Do you ever just feel like running away?
I used to work here ;)
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: I live in Trevose, PA & collect Barbies :)
Posts: 2,024
Do you ever just feel like running away?
Hey all 
Well, my neice's mother came and got her at the school bus today and took her to their house for dinner, what a shock. They also had an appointment with a housing group today so maybe they will be finding something soon. Thats the good news.
Bad news is, I guess the A had too much responsibility and decided to take a break. I came home to an empty house, a case of beer in the kitchen and no sign of the A. And guess what? The friggin lawn mower was out front again!! I kid you not!!
So now I am not sure what to do. The case of beer only has a few out of it but lord only knows if he was drinking something else. Not sure if I should even let her mom bring the child back, if he is going to come back here drunk.
I talked to him a couple times today and he seemed okay. Said his back was bothering him and he was just taking it easy. I just feel like running away from it all....if its not one thing its another.
Is it a full moom? Usually the stuff always happens when its a full moon.
Oh well, thanks for letting me vent. Not sure what I am going to do next. I need to think.
Talk to you soon.
Many hugs.
Love,
Debbie
Well, my neice's mother came and got her at the school bus today and took her to their house for dinner, what a shock. They also had an appointment with a housing group today so maybe they will be finding something soon. Thats the good news.
Bad news is, I guess the A had too much responsibility and decided to take a break. I came home to an empty house, a case of beer in the kitchen and no sign of the A. And guess what? The friggin lawn mower was out front again!! I kid you not!!
So now I am not sure what to do. The case of beer only has a few out of it but lord only knows if he was drinking something else. Not sure if I should even let her mom bring the child back, if he is going to come back here drunk.
I talked to him a couple times today and he seemed okay. Said his back was bothering him and he was just taking it easy. I just feel like running away from it all....if its not one thing its another.
Is it a full moom? Usually the stuff always happens when its a full moon.
Oh well, thanks for letting me vent. Not sure what I am going to do next. I need to think.
Talk to you soon.
Many hugs.
Love,
Debbie
Guest
Posts: n/a
Deb,
I'm sure you'll do the right thing. It's hard to tell when you don't know what shape your A is in. The last time he left the lawnmower out he didn't come home for awhile.
Have a backup plan just in case and keep things handy for a quick getaway.
I've certainly wanted to run away a few times.
Hugs,
MG
I'm sure you'll do the right thing. It's hard to tell when you don't know what shape your A is in. The last time he left the lawnmower out he didn't come home for awhile.
Have a backup plan just in case and keep things handy for a quick getaway.
I've certainly wanted to run away a few times.
Hugs,
MG
I used to work here ;)
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: I live in Trevose, PA & collect Barbies :)
Posts: 2,024
Well, I put the lawnmower out back and I know for certain that beer wasn't the only thing he bought today so he is definitely out on a binge.
I told her mother to keep her tonight in case he came home "stupid" because the child doesn't need to see this on top of everything else she is going through.
So here I am alone, seething at his irresponsibility and still wishing I could run away from it all.
Tomorrow is another day and I will worry about it when it gets here. I plan to let my guys out and go to bed soon.
Thanks for being her ladies and letting me vent. It helps just to get it out. I guess it is helping since some of the anger is leaving although I think I would punch him if I saw him right now.
Oh well, I may be in and out. I can never sleep when he is out on a tear.
Talk to you all later.
Many hugs.
Love,
Debbie
I told her mother to keep her tonight in case he came home "stupid" because the child doesn't need to see this on top of everything else she is going through.
So here I am alone, seething at his irresponsibility and still wishing I could run away from it all.
Tomorrow is another day and I will worry about it when it gets here. I plan to let my guys out and go to bed soon.
Thanks for being her ladies and letting me vent. It helps just to get it out. I guess it is helping since some of the anger is leaving although I think I would punch him if I saw him right now.
Oh well, I may be in and out. I can never sleep when he is out on a tear.
Talk to you all later.
Many hugs.
Love,
Debbie
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Barbiedeb
It is heart breaking to see you go through this again. I am beginning to develop an aversion to lawn mowers. I agree with MG - keep your emergency plan ready, and get some rest if you can. You have been through so much and if you can, just turn this one over to your Higher Power. He is always there with you.
If you can get to some meetings, it would probably help you too. Learning how to work the 12-steps can save your life - I know because it saved mine. And WE are worth it girl!!!!!
