escape artist

AH calls me yesterday morning, crying about how his esophagus was still hurting- like he swallowed something and it was stuck there and now he has serious heartburn - and He really didn't drink anything last night- only a couple beers but something is wrong with him. go figure.
well, he used to have chronic heartburn when we first got married and i told him he needed to stop drinking so much and well, he drank less than before we were married and was supposedly "cured" by Pepcid. Never mind maybe he was eating more nutritionally as well. so anyway, i got on the internet to find out about esophageal symptons, as i knew there was a connection with esoph bleeding out, but i told him that i thought that only happened to alcoholics in the advanced stage and surely that couldn't be what was wrong with him. I had originally told him that it was probably nothing to worry about unless he starts coughing up blood and if he gets to that stage he is a goner anyway.

so of course today he has to come around and tells me he owes twice as much money for his gum disease repairs (lost his 8 front teeth) and it made me angry. I said maybe your body is telling you something your mind does not want to hear.

I had no intention of telling him that he has the 3 main risk factors for esoph. cancer, which is becoming more common- heavy alcoholic intake, smoking and heartburn as well as a poor diet-- he doesn't live with us anymore.

but i did bring up the fact that i want to get a life insurance policy taken out on him because with all his medical bills, we will not be able to pay for it -especially if he gets cancer- his employer ins will only cover so much.

and of course he denies denies denies that anything could possibly be wrong with him. as he says he is much better today.

i said, "just make sure you let me know before you see the doctor so i can get the insurance" (he has this twisted idea that as soon as you get life insurance, you die.) so then he retorts, "i'll go to the doctor whenever i want to." and tells me i am not an "expert" as i had just told him that he wasn't when it came to diagnosing what was wrong with the car.

i am really trying to stay out of his business, but why does he have to bring it to me? He comes crying like a baby when something may be wrong with him, but then when i tell him that it could be connected to his alcoholism, he has to defend his fupped uck lifestyle. Maybe he is really here just trying to push my buttons to justify his fix, but i wish he would just drop dead. literally. maybe if i hadn't said anything he would be way closer to that happening anyway. wtf.

FormerDoormat

Yikes! Don't want to add to your worries, but this is one of the symptoms that my father experienced before he was diagnosed with esophageal cancer. Like with lung cancer and cervical cancer, once the first symptoms of esophageal cancer appear, it's normally too late to save them. My father died within two weeks of his diagnosis (he was not an alcoholic).

Some other symptoms of esophageal cancer:

1) Difficulty swallowing meats and vegetables at first, then progressing to difficult swallowing liquids.

2) Frequent hiccups

3) A feeling as if food is backing-up in the chest (and, in fact, it is since the opening to the esophagus is constricted)

4) Frequent heartburn

Folks at high risk for developing esophageal cancer:

1) Smokers

2) Drinkers

3) Folks who've suffered from long-term heartburn.

I pray that he has sense enough to see a doctor asap. Sending prayers your way.

StandingStrong

I really know nothing about this topic, I just wanted you to know that I feel your frustration in reading your post.
You already know that this is something he needs to do. Maybe you need to tell him to stop coming to you if you don't like that he does that. He probably is just wanting you to take care of things for him - like they all do.
Sorry you have to go through this.

denny57

If you are serious about this, you should know you may be unable to get life insurance for him if there is anything in his medical records pointing to alcoholism, etc. You should talk to a professional. You can take a policy out on him and make the payments, but they will request med records. Good luck.