Justbreathe
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2002
Location: San diego, CA, USA
Posts: 86
Justbreathe
Justbreathe....
You did not offend me at all.... I was exactly like you before I got married.... I had my doubts big time.... and I wish so bad I had taken some advice that was given to me at the time.... There is no cure for an addiction.... The person that uses has to want to stop using... My husband has told me over and over again... that he was done... He would stop for a couple of months (or so I thought...) here and there... but in all honesty... I had my blinders on... I did not want to see the truth... I wanted to believe in him and that we would have this wonderful wedding and everything would be beautiful!!!!! Well my wedding was beautiful.... We also were able to save thousands of dollars... and on the outside and looking at the photographs... Everything was outstanding... but on the inside it was not....
I was hurt... and I was also holding on with my dear life of the hope... The hope that my husband would stay clean and sober and not lie to me.... Well he just got out of rehab once again... Again I had the hope that he was on the path to recovery.... Well I caught him locked in my bathroom at 0630 am in the morning... getting ready to smoke meth off of tin foil.... He even lied to me after he did it....I told him he had to leave once again.... He is currently sleeping at the neighborhood park.... This is a 30 year old man... Gorgeous... Strong.... and has more potential than I can imagne.... But HE chooses not to use it..... It is so sad... Remember sobriety is NOT a guaranteed thing..... Don't feel as if you offened me... You did not.... I love you.... I see alot of your hope and love that I also had two years ago.... I just do not want you to feel as if I do....
I am heartbroken..... and I'm just taking one day at a time... Never give up your hope.... Continue to have faith.... and don't forget marriage is a huge commitment!!!!!
I will pray for you Justbreathe... I pray for you and your man.... I love you... Hugs to you... Your Friend.... Clowie
You did not offend me at all.... I was exactly like you before I got married.... I had my doubts big time.... and I wish so bad I had taken some advice that was given to me at the time.... There is no cure for an addiction.... The person that uses has to want to stop using... My husband has told me over and over again... that he was done... He would stop for a couple of months (or so I thought...) here and there... but in all honesty... I had my blinders on... I did not want to see the truth... I wanted to believe in him and that we would have this wonderful wedding and everything would be beautiful!!!!! Well my wedding was beautiful.... We also were able to save thousands of dollars... and on the outside and looking at the photographs... Everything was outstanding... but on the inside it was not....
I was hurt... and I was also holding on with my dear life of the hope... The hope that my husband would stay clean and sober and not lie to me.... Well he just got out of rehab once again... Again I had the hope that he was on the path to recovery.... Well I caught him locked in my bathroom at 0630 am in the morning... getting ready to smoke meth off of tin foil.... He even lied to me after he did it....I told him he had to leave once again.... He is currently sleeping at the neighborhood park.... This is a 30 year old man... Gorgeous... Strong.... and has more potential than I can imagne.... But HE chooses not to use it..... It is so sad... Remember sobriety is NOT a guaranteed thing..... Don't feel as if you offened me... You did not.... I love you.... I see alot of your hope and love that I also had two years ago.... I just do not want you to feel as if I do....
I am heartbroken..... and I'm just taking one day at a time... Never give up your hope.... Continue to have faith.... and don't forget marriage is a huge commitment!!!!!
I will pray for you Justbreathe... I pray for you and your man.... I love you... Hugs to you... Your Friend.... Clowie
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Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: NY
Posts: 16
Clowie 
Thanks, I am so happy to hear that you weren't offended. I totally hear where you are coming from. Sigh..... i am going wedding dress shopping with my mom tomorrow.....and now i am wondering if i should even go. I don't think I will enjoy it as much as "normal" brides would.
I guess I have to hang on to my hope and time will tell. If it winds up being the biggest mistake of my life I will admit fault and move on. As i write this I have a huge lump in my throat trying not to cry. I have never ever loved someone as much as i love him and like your A, mine is also 30 years old, beautiful, smart and strong. No one has ever loved me as much as he does. He told me his life was changed when he met me, as I am his true love.
I don't know......I guess all i can do is pray.
(((Clowie))))
J
:okay:
Thanks, I am so happy to hear that you weren't offended. I totally hear where you are coming from. Sigh..... i am going wedding dress shopping with my mom tomorrow.....and now i am wondering if i should even go. I don't think I will enjoy it as much as "normal" brides would.
I guess I have to hang on to my hope and time will tell. If it winds up being the biggest mistake of my life I will admit fault and move on. As i write this I have a huge lump in my throat trying not to cry. I have never ever loved someone as much as i love him and like your A, mine is also 30 years old, beautiful, smart and strong. No one has ever loved me as much as he does. He told me his life was changed when he met me, as I am his true love.
I don't know......I guess all i can do is pray.
(((Clowie))))
J
:okay:
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