MySecret

Please help my husband started his dettox this monday, he was very pleased to get onto the program as was so fed up with drink ruling his life, anyway hes done an outpatient dettox, he has been very quiet with me since about wednesday and said he didnt want any money during the whole week on the sunday vefore he started the porgramme, however on wedneday he said he would like a little just to buy papers,coffee etc, I mean I cant say no you cant I have to trust right, so anyway my mum went past our house and threw somehting in ther rubbish and found a vodka bottle wedged down the rubbish?!!? I mean we have no proof its from this week only that the rubbish is collected on thusday and its now sunday, mum said maybe its an old bottle he found...mmmm anywya do I keep stum about it to him?

If he has drunk will this affect the dettox, could he get thrown of the programme, is there anyway they will find out, he goes back next wednesday? is he likely to just start drinking again? he was drinking a half bottle of vodka a day and a bottle of wine. please can you give me advise on how to approch this or not approach this? thanks

pmaslan

I wouldn't say anything this is his recovery. If he did drink then he isn't
serious about it in my opinion. My ex had to give urine samples once a
week at his meetings they were random so he had no idea as to what day
they would be collected. I don't know if the facility where your H is going
does this procedure of not, however if they do he will be found out if
he is actually drinking...good luck to you and I hope you are doing
something for you......

Kellye C

I agree, don't say anything at this point. Just keep your eyes open. IF he started drinking again it won't be long before you know about it. There is always the possibility that it is an old bottle. This is so embarassing to admit but when I got sober I had someone help me collect all the old, hidden bottles and they filled a garbage sack. Even so, for the first month or so, other ones I had forgotten about or had hidden during a black-out would appear. I would be filled with terror worried that everyone would think it was a new one and I was back to my drinking.

Anyways, leave it be, the truth will come out. Also, you don't want him thinking that you're sneaking around checking up on him and waiting for him to fail (I understand how you found the bottle - I also understand how an A would twist this which is why I stated it this way).

Bottom line, this is HIS recovery and he can either choose to work it - or not. He will suffer the fruits of his labors or the consequences of his choices. The people in de-tox are not stupid and they're very familiar with how sneaky we A's can be so that's another way the truth will come out - if he is drinking.

Good luck and try to let go of this. Work on you right now and let him handle this (or not handle it - they are both his choice).

Hugs,
Kellye

Missy

"Let Go and Let God!"