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-   -   Not strong at all (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/friends-family-substance-abusers/119786-not-strong-all.html)

notsleepingwell 03-31-2007 05:22 AM

Not strong at all
 
Got a call this morning at 6am....supposed to go bail her out. I know she's getting sick already. This is sooooo hard. I can't stand to see her suffer. How safe is she really in jail?! I'm already picturing her curling up into a ball, vomiting, diarrhea, hurting bad.

Gotta run to the jail , supposed to be there at 9am, I'll pick her up if they released her, but will not sign anything to guarentee she'll show up for court, as she disappears and I don't know how to find her.

Please, I know you guys are praying for me, but still need em!!!

Thanks

greeteachday 03-31-2007 05:33 AM

Prayers continue...I'm sorry...this is really, really hard. I pray that if they will lbail her she will go right to detox and rehab. Hugs

marle 03-31-2007 05:49 AM

Are you dropping her off at a detox and rehab or is she going back on the streets. A lot of addicts say that it is the memory of being in withdrawals that have helped keep them in recovery. Hopefully she will choose to get help. Hugs, Marle

pjbs55 03-31-2007 05:53 AM

NSW
I will continue to pray for all of you. My biggest prayer right now is that she will want to go to rehab, and this has taught her a lesson. Do what you have to for you.
Hugs coming to you

Hurtbad2505 03-31-2007 05:53 AM

Hopefully you can take her straight to rehab from jail...I know from experience that if they are sick and get the chance...they WILL use. I'm so sorry you are going through this, I know how it feels...remember picking my AS from jail...hearing the whole way home how he was done with the lifestyle and then seeing him walk out the door to hook up with one of his user friends.

Still praying for you..please let us know how you are doing...

teke 03-31-2007 06:39 AM

i totally agree with the others, i pray that you are dropping her off at rehab, you can bring her bags after she gets in. sometimes as soon as an addict get a little rest, their next stop will be right back to the dope man's. its here choice though, you can not stop her, and its not fair to you to pay your money to bail her out just to see her walk out the door to start over. sorry i'll keep all of you in my prayers.

now maybe you can put the focus back on you, maybe hit a couple more meetings and turn her over to your hp, and let him do the rest. i pray that she is ready, and that she has learned that jail is where she will end up unless she does something to save her own life.

havehope 03-31-2007 07:00 AM

I'm sorry this is so hard for you. I pray this is her turning point and she will want to get help. Stay strong, you are doing the right thing.
HUGS

notsleepingwell 03-31-2007 07:09 AM

well, didn't post bond for her, so they are going to keep her until someone can...and I can't imagine who would have the money to do that. Her boyfriend cannot because he can't show his face, not to mention he doesn't even know where she is.

The legal aid attorney said they may keep her for 6 mos until the court date comes up....please, please, let this be the right thing for her. I just hope she doesn't die from the withdrawals.

gotta go to work

teke 03-31-2007 07:13 AM

sorry notsleepyingwell

they do have medical staff on board, i think, don't you?

marle 03-31-2007 07:15 AM

The jail is probably used to dealing with the withdrawals. Not posting bond was a good thing. 6 months may seem like a long time, but at least she is in a safe place, no hooking, no using, no taking the chances she took on the street. She has time to contemplate where she wants her life to go. I know this is hard and is not what you wanted for her. Stay focused on you and your grandson. Let her deal with her stuff. It is even okay if you don't feel like taking the jail house calls. You know they will be coming. I am praying really hard for her and for you. Hugs, Marle

hope213 03-31-2007 07:15 AM

it hurts so bad when it is your child.i will say a prayer for her & you.you ask how safe it is in jail.i my opinion it is way safer in jail than them being on the streets using.they do alot of harm to themselves using.keep in mind this could be her bottom,this could possibly save her life. i am sorry for her & you.please take care of yourself.prayers,hope

kj0975 03-31-2007 07:25 AM

My friend who is a heroin addict and went to jail said that during the withdrawls your is a seperate area of the jail where they monitor the person withdrawling. Then after about a week or so when they are done they go to general population. I think this is the best thing for her. She will be sick for 4-5 days but after that she will feel alot better and maybe this is what she needed to get clean. They also have meetings in jail recovery meetings. My sister goes to them once a week. 6 mos is a long time to really focus on recovery and figure out what she needs to do to stay sober. Good for u on not bailing her out if she is dope sick the first thing she would do is use to make herself not sick. Heroin w/d only lasts 3-4 days. Stay strong.

