bahookie

ARG!

I was woken last night about midnight by her whispering in my ear -

Do you want to not be here?

I can't even think of the right answer to that one, not in sleepy monosyllables anyway. I kind of grunted, I think.

Yes would mean yes that's right, no would mean no I don't want to be here!
Wouldn't it be easier (and more accurate!) to ask me when I'm awake?


OOOOOOOOO I wonder what else has been whispered in my ear!
Jane
xxxx

best

So that is how my wife finds out my secrets? *LOL*

Communication. Bring it up, now that your awake. Talk it over.

minnie

Ugh. You've just reminded me that R used to do the same thing. Usually to try and tempt me into another marathon discussion that didn't get us anywhere except sleep deprived. Selfish sod. After a couple of times, I ended up in the spare room.

You did the right thing.

bahookie

LOL

I'd never even have thought about doing something like that.

You're right, I'll bring it up when I've regained my strength and the kids go back to their dad's at the weekend.

I keep finding it weird that a simple step like that is something that has to be suggested to me. It's like forgetting how to bruch my teeth or something.

Slept like a log by the way!

Jane
xxx

Jazzman

I sure don't miss the mind games. That's a new one on me!

bahookie

actually, in happier times I'd be happy to have things whispered in my ear in the middle of the night

J
xxx

Jazzman

Don't need that visual.....
14 months now....

cwohio

9 months for me jazz - i hear ya!

jane - has this happened before?

bahookie

No..... that I know of!

Starting to recover from the weekend I think, feeling much brighter and the world isn't pushing in on me. All I think about last night is that it's sad she can't talk to me face to face.

not rushing into anything, still taking it easy

Sorry both of you, if it's any consolation I'm starting to forget what it's like myself!

J
xxx

cwohio

yes, or maybe she is afraid of the answer!

good to know we celibate folks are not alone!

equus

How about....

"I want sleep." Blah!! If a yes/no question is confusing I just give a statement of what I mean - then at least I know what I've said even if everyone else is confused!!

DesertEyes

Hmmm.... do I need to talk to my sponsor if the first thought that pops into my head is about what I should have whispered into _her_ ear in the middle of the night?

"I want NA" "I want NA" "I want NA" "I want NA" "I want NA"

could that be considered controlling? nah.....

Mike :-)

gelfling

That just absolutely freaked me out...the whispering, not the celibacy.

pmaslan

Jane....
Mine never whispered in my ear...he was too busy barking out orders in his sleep. He was an officer in the Navy for 20 years and from time to time I think he still thought he was...well at least in his sleep he did....lol
Hopefully, the weekend will bring a quiet time to have a long over due discussion.....

bahookie

Hey

Mentioned it last night - denied it, said she said something loving, didn't ask me a question at all.

Ho hum, if you just deny everything then it makes the world ok. Why haven't we all thought of that?



J
xxx

best

But I did think of it. I also found it doesn't work *LOL*

Talking it out, even with the outcome that came of it... you have broken the ice in a manner of speaking. A next time of a need for a talk, the wall may come down a little more. I wouldn't push the issue but I would keep the hope of the wall coming down one day.

When a wall comes down, we may not like what is seen on the other side.
When a wall comes down... just listen and if anything negative comes out, know that it is just held in emotions and feelings. Once such is out and gone, growth can come all the faster.

minnie

Oh, Jane, I think we all have in one way or another.

bahookie

oh, ok, yes, I have.

smarty pants

J
xxx

Gabe

Denial...yes...I have been a willing participant.

lojomama