Shutterbugs post / im mr R and you who answered her post offend me and my wife
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Shutterbugs post / im mr R and you who answered her post offend me and my wife
I dont realy care how much you people trash on me but never call someone a lier unless you know this person, because it makes you out to be a hypocrit.
ok listen up people.
#1 i tell my wife EVERYTHING
#2 what substitutes audultry or intimate relationship on the inter net?
#2b we never talk of sex for starters #2c I love my wife but where does it say we are not allowed to love our friends and keep them close. I have freinds around me that i tell them often that i love them and they are guys and there wives, does that meen im cheeting on my wife?
#3 Shutterbug didnt show you everything she only showed you the letters that made her feel good.
#4 i have made it pretty fing clear that im married and will never leave my wife and that our relationship cannot go beyond freindship.
#5 what pisses me off the most is that you hurt her feelings i dont realy give a rats ass about mine other then being called a llier in which case i resent that, god forbid any of you people to have freinds.
#6 Besides my wife, i have no family so what makes you jerks think im going to lie to her and give her up. I have no parents i have no family outside my wife.
so about as close As shutterbug/jenna can realy get is a sister. cause i will never ever cheet on my wife.
#7 i have a big issue with trust, what gives you the right to trash on and demean a person you dont even know?
#8 threw my whole internet relationship this last winter that almost cause me and my wife to get devorced i never lied to her once she new about it from day one. except that she realized from reading about bipolor people is that it happens alot and she stuck with me untill i realized the fantsy of it all. i would say more to you in my anger but i am done the rest is non of your buisness.
But judge not lest ye be juged for the job of judging is gods and Jesus Christs not yours.
you know me not therefore you do not have the right to judge me.
#9 More then judging me you insulted my wife and my family, you not only call me a lier but my wife a lier and that angers me no one calls my wife a lier or insults her, if these people that im talking about were in front of me now id nock there teeth out of there little heads.
whatch what you say about other people they are probably reading your ignorent demeaning posts.yeah you struck a nerve calling me a lier and saying that im commitining adultry and well for those of you that dont know what im talking about go back about 3 pages and read shutterbugs post. I pray to god that those people who seid these bad things get their just rewards.
ok listen up people.
#1 i tell my wife EVERYTHING
#2 what substitutes audultry or intimate relationship on the inter net?
#2b we never talk of sex for starters #2c I love my wife but where does it say we are not allowed to love our friends and keep them close. I have freinds around me that i tell them often that i love them and they are guys and there wives, does that meen im cheeting on my wife?
#3 Shutterbug didnt show you everything she only showed you the letters that made her feel good.
#4 i have made it pretty fing clear that im married and will never leave my wife and that our relationship cannot go beyond freindship.
#5 what pisses me off the most is that you hurt her feelings i dont realy give a rats ass about mine other then being called a llier in which case i resent that, god forbid any of you people to have freinds.
#6 Besides my wife, i have no family so what makes you jerks think im going to lie to her and give her up. I have no parents i have no family outside my wife.
so about as close As shutterbug/jenna can realy get is a sister. cause i will never ever cheet on my wife.
#7 i have a big issue with trust, what gives you the right to trash on and demean a person you dont even know?
#8 threw my whole internet relationship this last winter that almost cause me and my wife to get devorced i never lied to her once she new about it from day one. except that she realized from reading about bipolor people is that it happens alot and she stuck with me untill i realized the fantsy of it all. i would say more to you in my anger but i am done the rest is non of your buisness.
But judge not lest ye be juged for the job of judging is gods and Jesus Christs not yours.
you know me not therefore you do not have the right to judge me.
#9 More then judging me you insulted my wife and my family, you not only call me a lier but my wife a lier and that angers me no one calls my wife a lier or insults her, if these people that im talking about were in front of me now id nock there teeth out of there little heads.
