General unhappiness and irritability

Old 12-19-2005, 10:27 AM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Acting not reacting
Thread Starter
 
elizabeth1979's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: My happy place
Posts: 1,788
General unhappiness and irritability

I am really not happy with my life, my decisions, and my emotions lately.
I usually like this season, but am nothing but irritated with it this year. I would like ot skip Christmas entirely. It makes me irate that I cant buy gifts for people due to my financial situation. I didnt get a Christmas bonus for the first time in 8 years. That bonus was equal to 2 weeks pay, and has always been my Christmas money. I ma annoyed bc I am at this stupid job still, and when I sent my resume out in search of better opportunities, Ive had no response.

Im pissed that I am surrounded by selfish people and addicts, who generally contribure to my unhappiness instead of happiness. Im mad that I cant separate myself from them permanently and continue to allow myself to feel this way.

Im tired of bullsh** and swear the nex ttime someone patronizes me or asks a favor, I am going to lose it.

Im just in a bad mood. Insight anyone? ideas as to how I can get past this feeling of disappointment and anger?
elizabeth1979 is offline  
Old 12-19-2005, 10:42 AM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 4,955
First of all, you have a right to all these feelings.
Let yourself feel them and work through them.
Then come up with a plan.
Maybe this is the year you keep Christmas simple.
Maybe in January you open a Christmas Club account so (bonus or no bonus) you have some gift money next year.
It's hard when we have expectations about a holiday that can't be met.
A week from today it will all be over for this year.
And sorry about the bonus, that blows.
Gabe is offline  
Old 12-19-2005, 01:02 PM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Dancing To My Own Beat
 
Magichappens's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: I don't know what kind of state I'm in
Posts: 1,326
One thing that helped me a lot was to reach out to new people who weren't looking to destroy my serenity. Of course, that meant not spending as much time with those people I was used too. When the same old stuff isn't cutting it, I have to get busy trying something new. It's not all guaranteed to work out, but the old stuff is guaranteed to stop working at some point. I wish you courage and strength to try something new. Hugs, Magic
Magichappens is offline  
Old 12-19-2005, 01:07 PM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Member
 
Minx1969's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Arizona
Posts: 928
You have been through a lot recently..of course you are upset..

Hang in there..the great thing about moods is that they change..You may want to start journalling..it always helps me when I'm upset..

Just feel the feelings..there's not much you can do other then feel them..

As for the Xmas presents, you could always bake cookies or something..People love homemade gifts..
Minx1969 is offline  
Old 12-19-2005, 01:11 PM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Acting not reacting
Thread Starter
 
elizabeth1979's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: My happy place
Posts: 1,788
Christmas club...very very good idea and I will start that in January, no more excuses!

Im realizing today that I am very upset at myself for allowing myself to get as sick as I got. I only had friends that were users and not healthy, and once I saw the light and cut down on the time I spent with them, I realized I had no one left. Its my own doing I know, but it just sucks.
elizabeth1979 is offline  
Old 12-19-2005, 01:30 PM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 4,955
Originally Posted by Magichappens
One thing that helped me a lot was to reach out to new people who weren't looking to destroy my serenity.
Wow, there is a lot of power in that statement.
I think sometimes we need to review our lives and our associates.
If we're surrounded by people who are out to destroy our serenity, it's time for a change of venue.
Thanks Magic.
Gabe is offline  
Old 12-19-2005, 09:43 PM
  # 7 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Parker, CO
Posts: 495
I know you had an ectopic pregnancy recently, that could be contributing to your generalized sense of unhappiness. THat is pretty traumatic.


I know sometimes I feel some of the same things you do. I just get so sick of it all. I think in general we all do some days.

But if these feelings persisit, I would mention it to your doctor.

Hang in there, get some rest and take care.

