CodeMaster

On sober recovery, I was looking for a quote to show my new healthy friend round here who hangs out with me or else I'd be lonely as heck. In searching for the quote which I never found, I ran into so many of my postings, all the way from first post to everyone wishing me well and to have fun.

I saw myself go from pains, sadness with great anger to calming down and sad to the day I posted I've broken all contact with my ex to myself making new determinations to make it well in life again and everyone wishing me well and telling me its time to have fun to seeing myself smile and laugh again posting pictures of those alcoholic cats hahaa.

At that time, when everyone posted, I had no clue who anyone was but after getting to know many of you, as I read back and recognize many of the names and how heartfull peoples posting were, I was moved by the deepness of the postings and I was suprised at how many were going through similar experiences as mine at the same time and sometimes I see them make postings today and I thought theyve been through this hardship a long time ago, but when I read these familiar names who had sad endings in their relationships as recent as mine, I was suprised many on here today that I am familiar with are actually as new as I am. But when I read peoples postings on here daily, I feel like sometimes I'm one of the only new ones but its almost as if many are going through the same journey at almost the same time and it was suprising to me and comforting.

I also felt a great sense of gratefulness to so many people from all over the world, I think the fine postings from such fine minded people on this forum allowed me to believe in myself again and I cant help but feel gratitude to everyone who takes the time to stop and read and post because these posts I tell you are precious priceless sharing of love and though I still feel sad sometimes when I think back or read a all too similar story, I would have to thank you all, thank my experiences, because I would never be in such a happy life today had things not turn out the way it did.

I think I deserved to have been banned but so many were only so sympathetic to me even though I was so angry. Too many people have touched and moved me to thank.

I did have one person whom I recognized I was very wrong to, I re-read his first posting to me, it contained humility and sympathy and no attack, but I was too angry and anyone who was an alcoholic I flamed without justification. I would have to say DanerousDan I'm very sorry for how I always replied to you, I was so angry at every alcoholic and I can tell by re-readnig all the postings you made, you never intended to flame me or attack me and you were with all sincerity trying to help and I was all too blinded by my anger.

I feel remorse for my anger and I am sorry and I hope I did not hurt your life in any way, I'm sure your much too thick for someone like myself to get under your skin, but in any case, I'm sorry and its in my heart to tell you this.

Loves to all, its an ever changing journey in life and one thing we all have on this forum in common is we are striving for the light and we are all the same and I believe Destiny hears peoples prayers on here and these prayers have saved my very life.

Thanks to all.

Dan

There's growth in anger, dude.
I remember you coming in as well.
I learned things about myself that night.
You pissed me off. But it wasn't about me, after all, eh?
It's all good, Code

minnie

I remember that night too. You got a real butt-kicking if I remember. I also remember the day the lightbulb came on and how delighted I was for you.

Your story is what SR is all about for me - self-discovery and support whilst I am meandering down that road.

Glad you're here.

Dan

I've been called worse

susane1408

Beautiful!!
This is what SR is all about.

GettingBy

That's awesome Code! I haven't always gotten in the thick of your posts, but I've read, listened, and prayed for you! You've really come along way.

Keep on keepin' on!!

:-) Shannon

CarolD

Awww Shucks CM! You made me cry!

on down the recovery road!

gelfling

Cause we love ya Code.

Cynay

Wow how sweet is that

Progress not perfection

cwohio

you always posted exactly what you were feeling at the time - no punches pulled, but were also always quick to admit when you were wrong or didn't agree with but accepted someone elses point of view. you've really come a long way and i've enjoyed reading about your journey.

i think one of my favorite posts was when you went to the dr. and asked about therapy - i still remember the remark about the miniskirts and the little smiley face after that remark!

thanks for sharing the journey code!

hugs - christie

CodeMaster

Thanks, I was telling my healthy friend today all about everyone on here and I sent her a few postings that had so much meaning in it and she was blown away by how deep / meaningful postings on here were and said how lucky I was to have people take time out to write such meaningful postings to you. She is always so blown away by the postings from here she saves them in a word document hah. She said destiny musta felt sorry for me and sent a lot of help my way cause I really needed it hahaa

Though reading these stories from time to time on this forum really hits home, I will never forget and I hope everyone may lives out their most impossible dreams and I look forward to our future journey together.

Loves always to all...

Zoey

Thanks code..Keep comming back.

sunshinebluesky

i dont know how i would have gotten thru my last five months without this forum and all the people on it. not in a good healthy way,im sure. sometimes i read and i dont agree,sometimes i read and i think someone is being really quite sh*tty in their reply, but EVERY time i read,i get SOMETHING good for ME. even when im not looking for anything!! as my life goes on,there may come a time when i am here less,but i think i will always be here-------------------where many good people are.

pmaslan

Thanks Code...so glad you are here with all of us.....
(((Code)))

CodeMaster

I look forward to seeing all have an incredible journey forward together, when one falls, many will be there to pick up, whether by internet, or the Spirits sent by Destiny and heck who knows, maybe run into a few of you someday.

Loves always
CodieMaster

cwohio

maybe one of those Spirits of Destiny might be wearing a miniskirt

(you know i'm never going to let you live that down, right - LOL)

thanks code!

FormerDoormat

Now, now, Christy, don't get Code started....

Code, that was a beautiful post. It just confirms what I already knew--you are a very special man.

CodeMaster

mmmm! I certainly hope so!!!!