robina

After finally ending a nine year "on and off" relationship with a gambling addict last year, my love life has been non-existent.

On Friday, however, a nice man who I have been working with for years told me he had two tickets to a concert and he invited me to go with him. I accepted happily. The plan was that I would drive to his place and then we would proceed to the concert in his car.

In the lunch room, he mentioned that he was going to the concert and a younger woman (mid thrities) who adores this man managed to get herself invited too! I'm not sure exactly how this happened, because I only walked in the room at the tail end, when he was informing her that he was going with me, but she was welcome to tag along.

Afterwards, she approached me and asked if I wouldn't mind picking her up so we could go to his place together!

My response to this was to send a polite e-mail to the man that I wouldn't be attending the concert, and I knew that he and her would have a very nice time.

I was suprised that I had the guts and the self esteem to back out of that situation gracefully. I allowed myself to be treated very badly for years by my gambling addict ex-boyfriend.

But when this happened, all I could think was: "I deserve better!". I can thank Al-anon, and all the wonderful SR members here, for giving me some great perspective.

cwohio

good for you robin - you knew well enough not to put yourself in an uncomfortable position and took action. feels good eh?

StandingStrong

(((Robina))) Your post made me smile. You've truly grown. To recognize something is one thing - you went the next step and you removed yourself from a situation that was not good for you. Good job.

minnie

Robina - I like the way you handled that. We teach others how to treat us and you taught him good!

robina

Thanks, it felt good to share that.

I'm not used to expecting others (especially men) to treat me with respect and consideration. It took me out of my comfort zone to stand up for myself, but now I feel great.