We're here for you all night and please feel free to vent away. You are not alone tonight.
It is heart breaking to see you go through this again. I am beginning to develop an aversion to lawn mowers. I agree with MG - keep your emergency plan ready, and get some rest if you can. You have been through so much and if you can, just turn this one over to your Higher Power. He is always there with you.
If you can get to some meetings, it would probably help you too. Learning how to work the 12-steps can save your life - I know because it saved mine. And WE are worth it girl!!!!!
We're here for you all night and please feel free to vent away. You are not alone tonight.
Paused
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Denton Texas
Posts: 92
Resource
While you are up and down tonight and surfing, try a site I used this w/e when I was trying to deal with my insanity. Its Christians in recovery. They have thoughts, and scriptures in lots of different topics. Peace, be still. God speaks when we are quiet. Try to find some. I'll check in before bed....
Member
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: That's what I'd like to know.
Posts: 2,416
Hi BD!
They make "the club" for automobiles... do you think they work on lawnmowers? HP must have been watching to have your neices Mom pick her up unexpectedly. At least that part worked out. Have you thought about changing the locks?
Hugs,
Smoke
They make "the club" for automobiles... do you think they work on lawnmowers? HP must have been watching to have your neices Mom pick her up unexpectedly. At least that part worked out. Have you thought about changing the locks?
Hugs,
Smoke
Guest
Posts: n/a
That is a good idea Smoke.
I think we should all have 2 sets of door knobs. One set when it's ok for them to have a key and one set when it is not ok. It only takes a few minutes to change them back and forth. We can just make them think they were to drunk to get the door unlocked and they will probably believe it.
Hugs,
MG
I think we should all have 2 sets of door knobs. One set when it's ok for them to have a key and one set when it is not ok. It only takes a few minutes to change them back and forth. We can just make them think they were to drunk to get the door unlocked and they will probably believe it.
Hugs,
MG
No More Mrs. Nice Guy
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Iowa
Posts: 724
Love it!
You can also unplug the garage door opener if you have an automatic one. It's easier and less stressful than changing the code.
Too bad you couldn't just have a duplex and make them go their own side if you didn't want them in!
LOL
Hugs
Osier59
You can also unplug the garage door opener if you have an automatic one. It's easier and less stressful than changing the code.
Too bad you couldn't just have a duplex and make them go their own side if you didn't want them in!
LOL
Hugs
Osier59
I used to work here ;)
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: I live in Trevose, PA & collect Barbies :)
Posts: 2,024
Good Morning
Well, I actually slept if you could call it that, I think I coughed every 15 minutes. I should be a joy in work today
I like changing the lock idea but I know with him where there is a will there is a way. Great idea also about unplugging the garage, I would do that if I had a garage lol He called when I was just falling asleep telling me him and his friend were at the mall and walking home. He might have been looking for ride, yeah like I would have picked him up. He said him and his friend got arrested because his friends car wasn't legal, oh well - thats the kind of stuff that happens when you need to drink and drug. The only thing he admitted to was drinking a couple of beers. He said he didn't have anything else, I don't believe him. With his track record who would?
Anyway, him and the friend came to the house and they have been in the basement. They will probably come up when I go to work. Not sure how the friend is getting home. Better not look to me for a ride. Let him call a cab.
Oh well, nothing I can do. I need to think about my neice and maybe this situation will light another fire under her parents butts. They knew my situation when they sent her here and it was only supposed to be a month. We shall see.
I will update you later. I am going to drink my coffee and enjoy a few free minutes before work.
You all have a great day.
Many hugs.
Love,
Debbie
Well, I actually slept if you could call it that, I think I coughed every 15 minutes. I should be a joy in work today
I like changing the lock idea but I know with him where there is a will there is a way. Great idea also about unplugging the garage, I would do that if I had a garage lol He called when I was just falling asleep telling me him and his friend were at the mall and walking home. He might have been looking for ride, yeah like I would have picked him up. He said him and his friend got arrested because his friends car wasn't legal, oh well - thats the kind of stuff that happens when you need to drink and drug. The only thing he admitted to was drinking a couple of beers. He said he didn't have anything else, I don't believe him. With his track record who would?
Anyway, him and the friend came to the house and they have been in the basement. They will probably come up when I go to work. Not sure how the friend is getting home. Better not look to me for a ride. Let him call a cab.
