Can you help me understand? (long)
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Can you help me understand? (long)
My dad was a recovering alcoholic when he died three years ago. He had been sober for 8yrs at that time. My mom has a history of mental illness.
In my childhood, it was mom who was always "losing it." I was never exposed to Dad in his out & out drunken stupors. When I was at home he was a social drinker. I & other siblings married and/or left home. My sister, who is 9yrs younger than me, was left with the situationwhich, in Dad's case, escalated. She was a teenager and went through a lot, much of which I can never know.
When Dad came out of the "recovery" place, he spoke to me about being an adult child of an alcoholic. But, and I will not debate about this, I had found Jesus and new I would be alright. I told him this and he understood. I am still walking with the Lord and nothing has come forth of what we talked about that day.
My mother refused to return to al-anon when she was told that she had enabled Dad in his illness. (I understand that issue.) At the time, my sister wouldn't go at all. I have watched her over the years falling apart and yesterday she came to terms with all of it and today all she can do is cry. She had talked to her GYN all this time and he finally put 2 & 2 together and has aranged counciling for her. He has also suggested she attend Al-Anon. How can I help her? Is there anything I can do?
(DH just came in, need to get dinner on the table, will return later to finish)
In my childhood, it was mom who was always "losing it." I was never exposed to Dad in his out & out drunken stupors. When I was at home he was a social drinker. I & other siblings married and/or left home. My sister, who is 9yrs younger than me, was left with the situationwhich, in Dad's case, escalated. She was a teenager and went through a lot, much of which I can never know.
When Dad came out of the "recovery" place, he spoke to me about being an adult child of an alcoholic. But, and I will not debate about this, I had found Jesus and new I would be alright. I told him this and he understood. I am still walking with the Lord and nothing has come forth of what we talked about that day.
My mother refused to return to al-anon when she was told that she had enabled Dad in his illness. (I understand that issue.) At the time, my sister wouldn't go at all. I have watched her over the years falling apart and yesterday she came to terms with all of it and today all she can do is cry. She had talked to her GYN all this time and he finally put 2 & 2 together and has aranged counciling for her. He has also suggested she attend Al-Anon. How can I help her? Is there anything I can do?
(DH just came in, need to get dinner on the table, will return later to finish)
Member
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Bristol TN/VA
Posts: 12,431
HI, welcome!
There are alot of wise and wonderful people here and I am sure that they will be along to welcome you...
this is out of my area of experience, all that comes to mind is that you might offer to babysit if she needs that while she goes to meetings.
Seems that is a complication for some of the ladies here.
Good luck!
live
There are alot of wise and wonderful people here and I am sure that they will be along to welcome you...
this is out of my area of experience, all that comes to mind is that you might offer to babysit if she needs that while she goes to meetings.
Seems that is a complication for some of the ladies here.
Good luck!
live
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Birdie
I want to welcome you too and think it is wonderful that you are supportive of your sister.
Al-Anon is a spiritual fellowship, and she will find wonderful people there who can guide her through the steps and help her recover from her issues. If she is shy about going, maybe you could go to a meeting with her. I know that many people in my fellowship came initially with someone else, a friend or family member, which helped ease their shyness and helped the other person understand their program.
My prayers go out to both of you, and your dad.
I want to welcome you too and think it is wonderful that you are supportive of your sister.
Al-Anon is a spiritual fellowship, and she will find wonderful people there who can guide her through the steps and help her recover from her issues. If she is shy about going, maybe you could go to a meeting with her. I know that many people in my fellowship came initially with someone else, a friend or family member, which helped ease their shyness and helped the other person understand their program.
My prayers go out to both of you, and your dad.
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