dread going home!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: MN
Posts: 103
dread going home!
OK some know my story and some do not.....I will sapare some of the details but my A is on house arrest for a DUI from last year. He has been on since the week after Christmas and will be on until mid March. I firmly beleive he will go right back where he left off when he is released from his time.
at any rate I have been trying to be supportative and detach..work on myself and do things for myself.....
well last night I asked what his plans were for Sat...he says NOTHING WHY? I said I think I am going to go to my sisters....then he starts in ...(no matter where I go or what I am doing, I MUST be doing something wrong!) Needless to say he expects me to stay home with him etc.........I didn't agree and I told him so...he proceeded to rant and rave ...he hung up on me then calls and acts like nothing....but of course I am irritated with him so am short with him , he starts in again!
So now today agian he calls like nothing ever happened then asks me how he is going to get to AA if I go to my sisters??? Well I had no idea he was going to AA (treatment is making him apparently), was I supposed to just know this I asked? then it started AGAIN, at how selfish I am and that I don't care blah blah blah!!! You guys I have to say ...I chose NOT to entertain him I just said if that is how you feel then that's fine...I have to go , said good-bye and hung up!
He doesn't work tonight therefore will be home...I have no desire to get into it with him.......and know that he is just going to make the night horrible. Do I get the kids and leave? go home and ignore? or go home and lay it all out on the table?
he says he is leaving when he is done with the house arrest ....my comment to that was WHY wait until you are done?? (that didn't go over too well!)
thanks and sorry about the length......really looking for some opinions or what has worked for any of you!
at any rate I have been trying to be supportative and detach..work on myself and do things for myself.....
well last night I asked what his plans were for Sat...he says NOTHING WHY? I said I think I am going to go to my sisters....then he starts in ...(no matter where I go or what I am doing, I MUST be doing something wrong!) Needless to say he expects me to stay home with him etc.........I didn't agree and I told him so...he proceeded to rant and rave ...he hung up on me then calls and acts like nothing....but of course I am irritated with him so am short with him , he starts in again!
So now today agian he calls like nothing ever happened then asks me how he is going to get to AA if I go to my sisters??? Well I had no idea he was going to AA (treatment is making him apparently), was I supposed to just know this I asked? then it started AGAIN, at how selfish I am and that I don't care blah blah blah!!! You guys I have to say ...I chose NOT to entertain him I just said if that is how you feel then that's fine...I have to go , said good-bye and hung up!
He doesn't work tonight therefore will be home...I have no desire to get into it with him.......and know that he is just going to make the night horrible. Do I get the kids and leave? go home and ignore? or go home and lay it all out on the table?
he says he is leaving when he is done with the house arrest ....my comment to that was WHY wait until you are done?? (that didn't go over too well!)
thanks and sorry about the length......really looking for some opinions or what has worked for any of you!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: a state of unrest
Posts: 383
oh shel I am so sorry you have to go through this, mine is the same way no matter what I am doing I'm probably doing something wrong!!!
I think you should get the kids and go to a dollar movie, that's my new fav thing to do. Although seeing things like shark tales and fat albert is getting a little old, but anything is better than listening to the rambelings of an A.
take care and go have fun tonight
mindi
I think you should get the kids and go to a dollar movie, that's my new fav thing to do. Although seeing things like shark tales and fat albert is getting a little old, but anything is better than listening to the rambelings of an A.
take care and go have fun tonight
mindi
Member
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: out of town
Posts: 85
What do YOU want to do? What will bring peace to your mind. Sometimes we spend so much time planning, worrying, calculating a response that we lose ourselves. The answer is usually right in front of us. BE Selfish and go with it. Do something nice for YOU. It feels really good.
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