Oh well, nothing I can do. I need to think about my neice and maybe this situation will light another fire under her parents butts. They knew my situation when they sent her here and it was only supposed to be a month. We shall see.
I will update you later. I am going to drink my coffee and enjoy a few free minutes before work.
You all have a great day.
Many hugs.
Love,
Debbie
Supply Manager
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Cleaverville
Posts: 2,898
(((Debbie)))
What a pain in the %$#&!!
Oh well...it sounds like you have pulled out and dusted off that ol' survival kit. Keep it polished... you will be needing it.
Trust me...he knows what you are thinking...so save your voice and your energy to use elsewhere. Let him muddle through being mad at himself instead of you.
Hugs,
JT
What a pain in the %$#&!!
Oh well...it sounds like you have pulled out and dusted off that ol' survival kit. Keep it polished... you will be needing it.
Trust me...he knows what you are thinking...so save your voice and your energy to use elsewhere. Let him muddle through being mad at himself instead of you.
Hugs,
JT
Grace Under Fire
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Another world
Posts: 536
Hi Deb,
Sorry you are going through this, hope-
fully the little girl's parents will get
their act together, and that will be one
down for you. Hang in there, we are all rooting for you!
(((HUGS+PRAYERS)))
Sorry you are going through this, hope-
fully the little girl's parents will get
their act together, and that will be one
down for you. Hang in there, we are all rooting for you!
(((HUGS+PRAYERS)))
I used to work here ;)
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: I live in Trevose, PA & collect Barbies :)
Posts: 2,024
Hey All
Well I am a mess. I came home to meet the child at the bus stop and the A was passed out in the bed with a bottle of vodka next to him (old habits die hard, I dumped it!!), and he was pissed and I didn't care. His A friend was passed out on my sofa. He screamed at me (my A) and I tried to remain calm but he kept it up so I lost it and screamed back. The bottom line is he can't understand why I care more about my nephews daughter than his grandkids. Guess what I have seen his grandkids a total of 3 - 5 times since they have been born. I spoil them when they are here but they live in Ohio, they probably don't even know who the hell I am. That I want to spoil a little girl in a bad situation is something I am allowed to do. He was all for it in the beginning until the month turned out to be longer. I guess he had a month set his mind for sobriety and it was cramping his style, who knows.
Anyway, I called my neices mother and told her she was going to have to take her. I could not subject that little girl to him in this state and that I would pack up her stuff and bring it to wherever she wanted me to bring it. I then came home and attempted to do just that and the A decided he wanted to fight with me again. I just don't have the energy to fight. I am angry but so sad too. I am sitting here unable to stop crying....maybe its what I need. I guess I needed to vent also.
Oh well, thanks for listening. I think I am going to get her stuff together and have a real good cry while doing it.
Talk to you all later.
Many hugs.
Love,
Debbie
Well I am a mess. I came home to meet the child at the bus stop and the A was passed out in the bed with a bottle of vodka next to him (old habits die hard, I dumped it!!), and he was pissed and I didn't care. His A friend was passed out on my sofa. He screamed at me (my A) and I tried to remain calm but he kept it up so I lost it and screamed back. The bottom line is he can't understand why I care more about my nephews daughter than his grandkids. Guess what I have seen his grandkids a total of 3 - 5 times since they have been born. I spoil them when they are here but they live in Ohio, they probably don't even know who the hell I am. That I want to spoil a little girl in a bad situation is something I am allowed to do. He was all for it in the beginning until the month turned out to be longer. I guess he had a month set his mind for sobriety and it was cramping his style, who knows.
Anyway, I called my neices mother and told her she was going to have to take her. I could not subject that little girl to him in this state and that I would pack up her stuff and bring it to wherever she wanted me to bring it. I then came home and attempted to do just that and the A decided he wanted to fight with me again. I just don't have the energy to fight. I am angry but so sad too. I am sitting here unable to stop crying....maybe its what I need. I guess I needed to vent also.
Oh well, thanks for listening. I think I am going to get her stuff together and have a real good cry while doing it.
Talk to you all later.
Many hugs.
Love,
Debbie
No More Mrs. Nice Guy
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Iowa
Posts: 724
Aw Debbie
a great big hug from me. Wish I could do more!
Even in the short time you had her, you made a difference in that little girl's life... and maybe you will have more opportunity in the future. Right now concentrate on taking care of you. Don't feel too bad about the slip. We all do it...
