The way life unfolds is good, even when it hurts. And ultimately, we can benefit from even the most difficult situations. We do this with the understanding that a Power greater than ourselves is in charge, and all is well.
Today, I will apply the concept of detachment, to the best of my ability, in my relationships. If I cant let go completely, Ill try to hang on loose.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
Nature Girl
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
We take responsibility for ourselves; we allow others to do the same. We detach with the understanding that life is unfolding exactly as it needs to, for others and ourselves. The way life unfolds is good, even when it hurts. And ultimately, we can benefit from even the most difficult situations. We do this with the understanding that a Power greater than ourselves is in charge, and all is well.
As I worked my recovery and opened my mind and my spirit, I recognized that even the painful times are part of the journey, an experience along the way to teach me lessons that would light my path in the future. The pain taught me that something was wrong, just like a painful ankle might be broken. Pain told me that something needed to change or I would get sicker and sicker. Pain was one of God's strangely wrapped gifts that led me to a better place.
When I learned to let go and let God run the universe, when I stopped standing in front of runaway trains of addiction, and when I learned to allow my son his God-given right to learn his own lessons on his journey....that was when I could heal and the pain would stop.
Detaching doesn't mean I don't love my son, it means that I love him enough to place his care in God's hands and trust that "life is happening just the way it is supposed to". I believe that today, as crazy as it sounds.
Hugs
IO Storm
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Southern California
Posts: 18,436
Thanks Ann.
A wise forum leader kind of got this message to me early
yesterday morning when I was frantically trying to help
a newcomer and felt powerless and inadequate to help.
I had already turned it over when I had a twilight dream of
an angel comforting that person later on while going to
sleep. Little did I know I was being prepared for a strong
lesson in letting go.
A family member I have asking for prayer for here on SR
showed up here at home late this evening..... drunk.
Immediately my arms went around her, and the coffee pot
came on.
I let her talk, laugh, cry,....
You see, we both share the same disease.
It is only by the grace of God I am now on the other side.
Others are helping her, I am too close.
She sayed until she could drive.
Throughout the visit, I kept saying, even to her, I'm not
touching that, I'm too close.
A strange peace was with me through the whole 3 hours,
and now.
You see, when I got the news her disease had taken a
voracious turn for the worse, I was so strongly impressed
that I was not the one. I was one to pray, and to surrender
her into God's all knowing all wise, all loving, and all
capable hands.
Letting go again, God, and watch her thru the long night.
We do this with the understanding that a Power greater than ourselves is in charge, and all is well.
Love,
A wise forum leader kind of got this message to me early
yesterday morning when I was frantically trying to help
a newcomer and felt powerless and inadequate to help.
I had already turned it over when I had a twilight dream of
an angel comforting that person later on while going to
sleep. Little did I know I was being prepared for a strong
lesson in letting go.
A family member I have asking for prayer for here on SR
showed up here at home late this evening..... drunk.
Immediately my arms went around her, and the coffee pot
came on.
I let her talk, laugh, cry,....
You see, we both share the same disease.
It is only by the grace of God I am now on the other side.
Others are helping her, I am too close.
She sayed until she could drive.
Throughout the visit, I kept saying, even to her, I'm not
touching that, I'm too close.
A strange peace was with me through the whole 3 hours,
and now.
You see, when I got the news her disease had taken a
voracious turn for the worse, I was so strongly impressed
that I was not the one. I was one to pray, and to surrender
her into God's all knowing all wise, all loving, and all
capable hands.
Letting go again, God, and watch her thru the long night.
We do this with the understanding that a Power greater than ourselves is in charge, and all is well.
Love,
grateful rca
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: atlanta, ga.
Posts: 4,671
for me this is the most beautiful time of all, when you learn that its ok to let go and let god handle situations in life for you. learning to let go has brought me so much peace and it has also brought about a change in my situation. i wanted change in my life so desperately, but i found out that it was me who needed to change, my hp want me to move out the way, so that he could get to my husband and my kids.
th think about how much i've prayed for so long, and all i had to do was let go, turn it over, and just be. thank you ann
i know that this may not make much sense right now, but what i feel does maybe i just don't quite know the right words.
th think about how much i've prayed for so long, and all i had to do was let go, turn it over, and just be. thank you ann
i know that this may not make much sense right now, but what i feel does maybe i just don't quite know the right words.
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