Venturing out on my own...I'm scared!
too much on my plate!!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: not kissing frogs anymore
Posts: 646
Venturing out on my own...I'm scared!
Tomorrow I take a big step, well at least it is for me. I'm going to take a three hour drive to the area that I want to move to and check out some apartments. I'm so nervous!! This will be the first trip I've made alone without xabf in over two years. I'm so used to him doing all the planning and being so bossy about where he wants to stay and what he wants to do. 
I'm hoping I will be able to afford this move; although it looks like right now I'm a little short on cash. I'm praying to my HP that I will find a way to do this. Like so many of you have said, the money thing usually works itself out; I hope in this situation it does!! Because I'm almost broke.
I've wanted to move back for the last few years. I have threatned xabf so many times when he started his drinking, gambling and not coming home that I would leave him and move back to the state I'm from; but like most of us codies, I gave him a dozen chances. Now I hope I can do it this time on my own.
I'm both nervous, scared and excited all at the same time!! Hope my car will make it this time around.
I'm hoping I will be able to afford this move; although it looks like right now I'm a little short on cash. I'm praying to my HP that I will find a way to do this. Like so many of you have said, the money thing usually works itself out; I hope in this situation it does!! Because I'm almost broke.
I've wanted to move back for the last few years. I have threatned xabf so many times when he started his drinking, gambling and not coming home that I would leave him and move back to the state I'm from; but like most of us codies, I gave him a dozen chances. Now I hope I can do it this time on my own.
I'm both nervous, scared and excited all at the same time!! Hope my car will make it this time around.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Lancaster
Posts: 120
Just keep thinking positive thoughts and everything will be okay. Traveling alone can be a very soothing and peaceful thing. Think of it as three hours all to yourself - how often do you get that??? I hope you find a place and can make the move.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: coral springs florida
Posts: 8
You can do it
Hi, I am also in the same position i have moved out and on and believe it or not as a man so used to having someone around helping or hindering as the addiction got worse I am a bit scared being on my own but peace and a future unknown but without all the baggages and abuse and manipulation and lies of addiction will be worth it. You will find inner peace and rest Good Luck!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Litterbox City
Posts: 5,691
have a wonderful trip - i usually try to play some of those mood cd (ocean waves with music, etc.) which is very soothing. you will have a wonderful adventure! have a safe trip and let us know when you get back!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: uk
Posts: 3,054
Sounds like a good excuse to go cd shopping to me!!
I'm into world music (ie all four corners of it) when I go on a long journey I see how many continants I can listen through!!
Your whole post sounds like a changing tide in your life - enjoy every moment!!
I'm into world music (ie all four corners of it) when I go on a long journey I see how many continants I can listen through!!
Your whole post sounds like a changing tide in your life - enjoy every moment!!
Member
Join Date: May 2005
Location: brighton england
Posts: 13
savana54. hope it all went ok yesterday.
im not used to taking the controll either.i didnt even know how to pay a bill a while ago.someone else had always done it for me.
im going to spain on my own with my son.no partner with me.so ill heve to take charge wont i.practice makes perfect.practice makes perfect.love ali.
im not used to taking the controll either.i didnt even know how to pay a bill a while ago.someone else had always done it for me.
im going to spain on my own with my son.no partner with me.so ill heve to take charge wont i.practice makes perfect.practice makes perfect.love ali.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: north east
Posts: 58
I truly hope everything went well for you.
I too have called it quits with AH. Thank God I am still am in the house that I own. It will be tough to stay here by myself.
I too am a scared as He$$. I just have to be strong and think okay- things will get better. I HAVE to think that now!!! I do not know that but I have to think that! If I can not do this then I know I wil have to sell. I do know in my brain that selling is better that living with an abusive drunk. My heart just wants to keep living here.
You have my prayers and best wishes
I too have called it quits with AH. Thank God I am still am in the house that I own. It will be tough to stay here by myself.
I too am a scared as He$$. I just have to be strong and think okay- things will get better. I HAVE to think that now!!! I do not know that but I have to think that! If I can not do this then I know I wil have to sell. I do know in my brain that selling is better that living with an abusive drunk. My heart just wants to keep living here.
You have my prayers and best wishes
Member
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Second star to the right....
Posts: 845
i was so moved by your post and wanted to send you a big reassuring hug.
It's exciting and nerve racking for me to do such big things which i can find are so grown up and all that but the more i grow in recovery i realise i am a real, valid, responsible adult.
blessings to you
It's exciting and nerve racking for me to do such big things which i can find are so grown up and all that but the more i grow in recovery i realise i am a real, valid, responsible adult.
blessings to you
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