whatch what you say about other people they are probably reading your ignorent demeaning posts.yeah you struck a nerve calling me a lier and saying that im commitining adultry and well for those of you that dont know what im talking about go back about 3 pages and read shutterbugs post. I pray to god that those people who seid these bad things get their just rewards.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
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<TABLE class=tborder cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=6 width="100%" align=center border=0><TBODY><TR vAlign=top><TD class=alt2 width=175>ryanjosef<SCRIPT type=text/javascript> vbmenu_register("postmenu_", true); </SCRIPT>
Ryan
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</TD><TD class=alt1><!-- icon and title -->screw you
<HR style="COLOR: #d1d1e1" SIZE=1><!-- / icon and title --><!-- message -->where do you get off calling some one a jerk when you dont even know them and listen ass hole my wife seid i could make her a dreamcatcher and my wife is helping me make it for jenna because my wife knows that jenna is a freind and thats it and i love my freinds. sounds like your jelouse cause you dont have any but when you make comments about people that you dont know like you did well screwyou too. I never lie to my wife by the ways so dont go judging me thats gods right not yours and since you dont know **** about me keep your mouth shut when insulting others.
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Am I the only member to have a PM?
Ryan
Join Date: Jul 2005
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</TD><TD class=alt1><!-- icon and title -->screw you
<HR style="COLOR: #d1d1e1" SIZE=1><!-- / icon and title --><!-- message -->where do you get off calling some one a jerk when you dont even know them and listen ass hole my wife seid i could make her a dreamcatcher and my wife is helping me make it for jenna because my wife knows that jenna is a freind and thats it and i love my freinds. sounds like your jelouse cause you dont have any but when you make comments about people that you dont know like you did well screwyou too. I never lie to my wife by the ways so dont go judging me thats gods right not yours and since you dont know **** about me keep your mouth shut when insulting others.
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Am I the only member to have a PM?
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Originally Posted by equus
Write me off as a suspicious old cow - but have you ever met him?
You only have his word for everything - including the involvment of his wife and family. Trust shouldn't be black and white, it should grow slowly as you know someone, get a few dents because no human being can be perfectly trustworthy, recover, grow a little more etc etc. I wouldn't hand that quantity over all at once - you seem to have no doubt in anything he says.
Look after yourself, offer yourself a little protection, you're worth it!
You only have his word for everything - including the involvment of his wife and family. Trust shouldn't be black and white, it should grow slowly as you know someone, get a few dents because no human being can be perfectly trustworthy, recover, grow a little more etc etc. I wouldn't hand that quantity over all at once - you seem to have no doubt in anything he says.
Look after yourself, offer yourself a little protection, you're worth it!
I think what you've perhaps misunderstood is that people can feel protective towards someone who's vulnerable and yes, I do wish she would offer herself a little more protection - because she is worth it. Sorry that offends you, it certainly does not insult your whole family.
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: San Francisco, CA
Posts: 491
I dont believe your wife has seen the things you wrote, such as hey most gergous, baby, sugar, sweetdreams my love... even though you say you tell her everything, I think you forgot to tell her you call Jenna your love as well. I dont care if you tell me you do I would have to say your lying but it doesnt really matter what I think.
I'm really sorry Ryan, I can sense you have quite some troubles in your life and I hope you maybe able to live life happily someday. I think what your doing is wrong and sad but I believe you deep down strive to do right and its never too late, and I sincerely wish you the best in life.
I'm really sorry Ryan, I can sense you have quite some troubles in your life and I hope you maybe able to live life happily someday. I think what your doing is wrong and sad but I believe you deep down strive to do right and its never too late, and I sincerely wish you the best in life.
A picture's worth a 1000 words
Join Date: Aug 2004
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Equus...thank you for having kinder words than most. But the fact is that for the most pare I didn't feel like you guys were being protective of me...you have to care about someone to be protective. I feel like you guys trashed me and Ryan...almost just for the "fun" of it. I unknowingly posted in the midst of a lot of people who are dealing with their partners cheating on them....and everyone seemed to jump on my back and take out their frustrations on me. I was just reaching out for guidence from a forum that I once trusted the people in b/c this man is very special to me and I hate that I am "in" love with him...I so very much wish I only had brother/sisterly feelings, but I don't. He's the only person who's here for me day in and day out who understands me and my illness. There aren't very many people who frequent the mental health forum that is my home and I reached out to you guys with my issues of co-dependence....for the first time in a really long time...and what I welcome back I got....jimminy christmas...if I didn't love some of the awsome people here so very much then I would never come back. Which is the saddest part because I have become a HUGE advocate of SR. I am constantly directing people here to find others who understand and offer the support and love I have seen in the year I've been around here. I am not the enemy you guys made me out to be and neither is Ryan. The fact that didn't even bat an I at me for posting somehting where people ripped him a new one ....says a lot to me. He didn't care what you guys said about him, except for the lying part which I can understand b/c he is like me in that he strives to always be as open and honest with people as possible. I would take offense to being called a liar too, because the world is full of them...probably many of them here....but I am proud of myself in that I always strive to be honest with people about everything...as does Ryan. People like us are a dying breed and so yeah...we dont' like to be thrown into the same lump as all those others who truly are liars. My own father lies to me and I dont' talk to him anymore...that's how much I value honesty.