I know it sucks not getting a bonus this year. But remember, it's not about the gifts either.
meli2005 is offline  
Old 12-20-2005, 05:11 AM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Alcohol is a cruel mistress!!!
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: crownpoint newyork
Posts: 820
Hi Sarah Elizabeth, Keep in mind all you have been through recently. I would be unhappy and irritabil too. The bonus situation is really too bad. I think once a company starts bonuses they need to keep them up as people beginning to count on them. Better not to start them at all instead of suddenly stop them. Did the give you a warning not to expect it. I feel they should have warned you say in October so no one would count on them for christmas expenses. I know what you mean about selfish people. My sister is one of them and it drives me crazy. I can't believe after whats been happening to you lately that people are asking you for favors, I don't blame you for being pissed. As far as insight for your dissappointment and anger, I might suggest turning this over to your HP. There is a saying in my old church that we can offerer our troubles over to God and he will help us carry the load. I hope that wasn't too corny for you. Maybe you could try meditation or at least deep breathing excerizes. They help me. I pray things get better for you soon. Just take care of you, and to kind things for yourself. With love,
reader is offline  
Old 12-20-2005, 05:32 AM
  # 9 (permalink)  
I'm no angel!
 
dollydo's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: tampa, fl
Posts: 6,728
"Serenity", we all strive for that..I understand where you are coming from and how you feel.

I just had a big blow up with my 80 yr old father..a stingy, self-centered man, one who has disrupted my serenity for over 50 years...I am stuck with him...you on the other hand can circle yourself with new friends, ones who offer support.

Right this minute I am as disgusted as I ever have been, yet, I know with time I will overcome my "mood" and go forward, yet, with another hope of peace & serenity.

Keep moving forward, this too shall pass.

Dolly
dollydo is offline  
Old 12-20-2005, 05:02 PM
  # 10 (permalink)  
Member
 
sunshinebluesky's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: north carolina
Posts: 365
ive had a rough few days too.no matter what i told myself i couldnt get out from under the depression,anger,self pity.i cant even get my shopping done,because i am so not into it.so many times in the past few days i thought,how the hell am i ever gonna get thru the next week.
i moved here 10 years ago,and still have not made any friends. every time i tried it seemed i met someone else who wasnt healthy,whether it be drinking,drugs or both,or just very unstable. when i do meet people who arent like this,it seems they have old friendships,and they arent very open to including someone new. its hard,especially now around the holidays. and especially when i,too, have been on the emotional roller coaster the last few days. i saw some strange woman (not his girfriend) driving my ex's car yesterday.wearing a santa hat,all cheery and such. i couldnt even eat the sandwich i had just bought. i started thinking about him having such a fun,wonderful xmas with all these people around.
later,when i got alittle more rational....i realized-yeah probably a bunch of drunk people. that he doesnt even know that well,who( probably are) and will, take advantage of him down the line...i can only hope.
as far as the money/gift part--ive been there,many times. just do what you can...as said, home made gifts are nice,me myself i love some of the stuff at the dollar store. its disappointing when you cant do what you want, but it IS the thought that counts. and there is always next year. or better yet...any time.
hang in there.....thats all we can do......idget started a thread about ways to deal with our emotions right now--im hoping people keep it going,because i sure am going to need it. im also toying with the idea of going out and buying one of those speed bags,and some boxing gloves!!!!!!!
sunshinebluesky is offline  
Old 12-20-2005, 05:39 PM
  # 11 (permalink)  
doing the inside job
 
nutz's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: planet happy
Posts: 542
I was reading something today about our moods.
Be greatful for good moods and graceful for low moods.

We shouldn't take things too seriously when we're in our low moods.
Like judge ourselves, our lives, situations.. etc. Mostly like we would
think or feel everything sucks while we're in our low moods.

Yes I can relate to how it seems like everybody around me just
want ,or take and take , and take and still want more and of course
for active addicts too much is never enough. it's draining.

I don't have answers for all of my problems or challenges.
I JUST LOVE MYSELF NO MATTER WHAT.
It hasn't been easy praticing it or doing it.
Belive me, life is NOT what i think it ought to be or want, think it ought to be.
Sometimes I don't even think GOD Loves or gives a rat's ass about me and
I surely don't expect much from peaple....so that shows where I'm at.lol
So... I keep it really simple today and It's probably the only thing I have
control over my life or make sense or a different.
I make this chioce everyday , every moment, oneday at a time.
I LOVE MYSELF NO MATTER WHAT..and yeah even if it seems like god dosen't
loves me or life sucks. It's not the answers for everything. It's my answer
and i stopped beating up myself no matter what too.
nutz is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 02:34 AM.