patchoulli

a very nice friend asked me if I wanted to go boating with him on saturday...Nice, good looking, but chronic pain from failed back surgery. I don't wanna ask" what meds are you on,? how often do you take them,? do you abuse them,"? I am not bitter against men, I am worried about even being friends with someone that has chronic pain and the mood swings/addiction issues that go with it....HELP.....I want to start living my life, but i'm hoping I learned something from the horror I have been thru.

itiswhatitis...

i'd go with no expectations other than enjoying a day on a boat - who knows??????

in time - if it goes anywhere - you would find out - i say enjoy a day...

love,
s

rose

I agree to go with no expectations, but are you in safe hands...

Rose

patchoulli

i don't know...I have no expectations, he doesn't ride a motorcycle...but the chronic pain thing brings back Keiths issues...I don't think I can deal with even a whiff of anything that smells like more than an occasional tylenol...Yup I am definitely paranoid....

bookmiser

(((((Patch)))))

If this friend knows your situation, then he knows what you were up against.
He would respect the fact that you are planning ahead for your future and if he wants to be a part of that, friend/more, than he would willingly offer the scoop.
Me? I'd definitely ask for the 411 on his situation.
Laugh about it and kiddingly ask,
"Hey! So what's up with your disability? Are you medicated?"

As a friend, I think he'll understand. Or you could just go ahead with the day, enjoy it, and leave it at that. If your looking for more, though, I'd look for answers.
Or, hey! You could pull one of these bad boys out, and go, "welcome to Investigation Station, I'm your host, Patchoulli. Sit back and spill your guts.


Just kidding, sweetie. You know how far to go, when to stop it, and when to haul a$$. Just have fun. You deserve it.
Hugs,

teke

i'm like you, with all the stuff you've already been through, i think that i might be a little paranoid too, though you can't judge according to your past experience. i agree with the others, you know what you want and what you don't want, you kind of know what kind of meds that you are not comfortable with. maybe you could just ask"what are you taking for pain". go from there. have fun, for right now, its only a date, huh?

outonalimb

I don't think you're paranoid...maybe just hyper-vigilant about drugs? I don't blame you one bit. When I get the nerve to go 'back out there'...My drug radar will be finely tuned and the slightest addiction bleep is going to send me running.

Just go Patch...and have fun...and keep your eyes and ears open. Trust yourself enough to know that you will just know if there is a problem lurking.

Have fun...