just an update
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: reality
Posts: 156
just an update
In one way I hate posting when things are going well, it almost feel like a jinx. I sit here and write about steps forward, and almost instantly things go backwards.
BUT BUT,
well, abf has been looking for a job all week, sober all week. I can tell there has been some sort of shift in him, something that just hasn't been there before. Not enough to carry him through the worst, since he was out drinking again yesterday, but some sort of deeper awareness, deeper commitment. He just has to take the idea of slips seriously and make a plan of how to deal with it when he starts to want to go drink.
No coke for 7 weeks now. Believe it or not, about two weeks ago he actually went to the crack house, bought something, decided not to use and walked out. I know, you guys probably figure he is lying to me about that when he told me, but honestly, the fact that he was only there an hour leads me to believe him, he has NEVER stayed in a crack house for less than 8 hours. He said he stood there and thought "I have stayed clean for over 5 weeks, I don't want to put this in my body."
I just wish he could stop the drinking. He doesn't drink much but, once he walks through he bar's doors, you just don't know what will happen. He might spend 200 bucks drinking half the night and buying rounds, he might just have a couple beers and a cheeseburger. but one thing is for sure -- he never went to do drugs without drinking first, and all sorts of crappy things happen when he is drunk, like he gets mugged, or caught driving, or any stupid thing you can think of. and nothing like that ever happens when he is sober--sober he doesn't do stupid stuff or get himself into vulnerable situations.
I have decided to focus on the positive, his job searching, his overall commitment to sobriety, his respect for my no-alcohol around me boundary. It seems like in this situation you have to be thankful for the small steps forward.
BUT BUT,
well, abf has been looking for a job all week, sober all week. I can tell there has been some sort of shift in him, something that just hasn't been there before. Not enough to carry him through the worst, since he was out drinking again yesterday, but some sort of deeper awareness, deeper commitment. He just has to take the idea of slips seriously and make a plan of how to deal with it when he starts to want to go drink.
No coke for 7 weeks now. Believe it or not, about two weeks ago he actually went to the crack house, bought something, decided not to use and walked out. I know, you guys probably figure he is lying to me about that when he told me, but honestly, the fact that he was only there an hour leads me to believe him, he has NEVER stayed in a crack house for less than 8 hours. He said he stood there and thought "I have stayed clean for over 5 weeks, I don't want to put this in my body."
I just wish he could stop the drinking. He doesn't drink much but, once he walks through he bar's doors, you just don't know what will happen. He might spend 200 bucks drinking half the night and buying rounds, he might just have a couple beers and a cheeseburger. but one thing is for sure -- he never went to do drugs without drinking first, and all sorts of crappy things happen when he is drunk, like he gets mugged, or caught driving, or any stupid thing you can think of. and nothing like that ever happens when he is sober--sober he doesn't do stupid stuff or get himself into vulnerable situations.
I have decided to focus on the positive, his job searching, his overall commitment to sobriety, his respect for my no-alcohol around me boundary. It seems like in this situation you have to be thankful for the small steps forward.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: twilight zone,usa
Posts: 3,909
glad things are going good for you, stay postive.i hope he quits drinking.alcohol is a drug & it does lead back to there drug of choice but today he is not using crack.that is a good thing.hugs,hope
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