Back in the saddle again!
 

You can tell with that subject title I live in TEXAS!!! LOL..

I wanted to tell everyone that I'm better. My A even called (after moving out 3 wks. ago and screening all contact through the holidays) last night and I didn't feel aflutter. Didn't ask any questions, invite him over, or even request anything.

As I sat back and listened, it is clear he is still in a bad place. I hung up feeling relieved that he wasn't here. Interesting, he is so self-absorbed right now he never asked a single question about me or my kids' lives. I didn't volunteer any info. A month ago I would have flooded him with info. in the hopes to intice him in being involved in our lives.

Is this peace, detachment, or falling out of love?

Cajun,

Who cares what it is when it feels so good! :D

JT

Cajun---I'm so happy that you're starting to take care of you!! How important that is!!! And the answer to your question??? It's probably a little of all three!!! Keep up the good work!!! Love----LACEEJOE

Cajun,
I call it the beauty of letting go!!!!!!!! It feels good doesnt it??? Being actually thankful there not so close to home. Sharing the good feelings lets people know there is truly hope!!! Hang in there...one baby step at a time.


Many Hugs!!!!

Cajun,

I smiled when I read your post. GOOD FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!! You're doing something right, so keep it up!!!! I love hearing success stories. I know you haven't 'arrived yet'....still on the road to recovery...but it is so encouraging to see progress in our family here at soberrecovery.com. :)

Hugs!

Hoorayyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
How excellent! I am so glad you are feeling the detachment, or whatever it is! You sound good and are an inspiration to me. Keep on keeping on!

How do you get to this place??
 

I am desperate to feel like me again. I am a shadow of who i used to be. Self esteem is shot, feel all these horrible things about myself like I'm a failure. I couldn't help. I make him so mad he drinks. Then I feel like I'm feeling sorry for myself. What little things do you do each day to help or fix yourself??/
Signed,
sad but hopefull

Hi, Snitzle----welcome to the Boards. Hopefully you will receive the support you need here.

First of all----know that no matter how angry your A gets, it is not your fault that he drinks!!! If he says that it is, then he is just trying to place the blame somewhere other than where it should be----with himself!!!! The problem with losing our self-esteem over time is that we tend to believe all the rotten things that are thrown at us. I found over the years that it is easier to believe the bad things than it is the good. After all, we tend to hear more bad, right???

Time to start building up that self-worth again, Snitzle---and coming here to the board and attending Alanon meetings are the best start you can get. Don't be afraid to let all your feelings out, because you'll be surprised at how many of us have been where you are right now. We're a family here, and no one will judge. Somehow, every time I get on the board and read what others are saying---I walk away feeling better!!! These people are awesome----and more caring than I ever thought possible!!! Hopefully, you will see that also, and get the support you need. Love, LACEEJOE