cupowater

I may be reading this wrong, but ever since my AH invaded my privacy and read my posts, he has been extra nice to me. On two occasions, he brought me a drink. (double shot of whisky) when I really wasn't in the mood to drink! One of the times was last night. I took a sip, and then let it sit on the end table the rest of the night. He finally drank it before he took off to the bar. I was wondering if maybe he is trying to get me to drink so he won't feel so bad about himself. But maybe he IS trying to just be nice.

The OTHER thing he did, which didn't even dawn on me untill the day after, was that we went out to dinner, and he had two or three drinks, and then drove home!!!!! Might not sound too weird to you, but ever since he got his DUI 4 years ago, he won't even get behind the wheel in our own DRIVEWAY if he even SNIFFS alcohol! That is weird!

walkingtheline

that I will NOT ride with my BF if he's had anything to drink. If I miss the signs before I get in the car, I get out as soon as it's safe to do so. As far as I'm concerned, you can drink OR you can drive, but you can't do both!

cupowater

Yes, this is true. It just never dawned on me because I am so used to him NOT drinking and driving!

rivercitybelle

That is strange... to change so suddenly in regards to the driving issue.
Maybe in a strange way he's trying to show you he's "changed"... that he is a social drinker who can "control" it and that he can be "nice" rather than "nasty" when drunk... hmm... just thoughts

splendra

Maybe your H thinks if you join him you will leave this silly posting bit behind you. It sounds to me like it hit a nerve for him to read your post and that he is worried.....

You said he drank the drink he poured for you and then took off for the bar, is the bar within walking distance? You say he doesn't drink and drive.....

I think he is getting ready to try to teach you a lesson so be aware.....

JessicaNAJ

I agree with Splendra - maybe it's just b/c of my experiences, but I think I'd be on guard / who knows though he could be sincere. You know him best.

cupowater

Rivercitybelle, yes I thought about that. But that is so strange because oddly enough, he is "Mr. Morality" when it comes to EVERYTHING in his life! (but he is an ALCOHOLIC!!!) He usually stands by his principles! I find the whole thing very ironic!

Splendra, yes, I very much agree with what you said:
"Maybe your H thinks if you join him you will leave this silly posting bit behind you. It sounds to me like it hit a nerve for him to read your post and that he is worried.....

You said he drank the drink he poured for you and then took off for the bar, is the bar within walking distance? You say he doesn't drink and drive.....

I think he is getting ready to try to teach you a lesson so be aware....."

Yes, the bar is withing walking distance. You can even SEE it from our house. It's like a "Cheers" place. Everyone knows everyone! Funny thing is, he used to say it was just a place for all the looser drunks in the neighborhood! Hmmmmm.......
I think he is trying to prove something too! I NEVER let my guard down. How's THAT for a way to live with a "spouce" (especially when he is my X spouce!!!)

nocellphone

It all sounds a bit creepy to me, cupowater.

"Here, honey! Have some of the same poison I've been killing myself with for years! I poured it for you myself..."

Intoxicated... toxic... poison...? And then driving not only himself but you home while under the influence?!? Eeeeeeeeeeeek!

As the disease progresses...

wraybear

Before my AH decided to "not" drink, 8 years ago, he would make me a drink occassionaly. I know it was when he thought I had PMS or something. It was his way of saying "here, you NEED this."

There are times when a drink just sounds good. But, in his mind, he thought I needed a drink to relax or not be in a bad mood.

I guess that's what addicts do... you have to have a drink to relax. Can't relax without a drink. Need to get in a good mood, a drink will surely help. The addicts mind is baffling.

Maybe he thought you wouldn't be as upset or say anything, etc if you had a drink in you before he left for the bar. But, of course, I always suspect an alterior motive, but there may not be in your situation.

cupowater

You know Wraybear, I think you're right! Cause he always says, Here, this will put you in a better mood. One day I came home from work not feeling good, and he gave me a shot of whisky!!!!! Oh yes! THAT will make me feel MUCH better on my upset stomach!!!

zoe

Cupowater, that last comment made me chuckle. But sarcasm has always been my favorite also.
Everything you said would turn on my suspicion. Be careful and take care of yourself.
Zoe

cupowater

Oh, I forgot one other thing. One Saturday morning, he said something about drinking some honey and whisky for his bronchitis!!!!! He NEVER drank in the morning before!

cupowater

I almost made a comment about "hair of the dog", but I kept my mouth shut!

minnie

If you weren't in the mood to drink, why did he bring you a drink? And please don't take this the wrong way, ut why did you accept it and have a sip? My ex used to pour me a glass of wine without me asking and it used to wind me up. I think he just wanted company whilst he was getting drunk. Don't get me wrong, I like a glass of wine (in fact, I've got one in front of me now!), but on my terms, not those of an alcoholic.

Be careful.

Love

Minnie
xxx

cupowater

Well, I thought I might go ahead and drink it, but then changed my mind.