Getting Sober
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: FL
Posts: 16
Originally Posted by denny57
I'm sorry to hear you are going through this, caracal. Especially with the calls to the center. Are you calling an AA center? I've never heard of such a thing - that they would not call you back regarding a ride. They need new staff!
What are you hoping will happen for him at the meetings? Heck, what is he hoping? You say he is not capable of doing anything for himself right now. What happened after the meeting? Is he going back?
I know you are under a lot of stress right now; I hope you find some of that time to tend to your own needs.
Take care.
What are you hoping will happen for him at the meetings? Heck, what is he hoping? You say he is not capable of doing anything for himself right now. What happened after the meeting? Is he going back?
I know you are under a lot of stress right now; I hope you find some of that time to tend to your own needs.
Take care.
I am hoping that at the meetings he will realize that he is not alone, that there is help and support for those who choose to seek it. He feels good after going to the meetings, and he is going back to more. This is all I can hope for is that he gets help and stops drinking.
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: FL
Posts: 16
Originally Posted by elizabeth1979
Caracal,
My issue is not that you shouldnt drop him off at a meeting.
My issue is that I dont recall you mentioning him asking you to.
If my ex had asked me, I would have taken him.
He didnt ask, I was trying to make him go, make him get sober, make him stop being an alcoholic.
By the way, after 4 days, he should be feeling much better. Or is he still drinking?
Let me say..to say that he is not capable of anything by himself is an interesting statement.
I used to say that. I said it to justify my control and being the sobriety ring leader. There were some times that my ex detoxed, and I went to work anyway. Babying them doesnt help. If he is really that sick from detox, than he should go to a hospital.
My issue is not that you shouldnt drop him off at a meeting.
My issue is that I dont recall you mentioning him asking you to.
If my ex had asked me, I would have taken him.
He didnt ask, I was trying to make him go, make him get sober, make him stop being an alcoholic.
By the way, after 4 days, he should be feeling much better. Or is he still drinking?
Let me say..to say that he is not capable of anything by himself is an interesting statement.
I used to say that. I said it to justify my control and being the sobriety ring leader. There were some times that my ex detoxed, and I went to work anyway. Babying them doesnt help. If he is really that sick from detox, than he should go to a hospital.
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: FL
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Originally Posted by pmaslan
Still confused....Does he want to go to the meeting?
Did he injure his dialing finger.......Can't imagine you have
all this extra time with small children to tend to.
Did he injure his dialing finger.......Can't imagine you have
all this extra time with small children to tend to.
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Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 5,075
Originally Posted by caracal
I am hoping that at the meetings he will realize that he is not alone, that there is help and support for those who choose to seek it. He feels good after going to the meetings, and he is going back to more. This is all I can hope for is that he gets help and stops drinking.
Caracal - there may be people at the meeting you go to for yourself who complain about your children. Just because people go to Al-Anon doesn't make them saints, LOL, they are who they are. The majority of people in all my meetings would never turn someone away who really needed to be there. In fact, some old timers offer to sit with the children if need be. Try not to concentrate on those who have a problem with it. If you're comfortable doing so, address it at the meeting. I've heard people say "I really need these meetings but no one can watch my kids."
I hope it all works out.
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: FL
Posts: 16
You can read back to my first post on 7-19-06 can can one help if you need to know more. But I am seeking help for myself and my children and soon he will be on his own dealing with the problem, we will not be moving with him outta state. So he needs to sober up now or never.
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Join Date: Jul 2006
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Originally Posted by denny57
How did last night's meeting go?
Caracal - there may be people at the meeting you go to for yourself who complain about your children. Just because people go to Al-Anon doesn't make them saints, LOL, they are who they are. The majority of people in all my meetings would never turn someone away who really needed to be there. In fact, some old timers offer to sit with the children if need be. Try not to concentrate on those who have a problem with it. If you're comfortable doing so, address it at the meeting. I've heard people say "I really need these meetings but no one can watch my kids."
I hope it all works out.
Caracal - there may be people at the meeting you go to for yourself who complain about your children. Just because people go to Al-Anon doesn't make them saints, LOL, they are who they are. The majority of people in all my meetings would never turn someone away who really needed to be there. In fact, some old timers offer to sit with the children if need be. Try not to concentrate on those who have a problem with it. If you're comfortable doing so, address it at the meeting. I've heard people say "I really need these meetings but no one can watch my kids."
I hope it all works out.
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 2,333
The idea that you want to drive him becasue he has a DUI I get....
but I don't think AA likes it's members to attend drunk or if they
have been drinking...kind of defeats the purpose I would think
but I don't think AA likes it's members to attend drunk or if they
have been drinking...kind of defeats the purpose I would think
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Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Sussex, NJ
Posts: 1,331
Originally Posted by pmaslan
The idea that you want to drive him becasue he has a DUI I get....
but I don't think AA likes it's members to attend drunk or if they
have been drinking...kind of defeats the purpose I would think
but I don't think AA likes it's members to attend drunk or if they
have been drinking...kind of defeats the purpose I would think
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Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Sussex, NJ
Posts: 1,331
Not all meetings are the same Patty, these are only the ones I'm familiar with. Drunks are pretty tolerant of other drunks, or at least that's what I've been told. The thinking is basically if the person is sitting there listening, hopefully something will get through and make an impression, eventually.
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Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Sussex, NJ
Posts: 1,331
I guess people that are court ordered to go, or given the ultimatum by a spouse or sadly, even required by the High School or Middle School. Jay tells me it's not uncommon to see someone drunk at a meeting every now and then.
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Starting over all over again
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Originally Posted by jackson123
He's still drinking? What happens if you go to a meeting drunk? Seems like a bad idea. He needs a sponser that is closer.
The only requirement for membership in AA is a desire to stop drinking. If he shows up drunk and remains quiet most meetings will just let him sit in a corner. If he gets beligerent then he will be gently removed. If he is unable to drive for whatever reason then _he_ can call the AA office in the phone book and see if they will give him a ride to a meeting. Most offices will have someone to give rides. But _he_ has to call. If you call you will get passed over to an Al-anon who will invite _you_ to a meeting
Mike
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