quietsins

its time to move on. i can feel myself dying inside being around him. the constant lies, the half truths, the alcoholism.

i just cant seem to find any reason to be around him. i know i have gifts, talents, good friends and intelligence. he is my weakness. he is my addiction. he is my worst habit.

i cannot save him. i cannot lead him to recovery. and stopping drinking without recovery is useless. it just leads to more lies, and more heartache. more pain.

i see his friends and realize they have two things in common. all of them drink like fish and all of them have busted up relationships.

so why do i feel the overwhelming sense of loss and guilt?

sigh,
quietsins

JennyK

And that is why you have to work on yourself.

Focus ALL of your energy on what you CAN save. You can save your sanity. Go with that....it will come quickly.

Post more and read a lot. Tons of smart people on this site.

Jenny

bluester

"i can feel myself dying inside being around him". Quietsins first a big hug(((((((((()))))))))))). Know this is very hard for you to deal with. I understand completely..I have the same type problem. You mentioned...the constant lies, the half truths, the alcoholism. My AH won't admit he has a problem..so the half truths...the alcohol...the depression...lack of sex..and the rest that go with this are something I cannot change. As much as it hurts me..I have no other choice but to move on,heal myself and live my life..the way it is meant to be. My AH has to deal with the problems he has..I cannot control him..change him or live his life for him.
You can go to AlAnon...read past posts on forum. Think you will find alot of very smart people who have had the same type problem you have. Keep posting and know you aren't alone in this.

JT

The alcoholic hangs on to the bottle and we hand on to the alcoholic. There is no truer definition of codependence in my opinion.

We reach out and take action when WE are sick and tired of being sick and tired. Fortunately there is help available and tools to use.

Hugs,
JT