Ok, Here is my plan...(Rubbing hands together)
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Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Recoveryville, USA
Posts: 1,297
Ok, Here is my plan...(Rubbing hands together)
Im gonna kill him with KINDNESS and POSITIVITY!
Yes, I know it sounds dastardly. I know it;s a novel idea, that I couldnt possibly pull it off, but............
so far it;s working.
When getting hit with angry words and blame, I respond with "Sorry you feel that way" and then detach, physically or otherwise.
When hit with "I refuse to hear your messages or read your emails, you are dead to me", I leave a message (Anyhow) saying "Im sorry if you chose not to listen, but we have a child issue to discuss(Then leave the issue on voicemail). End it with "Have a nice day").
No smarmy slang in my voice, no vindictivness, no sarcasim. No, Im taking a different path this time.
It must be working, cus he seems darn frustrated with not having someone to spar with. Seems that if his spark doesnt have oxygen to fuel it, he doesnt know what to do???
His reactions seem kinda desperate, attacking and threatening,,,HEY! Isnt that MY job? Thats what I used to do as the frustrated al-anon, not getting the response that I wanted. Hmmmm...I think I may be onto something here..Kindness? Calmness? Ohhhhhhh who woulda thunk it??
Yes, I know it sounds dastardly. I know it;s a novel idea, that I couldnt possibly pull it off, but............
so far it;s working.
When getting hit with angry words and blame, I respond with "Sorry you feel that way" and then detach, physically or otherwise.
When hit with "I refuse to hear your messages or read your emails, you are dead to me", I leave a message (Anyhow) saying "Im sorry if you chose not to listen, but we have a child issue to discuss(Then leave the issue on voicemail). End it with "Have a nice day").
No smarmy slang in my voice, no vindictivness, no sarcasim. No, Im taking a different path this time.
It must be working, cus he seems darn frustrated with not having someone to spar with. Seems that if his spark doesnt have oxygen to fuel it, he doesnt know what to do???
His reactions seem kinda desperate, attacking and threatening,,,HEY! Isnt that MY job? Thats what I used to do as the frustrated al-anon, not getting the response that I wanted. Hmmmm...I think I may be onto something here..Kindness? Calmness? Ohhhhhhh who woulda thunk it??
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