Julie1016

I've told you all how my mom started drinking again 1-1/2 weeks ago, and I haven't spoken to her since. Well i talked to my sis tonight and she mentioned that she had spoken to my mom today. I asked her if she asked about me or said anything at all as to me calling or not calling her as the case may be. I also asked my brother when I talked to him on Sat. Seems she is not even asking about me. She hasn't asked anyone if they've talked to me or anything. Well I really have NO plan on calling her anytime soon, but at the same time it sure would be nice to know she was at least ASKING about me. Kwim? I mean normally her and I are fairly close and we talk at least 3 timea a week, and most weeks it's more like 5 times per week. Well I guess I'll leave it alone. Maybe see how long it takes before she breaks down and decides to call me. or hell maybe she really doesn't give a crap. Hell she still isn't really dealing with the issue. Ya know, I can't even begin to tell you all how badly I wish I just never had to deal with any of this bull ever again. I told my sis, a part of me wishes she HAD died a week and a half ago, at least then i would of had the pleasure of having nearly the last year and a half of knowing her sober. I am just SOOOOO tired of it all. :-(

mushroom

You're trying to hurt her and she's not responding. How aggravating. Time to detach! Are you not talking to her to punish her for drinking? Or because you really don't want to deal with her when she's drinking? You decide.

Julie1016

Honestly? Probably a little of both. I mean she's my mom, I love her dearly, and whenever she has came to visit me(she stays for a week or more each and every time-when we lived in PA it was a month long visit most times) but we've always had fun together. I mean sure I wrote her the letter telling her how badly she hurt me, but you would think she would at least ask someone how I was. Sometimes I wish I could just forget she exsisted. It's hard as hell on me to not pick up the phone and call her but I HAVE to stick to my guns on this one. One of the problems is that everyone, including myself always forgives her too dam easily and in no time at all we're all back to acting as if nothing happened and she didn't drink. I feel if I don't speak to her for awhile it'll make her face reality a little more. Is that foolish thinking? UGH...I don't even know anymore. I think I am starting to over analyze everything lol. I think too much...that's what dh tells me at times lol.

cupowater

Calling her does not mean that you accept her behavior. She Is human, and we are not perfect. I'm not making excuses for her. I would just hate to see a bigger wedge then should be there driven in. Just something to think about.

cwohio

i agree - calling her does not condone her behavior. if you have a boundary in place - something like you won't speak with her when she is drunk - that might help. my stepdaughter will not come over or talk to her dad when he is drinking. unfortunately, that means she hasn't been over much lately.