Anyway...what I observed today was NOT me being protected...but rather ridicule and unfair judgement. Ryan on the other hand, truly did want to protect me from being hurt by you guys b/c he understnads how truly hurt I have felt by all this today. He is very protective of all those he loves and I feel proud to be able to call such a great and wonderful person my friend
I made the mistake of thinking that others here are as loving and caring as me and Ryan are and that people here would truly offer me help in my feelings of wanting to be more than best friends and a sister to him. I know it can’t ever be more and I dont’ want it to ever be more…but I’m still having those feelings and wanted loving suggestions of how to pull my heart back a little from being too attached to him. All you guys have accomplished is making me want to cling to him even more b/c of how much he TRULY understands me…..say whatever you want, but he does and only him and I know how true that is. Although, I know that many other bipolars would understand the difficulties in finding people who really do understand what It’s like to live our lives with this illness and we tend to cling to each other no matter what the circumstance b/c everyone has a desire to not feel so alone in their struggles which is why so many of you are even here at this forum….you want support from people who understand what you are going through.
Obviously I’ve been completely misunderstood by most of you and that just justifies my thoughts about so many people not being able to understand those of us who are severly emotionally tramatized from life and people exactly like yourselves who can’t look past your own noses.
Ryan is a God-send to me and this just confirms that I will continue to cherish his friendship forever. So think what you will, but maybe next time somebody comes to you for real love and support you won’t be so quick to try and condemn them and chase them away….b/c otherwise I’m gunna have to put a disclaimer on all my referalls to this site.
May God bless you all….some of you need it much more than others,
Jenna
P.S. Ryan, thank you for coming to my defense and putting yourself out here when you didnt' have to. I am so very thankful for you and feel truly blessed to have you in my life.
Anyway...what I observed today was NOT me being protected...but rather ridicule and unfair judgement. Ryan on the other hand, truly did want to protect me from being hurt by you guys b/c he understnads how truly hurt I have felt by all this today. He is very protective of all those he loves and I feel proud to be able to call such a great and wonderful person my friend
I made the mistake of thinking that others here are as loving and caring as me and Ryan are and that people here would truly offer me help in my feelings of wanting to be more than best friends and a sister to him. I know it can’t ever be more and I dont’ want it to ever be more…but I’m still having those feelings and wanted loving suggestions of how to pull my heart back a little from being too attached to him. All you guys have accomplished is making me want to cling to him even more b/c of how much he TRULY understands me…..say whatever you want, but he does and only him and I know how true that is. Although, I know that many other bipolars would understand the difficulties in finding people who really do understand what It’s like to live our lives with this illness and we tend to cling to each other no matter what the circumstance b/c everyone has a desire to not feel so alone in their struggles which is why so many of you are even here at this forum….you want support from people who understand what you are going through.
Obviously I’ve been completely misunderstood by most of you and that just justifies my thoughts about so many people not being able to understand those of us who are severly emotionally tramatized from life and people exactly like yourselves who can’t look past your own noses.
Ryan is a God-send to me and this just confirms that I will continue to cherish his friendship forever. So think what you will, but maybe next time somebody comes to you for real love and support you won’t be so quick to try and condemn them and chase them away….b/c otherwise I’m gunna have to put a disclaimer on all my referalls to this site.
May God bless you all….some of you need it much more than others,
Jenna
P.S. Ryan, thank you for coming to my defense and putting yourself out here when you didnt' have to. I am so very thankful for you and feel truly blessed to have you in my life.
Don't get undies in a bunch
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: South Shore MA
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Shutterbug
From what I have seen posted just in this thread alone, my thoughts are...
Sometimes people who protect don't always say what we want to hear.
As delicate as your personality can be, please take this warning seriously...
