imherenow

Im currently working the 12 steps with a f2f sponsor. How have you worked the steps? what readings have you done? journaling? how often do you get together with your sponsor to go over your step 4? or do you need to setup 1 meeting to do it all at once? ive been doing bit by bit

denny57

I think it's different for everyone. Sponsors all work this a different way, too. I had started on my 4th, but stopped as I'm still in a cycle on 1-3. I still journal, using the blueprint as a guide. I do a lot of reading. I have talks with my sponsor, either by phone or get togethers outside of meetings. She gives me things to think about or journal about, but she rarely, if ever, wants to see what I write. One of the reasons I chose her as my sponsor is she does not do the 4th step the way a lot of other people do; i.e., she doesn't necessarily want to be the one I tell the 4th step to. In fact, I use my therapist for that.

There are no rules, or a right way, to "do" Al-Anon. You can do the steps in order, you can do them out of order, you cannot do them at all if it doesn't feel right yet. It took me many months to realize for my own recovery I needed to get the 1st three. However long that takes is fine with me.

Good luck as you progress. I'd love to hear how you go about working them.

Minx1969

I'm on my second set of Twelve Steps for my second year.

In my neck of the woods, I call my sponsor on a designated call time every week...I also call her as needed to talk about stuff and other Alanons as well.

We read the Alanon and AA Twelve and Twelve before we do our Step work. Read the chapters and do some writing.

For my first 4th step (i'm currently working on my second) - I did a lot of writing and read it to my sponsor..took a good 3 hours or so...

Although you can do the steps out of order - I would personally recommend starting with Step 1, Step 2 etc..you really don't want to jump into Step 9 yet without fully comprehending the program..

Everyone does it differently..I am in a group with a lot of long time recovery so many of the things I am suggested to do have been done by everyone else..and they seem to work.

elizabeth1979

I have been on my first step for months now. Step 1 is hard for me, seems like it wouldn't be, but I cant get my head around some of the work in that step.

I think it is different for everyone. I do alot of writing and alot of journaling, and of course reading.

Even if I am slow, its so much better than being where I was!

pmaslan

I go between step one and two constantly. I agree with Elizabeth step
one is really very difficult.
I have a book that I use to help with the steps by Melody Beattie
"Codenpendents Guide To The Twelve Steps."

Minx1969

Patty -

I used that book in conjunction with my "Paths To Recovery" and the AA twelve steps and twelve traditions and the Alanon Twelve Steps and Twelve traditions.

For step one I focused on:

How am I powerless? How is (was) my life unmanageable?

Then I was able to see the insanity, the controlling, the chaos that came from in myself in trying to focus on other people and their alcoholism.

hope this helps.

pmaslan

I have to admit I don't work the steps as dilegently as I should be.
Sometimes I think that simply because the chaos is gone and I am
removed from the A and go to meetings I am home free...LOL
Thanks Imherenow for bringing this topic up, I am looking at my
book I suggested to you again today. Minx thanks for the help
as well....