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Ex-ABF won't quit

Old 04-06-2007, 11:04 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
survivor
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: florida usa
Posts: 25
No contact. Of course, with children, it's a little harder. My ex ah cannot see the children right now (court ordered), until he passes a hair-folicle test. I have not discouraged phone contact with the kids, but now he always asks them to put me on the phone. It starts out simple, then goes to how ridiculous I am for not letting him see the kids. Pass a drug test, plain and simple...We still go through this about once a month. I hate putting the kids in a position to say "Mommy can't come to the phone", especially when he persists with them. But for my own sanity...it's just bad all around.

When I do talk to him, he asks why I make him feel so bad. I remind him that I didn't ask to speak with him. He calls drunk or high, lying still all the time, asking for money, telling me how "lucky" I am.

Just leave me alone!

Trying in Texas, it's hard. But it's better than the alternative...letting them make you even more nuts.
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Old 04-07-2007, 12:15 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: BFE
Posts: 115
Right?

It is getting really sad. I wish he would just leave me alone. I'm afraid he's going to make it incredibly hard to move on - but at this point, I figure just letting him text or whatever and not responding will at least be the test of whether or not he is sane - and next time he shows up at my house, I'm going to get real and either not answer the door at all or open it and tell him immediately that he has to leave. Then if he crosses that line, there's no "blurry" grey area... it's black-and-white unwanted. At that point, I might not have such a problem with the alternatives... which, right now, are to tell my dad, tell his parents (really don't want to do this, but they don't even probably know we are broken up!) or... gosh, I hope this doesn't happen - call the cops.

I am really nervous because tomorrow I am having some people over for my b-day, and I don't want him to crash it. I'm so scared that he will. But I hope my sister will take care of it for me so I don't have to.
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Old 04-07-2007, 12:53 AM
  # 23 (permalink)  
survivor
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: florida usa
Posts: 25
Change your phone number and DEFINITELY CALL THE COPS! Set your boundaries!

And, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!
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Old 04-07-2007, 03:17 AM
  # 24 (permalink)  
grateful rca
 
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: atlanta, ga.
Posts: 4,671
Originally Posted by Mavis View Post
I WISH there were no contact... that would help my recovery sooo much. But what if you have children together?

no contact until you are ready and can handle it, is what i say, i have 7 kids. i had to look out for me first. i figure the kids are ok if i'm ok.

sorry trying in just wanted to respond to mavis

i think you are doing good and i'm still praying for ya
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Old 04-07-2007, 03:08 PM
  # 25 (permalink)  
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Join Date: Oct 2006
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Definitely today has made me see that I don't have any desire to talk to him or have him in my life anymore.
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