Internet love and relationships can ruin lives as fast and sometimes even faster then they can start up.
Walk very carefully and take caution of what "might" be.
I would trust no married person on line that says their spouse knows all about it...Unless I talked with the spouse by phone or in person as the read the posts and e-mails of both me and the other.
From what I have seen posted just in this thread alone, my thoughts are...
Sometimes people who protect don't always say what we want to hear.
As delicate as your personality can be, please take this warning seriously...
Internet love and relationships can ruin lives as fast and sometimes even faster then they can start up.
Walk very carefully and take caution of what "might" be.
I would trust no married person on line that says their spouse knows all about it...Unless I talked with the spouse by phone or in person as the read the posts and e-mails of both me and the other.
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 4,955
Bug...falling for unavailable people is a classic Codie characteristic.
Especially when that unavailable person presents themselves as "our Savior".
Your feelings are real and I respect that.
I'm sure that the feedback you got here was meant well.
I think we Codies tend to panic when we see someone who is already hurting getting involved in something that can only hurt them more.
Part of recovery is finding healthy relationships with people who are available to us in the ways we need them.
As for me, I value my "protective" friends.
Most of the time, they can see things a lot more objectively than I can.
Especially when that unavailable person presents themselves as "our Savior".
Your feelings are real and I respect that.
I'm sure that the feedback you got here was meant well.
I think we Codies tend to panic when we see someone who is already hurting getting involved in something that can only hurt them more.
Part of recovery is finding healthy relationships with people who are available to us in the ways we need them.
As for me, I value my "protective" friends.
Most of the time, they can see things a lot more objectively than I can.
A picture's worth a 1000 words
Join Date: Aug 2004
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Thank you Gabe...I respect your words. And maybe that's what really happened here....maybe people just started panicing faster than they could think about how their words were coming across.
It's just really hard for me to sit by and let people talk about someone I care about in such mean ways. Unavailable? Yes....in physical sense. NO....in being here for me everyday to help me when I need someone who understands me.
I understand...the classic codieness here and that's why I came to you guys...I KNEW that my codieness was lending itself to unsafe, unrealistic feeling of being "in" love with him. But loving him in a friend/sister way has nothing wrong with it. And he has never acted like "my savior"....if anything, I have placed that kind of EARTHLY value on him for what happiness he has brought into my dreary and dark world at the moment.
Anyway....see...in your response...I totally feel like you are offering words of love and support and caring in a non-judgemental way and I can't thank you enough for letting me know that there are still some people I feel truly care in this F&F forum.
I'M HEADING TO BED NOW.....SO PLEASE GUYS....EVERYONE ELSE: IF YOU DONT' HAVE LOVING AND SUPPORTIVE AND KIND WORDS TO SAY TO ME OR RYAN THEN AT THIS POINT PLEASE DON'T SAY THEM AT ALL. I BEG YOU...I KNOW MOST OF YOU COULD NEVER UNDERSTAND BUT THIS HAS ALL BEEN ALMOST TOO MUCH FOR ME TO HANDLE.
GOODNIGHT AND GOD BLESS,
JENNA
It's just really hard for me to sit by and let people talk about someone I care about in such mean ways. Unavailable? Yes....in physical sense. NO....in being here for me everyday to help me when I need someone who understands me.
I understand...the classic codieness here and that's why I came to you guys...I KNEW that my codieness was lending itself to unsafe, unrealistic feeling of being "in" love with him. But loving him in a friend/sister way has nothing wrong with it. And he has never acted like "my savior"....if anything, I have placed that kind of EARTHLY value on him for what happiness he has brought into my dreary and dark world at the moment.
Anyway....see...in your response...I totally feel like you are offering words of love and support and caring in a non-judgemental way and I can't thank you enough for letting me know that there are still some people I feel truly care in this F&F forum.
I'M HEADING TO BED NOW.....SO PLEASE GUYS....EVERYONE ELSE: IF YOU DONT' HAVE LOVING AND SUPPORTIVE AND KIND WORDS TO SAY TO ME OR RYAN THEN AT THIS POINT PLEASE DON'T SAY THEM AT ALL. I BEG YOU...I KNOW MOST OF YOU COULD NEVER UNDERSTAND BUT THIS HAS ALL BEEN ALMOST TOO MUCH FOR ME TO HANDLE.