Progress, not perfection. THANK GOD
Hugs
Osier59
a great big hug from me. Wish I could do more!
Even in the short time you had her, you made a difference in that little girl's life... and maybe you will have more opportunity in the future. Right now concentrate on taking care of you. Don't feel too bad about the slip. We all do it...
Progress, not perfection. THANK GOD
Hugs
Osier59
Guest
Posts: n/a
Debbie,
I'm so sorry. I wish things could be better for you.
It's bad enough that your A is putting you through this, but having another passed out on your couch is pushing it.
Maybe you could continue to work on that plan and make some changes.
Have a good cry and take a hot bath and get some rest.
Hugs,
MG
I'm so sorry. I wish things could be better for you.
It's bad enough that your A is putting you through this, but having another passed out on your couch is pushing it.
Maybe you could continue to work on that plan and make some changes.
Have a good cry and take a hot bath and get some rest.
Hugs,
MG
Grace Under Fire
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Another world
Posts: 536
Deb,
Well, you have done everything you could,
and M.G.'s right-maybe you can make a
plan now. We all care about you and love
you. Try to take care of yourself, you
are such a good person and deserve the
best.
(((BIG HUGS)))
Well, you have done everything you could,
and M.G.'s right-maybe you can make a
plan now. We all care about you and love
you. Try to take care of yourself, you
are such a good person and deserve the
best.
(((BIG HUGS)))
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
****{Barbiedeb}}}
They sure don't like sharing attention, and I think that this just stinks. I am so sorry for what you are going through and hope that life gets better for you really soon.
It is probably a little traumatic to give back the little girl like this, but maybe this is God's time for that too. I know she will always remember what a wonderful aunt she has.
And as for the guy on the couch.....OUT!!!! You can tell him I said so.
My prayers are with you.
They sure don't like sharing attention, and I think that this just stinks. I am so sorry for what you are going through and hope that life gets better for you really soon.
It is probably a little traumatic to give back the little girl like this, but maybe this is God's time for that too. I know she will always remember what a wonderful aunt she has.
And as for the guy on the couch.....OUT!!!! You can tell him I said so.
My prayers are with you.
Last edited by Ann; 10-08-2002 at 02:46 PM.
It is what it is!!!
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Sobriety
Posts: 5,767
Oh Deb -
You can tell him we all said to get the h#$% out!!!!!
And you sure did see this coming, I am so sorry.
You neice will remember always what you did for her, I know that in my heart.
As for the A, and today that does not stand for addict if you know what I mean (oops I didn't say that)!!!
Take care of yourself, do something good for you tonight and just ignore him.
(((Hugs from CA)))
You can tell him we all said to get the h#$% out!!!!!
And you sure did see this coming, I am so sorry.
You neice will remember always what you did for her, I know that in my heart.
As for the A, and today that does not stand for addict if you know what I mean (oops I didn't say that)!!!
Take care of yourself, do something good for you tonight and just ignore him.
(((Hugs from CA)))
I used to work here ;)
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: I live in Trevose, PA & collect Barbies :)
Posts: 2,024
Hey all
Thanks for all the kind words and encouragement. I really needed it. I am better now.
His A friend left when he heard us fighting, what a wuss, didn't even know he left.
I guess I am already missing the child. Geez its quiet. I had myself a good cry while I got some of her stuff together but boy does she have a lot of stuff
I am telling myself I did the best I could while I had her and our time together has come to end. I think we will have to make weekend plans together and that will be fun. I am just so sad
I was hoping for a better adjustment for her when she left her but now she is in another crazy situation but at least there are no drugs and alcohol around her.
Anyway, thanks again for listening and caring. I love you guys
Many hugs.
Love,
Debbie
Thanks for all the kind words and encouragement. I really needed it. I am better now.
His A friend left when he heard us fighting, what a wuss, didn't even know he left.
I guess I am already missing the child. Geez its quiet. I had myself a good cry while I got some of her stuff together but boy does she have a lot of stuff
I am telling myself I did the best I could while I had her and our time together has come to end. I think we will have to make weekend plans together and that will be fun. I am just so sad
I was hoping for a better adjustment for her when she left her but now she is in another crazy situation but at least there are no drugs and alcohol around her.Anyway, thanks again for listening and caring. I love you guys
Many hugs.
Love,
Debbie
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