I feel so devastated.

Old 04-26-2006, 06:33 PM
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I feel so devastated.

I just found out that my boyfriend (long-distance) was taken to the hospital last night due to heavy bleeding and vomiting.
His housemaid told me when she came, there was blood and vomit everywhere on his sofa, bed and on the floor....
She wasn't sure where he had gone to but later informed me that he's indeed at the hospital...
What's going on?

What is going on????
I hate him.........
yet I love him so much.
I hate him for doing this to himself............
Oh...
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Old 04-26-2006, 07:08 PM
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I'm not a doctor, so I'm just guessing here. It could be a bleeding stomach ulcer due to stress or excessive drinking, it could be a ruptured blood vessel in his stomach due to excessive vomiting, or it could be an esophageal varice. Let's pray it's not the latter, as this is the most serious condition of all.

I lost my father to an esophageal varice (a ruptured blood vessel in his throat) last August--due to esophageal cancer, not alcoholism. He began to spit out small amounts of blood around 11:00 pm one evening. By 3 pm the next day he was gone. The doctors were unable to stop the bleeding and he bled to death before my eyes. It was a horrible sight to witness.

In younger, healthier patients esophageal varices are life-threatening but, if they are caught early, they can cauterize the blood vessel to stop the bleeding and surgically implant an esophageal ring to prevent future bleeding episodes.

A stomach ulcer is a medical emergency, but they are generally not life-threatening when caught early. A ruptured blood vessel in the stomach due to excessive vomiting usually clots and stops on its own when the vomiting gets under control.

Sending prayers to you and your boyfriend. The hospital is the best place for him to be now. He's in good hands and I know the staff there is doing everything they can to turn the situation around. Is his family keeping you up to date on his condition? The new privacy laws were a great hinderance to me when my boyfriend, Richard, was hospitalized due to alcoholism last October. They would only discuss his medical condition with next-of-kin.

Please give us updates as you receive them.
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Old 04-26-2006, 07:09 PM
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Am I correct in assuming he has a serious drinking problem, as in alcoholism? If he's vomiting blood he probably has a bleeding ulcer or damage to his esophagus from pouring so much booze down his throat. I don't know the background of what led to this situation, so I'm making assumptions here. To begin with, you can go to the hospital and give it a shot (if you haven't done so before) and explain to him that he MUST seek help for his addiction. However, in his physical state I'm sure a doctor will tell him to stop drinking now or he'll die. Oftentimes it works. I've been in plenty of AA meetings where people have gotten sober because they had the choice to continue drinking or die.
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Old 04-27-2006, 07:54 AM
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3 years ago a friend of mine, a heavy drinker older man
same thing happened to him. He came home from the VFW
where he had been drinking and proceeded to spew blood
(projectile) all over th house. It was coming from his nose,
mouth and rectum. He was rushed to the hospital where
he was immeditately put on oxygen. He seemed to get a
bit better in the next day or so but unfortunately he did
pass away within the week. I am NOT saying this to scare you
but this is serious business...had he lived the doctors said
he could never touch a drop again.....
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Old 04-27-2006, 08:06 AM
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Im so sorry you are hurting.
This sounds like a very dangerous time for him.

From Melody Beattie..Language of Letting Go, April 25

Each experience, each frustration, each situation, has its own truth waiting to be revealed.

((Ilovehippos))
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Old 04-27-2006, 05:45 PM
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He's ok!!!!!!!!
Now that he's sober since he's been in the hospital, he calls me to tell me 'he needs me."...
When he's drunk, he doesn't even care, and now that he's sober, all of a sudden , I come in to the picture. I hate this.
But he's ok........
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Old 04-27-2006, 09:47 PM
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So glad to hear he's OK. What caused the bleeding? When an alcoholic says they need you, they mean it. They need you to take care of all their responsibilities so they can continue drinking and behaving irresponsibly.

Our goal as friends and family of alcoholics is to learn how to stop enabling them so they can learn how to recognize and deal with the problems created by their drinking problem.

One way to learn how to stop enabling an alcoholic is to attend alanon. Why not give it a try?
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