GOODNIGHT AND GOD BLESS,
JENNA
the girl can't help it
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: splendraville
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Originally Posted by ryanjosef
if these people that im talking about were in front of me now id nock there teeth out of there little heads
as a man thinketh in his mind. It doesn't take much for you to want to resort to violence does it....
We are saved by grace...justice would kill us all dude...
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Queens, NY
Posts: 71
Originally Posted by ryanjosef
whatch what you say about other people they are probably reading your ignorent demeaning posts.yeah you struck a nerve calling me a lier and saying that im commitining adultry and well for those of you that dont know what im talking about go back about 3 pages and read shutterbugs post. I pray to god that those people who seid these bad things get their just rewards.
Member
Join Date: May 2004
Location: England
Posts: 3,410
Shutterbug - if you don'r read any other posts today, just read the one at the top from Ryan. He is showing you his true colours. If, in the future, you hack him off, he will be this way with you.
Keep yourself safe.
Keep yourself safe.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: out there...
Posts: 2,653
How bout we alll stroll over and read the Soberrecovery posting guidelines?
just a suggestion. http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...splay.php?f=34
just a suggestion. http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...splay.php?f=34
1000 Post Club
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Recoveryville, USA
Posts: 1,297
Originally Posted by Gooch
How bout we alll stroll over and read the Soberrecovery posting guidelines?
just a suggestion. http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...splay.php?f=34
just a suggestion. http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...splay.php?f=34
Member
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: houston, tx
Posts: 323
Shutterbug- No amount of sugar coating can justify what you are doing. It is very very wrong. Th violence in this man's posting is frightening. Get some counseling. This is a pathetic , dangerous situation. dax
1000 Post Club
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Originally Posted by shutterbug
SO PLEASE GUYS....EVERYONE ELSE: IF YOU DONT' HAVE LOVING AND SUPPORTIVE AND KIND WORDS TO SAY TO ME OR RYAN THEN AT THIS POINT PLEASE DON'T SAY THEM AT ALL. I BEG YOU.
I dont co-sign anyone's baloney.....you are in way deep, and it seems like you wish to stay instead of pull your self out.
Your choice, to be sure, but as you chose the action, you chose the consequence.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: uk
Posts: 3,054
6. No attacks, insults, or flames - be it on someone's person, religious beliefs, race, national background, sexual orientation, recovery program or whatever. This is one of our most important rules. If you have a problem with somebody, do not flame them on our boards. Take it somewhere else. No flaming of ANY kind is welcome here. The quickest way to get banned from our boards is to break this rule.
If you have a problem with somebody, do not flame them on our boards. Take it somewhere else.
Acting not reacting
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MR RYANJOSEF,
Nothing I said to shutterbug was with malicious intent. I did not personally feel that her post originally reflected a healthy relationship between the 2 of you.
You indicated to me that it was none of my business in your pm to me. Unfortunately for you, when someone posts here asking a question or for advice, people usually attempt to help, thereby making it our business.
I dont know you and therefore will not make personal attacks about your character. That in my opinion is uncalled for and does not make for a healing recovering environment, which SR is SUPPOSED TO BE. Is it supposed to be trolling grounds for vulnerable women? I must have missed that sticky.
I do not believe a word of anything you say and have the right to base an opinion about you based on the information given. Having said that, I hope Jenna sees what I see. I dont think I need to elaborate what exactly that is, as its blatantly apparent through your words to everyone.
Good luck with your anger problem.
MR RYANJOSEF,
Nothing I said to shutterbug was with malicious intent. I did not personally feel that her post originally reflected a healthy relationship between the 2 of you.
You indicated to me that it was none of my business in your pm to me. Unfortunately for you, when someone posts here asking a question or for advice, people usually attempt to help, thereby making it our business.
I dont know you and therefore will not make personal attacks about your character. That in my opinion is uncalled for and does not make for a healing recovering environment, which SR is SUPPOSED TO BE. Is it supposed to be trolling grounds for vulnerable women? I must have missed that sticky.
I do not believe a word of anything you say and have the right to base an opinion about you based on the information given. Having said that, I hope Jenna sees what I see. I dont think I need to elaborate what exactly that is, as its blatantly apparent through your words to everyone.
Good luck with your anger problem.
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