outonalimb 03-31-2007 07:26 AM

(((((NSW)))))

You are doing the right thing...as hard as it is.
You are doing the most loving thing you could do for her. Now she has a chance to clean her system of drugs...This is a blessing...it really is. But I know your mother's heart just aches. Wish I could take that ache away for you...but since I can't...I'm offering prayers that this experience makes you both stronger.

Much love..
and many, many prayers coming your way.

havehope 03-31-2007 07:30 AM

Sending angels to surround your daughter and keep her safe. Again, I pray that this is her turning point.
Terri

Here_I_Am 03-31-2007 08:07 AM

(((nsw)))
 
You are, and have been my hero throughout this whole time. I'm sending prayers of strength, comfort and peace to you, your daughter and your grandson!!

Hang in there NSW!!!
Here_I_Am
(((NSW))) (((NSW's Daughter))) (((NSW's Grandson)))

deedee 03-31-2007 09:03 AM

(((NSW)))

I truly believe your daughter is safer in jail than where she was. My son withdrew from heroin while in jail and the only thing that kept me from bailing him out was knowing how much worse I would feel if he was back out on the streets. Please try to remember that this is her path, and her choices and consequences that led her here. I know how hard this is, and I'm sending huge hugs and prayers for your strength and peace of mind.

with love ~

deedee

Done_With_It 03-31-2007 09:22 AM

I agree jail is probaby the best place for her to be in detox, esp. if she's not quite ready yet. Even if she did go to rehab those withdrawels get ya, and from what I've heard heroin (that's what she's on?) is one of the worst..
Odds of her leaving to get more were good.
I remember my meth withdrawels and don't ever want to go through that again, it's one of the reasons I won't do it again.
She's miserable right now, withdrawels won't kill you, using will. The streets will kill you, jails rarely do, they usually just make you shape up.
Someone's watching over her...
This is all a good thing. She's in a locked up place, she can't hurt herself anymore for now, no one can hurt her, she's has a pillow and a bed, sheets, a blanket, and food when she's ready, and medical care if she needs it.
AND... you know where she is....
That's a lot more than yesterday!~~ ;-)

BigSis 03-31-2007 09:24 AM

NSW (((Hugs))) The jail absolutely does NOT want her to die in their custody. If not for humane reasons (and some of my good friends work in our local jail... and ARE compassionate, caring women); then for selfish reasons! They don't want the negative publicity, the problems it causes among the population, the impact on the jailers or the administrative costs involved in reporting and dealing with something like that.

In other words, the institution has lots of very good reasons to take care of your daughter... not as good of care as she might get in a private pay hospital... but good care.

My prayers are that she gets EXACTLY what she needs, that HP walks with her the entire way and that He brings YOU the comfort and warmth and peace you desire.

(((NSW)))

rose 03-31-2007 09:59 AM

You have given her the biggest gift, what she chooses to do with it is up to her. I truly believe had she got out she would have run for a fix. She is in the safest place she could be right now, she is safe from herself. Going to rehab and not wanting to be there she could just turn around and leave.

From my own experience with my husband going to jail, they do have medical help and should someone become to sick they have them escorted to the hospital until they well enough to go back. The jails have programs running all the time, she is not the first addict to be put in jail, they know what to do.

I was so terrified in the beginning of this mess that my husband would go to jail, well he did end up there served his time and out he came...then I prayed he get put back in.

Maybe rest your mind a bit and give the jail a call with your concerns and worries.

You did the right thing!

Rose


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