teke

hi goal.

welcome. i am so sorry that you have to be here but glad that you are, your story sounds a lot like mine only my ah's drinking have grown into full fledge crack addition, again and again. for me, there is no middle ground. i too am a recovering addict.

my hp has used sr to help keep me sane and i am grateful for that. it sounds as if you are already holding up the fort, so was i. i think that you will be just fine. they told me to keep coming back, reading and posting and today even though my situation has not changed much, i believe that i have,

my kids grew up in this and now most of them are grown and gone and i can see how they have been affected and it is not always pretty. i know that they are okay, but i say to you, you sound so good by making the decision to not allow your son to grow up in this. i suggest that you take heed and focus on taking care of you and your son. i just maybe time for your ah to start taking care of himself.

mallowcup

Glad you are here. I must tell you that I'm afraid we all understand perfectly. The good news is that you have found this place. I think we can distract ourselves with just about anything, including our parents sickness and death. The day just comes, sometimes without warning , when you just look at the cold hard truth. You wonder how the heck did you wind up here? You were just like most of your friends who just wanted to get married, live a simple life and have a nice family. For no particular reason, it's like the cards got thrown in the air and yours landed upside down. That's because it wasn't you, it was something else. Alcohol. I now wretch at the sight or smell of it. You have taken a huge step, maybe without realizing it. You are looking it square in the face. It is a process that begins with that square look. Welcome!

StandingStrong

While you probably do feel alone right now, especially as you said that you and your husband don't have a lot of close friends, you will find that many (if not most) of us can really get a feel for how you are feeling right now.

I have found that for me, it takes a whole lot of "Getting completely honest with myself" as well as answering some really hard questions, that has helped me the most. I think that I lived in a state of denial for so long that it took awhile for me to recognize just what my feelings were as well as find out why I chose to accept the unacceptable. Having come to that point of getting to know ME, I've come to be more accepting of myself and that has really helped me in my own journey.

There are many good books out there to read as well as lots of valuable posts and links throughout this website. Education on alcoholism and codependancy helped me a great deal.

Welcome to SR and I hope that you'll stay.

Rhon15

I understand. I am in simular sistuation. I am starting to understand I need to make a choice. To deal with the problem or leave it. It's hard to decide. My husband just starting drinking again last week. I am too feeling the impending doom ahead. But we have a choice. We just need to find it in ourselves what is going to be and act on it. My prayers are with you and your family.