And I was doing so good...
Survivor
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Proud Upstate New Yorker
Posts: 869
And I was doing so good... I feel so low today. So incredibly sad. I guess that bill for those damned keys I lost will be coming soon. I asked the residential life office how much it would be yesterday and of course they didn't know. They never know. They said it may be around $400.00 or a lot more.
So, I am sick of the financial stress with this pending bill that no one seems to know how much it is. I really need the rest of the money that came from that check from financial aid but I am going to have to use it to pay that damn bill. I need some new boots real bad and a lot of my underwear is ripping these days. My jeans are going to pieces. I need more thick socks. I need a damned bookbag. My cell phone charger broke yet again so I have to get a new one. But I cant get these things all because of some damn keys. I wish my family was more supportive, I wish they would help me but I know they wont. I can never turn to them and I hate that. I hate that so much. Why cant I have a family that cares? Why must I have this alcoholic family that is so warped that it doesn't realize that children need support, even if they are in college. Just because your kid goes to college doesn't mean your job is done.
I wish I had someone I could talk to about all of this but no one ever knows what to say. When I reach out to people, they either dont know what to say or choose that moment to give me tough love. As if I hadn't had enough tough love in my life. I am so sick of being the person to give other people encouragement and then not having anyone to really turn to. I dont want to cry in front of anyone because it is so awkward and like I said, no one ever seems to know what to say.
I wish things didn't have to be this way. I am so tired of struggling financially and emotionally. It is so hard to deal with college all alone without real familial support.
~Def
So, I am sick of the financial stress with this pending bill that no one seems to know how much it is. I really need the rest of the money that came from that check from financial aid but I am going to have to use it to pay that damn bill. I need some new boots real bad and a lot of my underwear is ripping these days. My jeans are going to pieces. I need more thick socks. I need a damned bookbag. My cell phone charger broke yet again so I have to get a new one. But I cant get these things all because of some damn keys. I wish my family was more supportive, I wish they would help me but I know they wont. I can never turn to them and I hate that. I hate that so much. Why cant I have a family that cares? Why must I have this alcoholic family that is so warped that it doesn't realize that children need support, even if they are in college. Just because your kid goes to college doesn't mean your job is done.
I wish I had someone I could talk to about all of this but no one ever knows what to say. When I reach out to people, they either dont know what to say or choose that moment to give me tough love. As if I hadn't had enough tough love in my life. I am so sick of being the person to give other people encouragement and then not having anyone to really turn to. I dont want to cry in front of anyone because it is so awkward and like I said, no one ever seems to know what to say.
I wish things didn't have to be this way. I am so tired of struggling financially and emotionally. It is so hard to deal with college all alone without real familial support.
~Def
Member
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 4,955
(((Def)))
I'm sorry you're feeling financial strain.
It's tough to keep our spirits up when we're wondering how we're going to pay for it all, you know?
But somehow, we manage.
And somehow, we get though.
Sending some light your way,
Gabe
I'm sorry you're feeling financial strain.
It's tough to keep our spirits up when we're wondering how we're going to pay for it all, you know?
But somehow, we manage.
And somehow, we get though.
Sending some light your way,
Gabe
getting stronger
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Ontario
Posts: 31
I understand your frustration, you are not alone your friends at sr are with you. You can possibly get boots at a resale shop jeans to. Perhaps you may be able to pay your bill in installments. You can talk to school councillers or local govt. agency, go to a meeting . One day you will look back at these hard times and be real proud of yourself it's the journey you are on, Stick to your goals and your path dont get bumped off. Be strong and focused and your goals they will pay off in the end. Hugs Rock
{tap}{tap}...Is this thing on?
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Getting There
Posts: 276
Def,
Hello Darling. I'm sorry that you're having such a rough start to the year. Have you checked out your on-campus counseling services? I have a friend who works for the counseling services at one of our colleges here in NC. I told her that I wished I had known about these services when I was in school, just to have someone to talk to when I was overwhelmed. She made me laugh when she commented, "The counseling services are more widely existant now than when we were there..." - I am that old (I guess!)
I've heard about no-cost/low-cost loans or emergency loans that some colleges have available. I would talk to the folks that know and see what they can recommend.
You never know what might come of this...your HP has a reason for everything, it just hasn't been revealed yet.
Hugs and warm thoughts are coming your way - Peace. Petunia
Hello Darling. I'm sorry that you're having such a rough start to the year. Have you checked out your on-campus counseling services? I have a friend who works for the counseling services at one of our colleges here in NC. I told her that I wished I had known about these services when I was in school, just to have someone to talk to when I was overwhelmed. She made me laugh when she commented, "The counseling services are more widely existant now than when we were there..." - I am that old (I guess!)
I've heard about no-cost/low-cost loans or emergency loans that some colleges have available. I would talk to the folks that know and see what they can recommend.
You never know what might come of this...your HP has a reason for everything, it just hasn't been revealed yet.
Hugs and warm thoughts are coming your way - Peace. Petunia
Member
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Litterbox City
Posts: 5,691
((((def))))) cry - i have kept mine bottled up for so long i almost can't do it and that's bad, bad, bad. definitely see if you can pay a little at a time - they have to realize lots in college are on a limited budget.
let me know where to send some thick socks!
let me know where to send some thick socks!
{tap}{tap}...Is this thing on?
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Getting There
Posts: 276
Def,
Have you investigated New York State Higher Education Opportunity Program (HEOP) -
http://www.college-guide-nys.org/Fin...ships.htm#heop ?
or
New York State - Regents Professional Opportunity Scholarships
A scholarship program open to NYS residents, these awards range from $1,000 to $5,000 per year, based on need, for up to four years of full-time study in approved programs (five years in specified programs). You must agree to work for one year in NYS in the profession studied for each year of scholarship aid received. Economically disadvantaged minorities are given top priority. Contact your school counselor for additional information.
Use all means available is my strategy....
P
Have you investigated New York State Higher Education Opportunity Program (HEOP) -
http://www.college-guide-nys.org/Fin...ships.htm#heop ?
or
New York State - Regents Professional Opportunity Scholarships
A scholarship program open to NYS residents, these awards range from $1,000 to $5,000 per year, based on need, for up to four years of full-time study in approved programs (five years in specified programs). You must agree to work for one year in NYS in the profession studied for each year of scholarship aid received. Economically disadvantaged minorities are given top priority. Contact your school counselor for additional information.
Use all means available is my strategy....
P
Survivor
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Proud Upstate New Yorker
Posts: 869
*sigh*
I found out that the bill is going to be $350.00. That is a lot better than "Oh, $400.00 or a lot more...dum de dum..." I was freaked out by that.
I should be able to pay it but gosh it is going to be a pain in the butt.
I am feeling a little bit better now, hopefully I will be able to overcome this sadness by the time I am finished with my classes today. I know I can.
ETA:
Thanks for the link Petunia, I will check that out.
Thank you so much for the support. I love you guys and I cant wait till I find a face to face al-anon support group.
~Def
I found out that the bill is going to be $350.00. That is a lot better than "Oh, $400.00 or a lot more...dum de dum..." I was freaked out by that.
I should be able to pay it but gosh it is going to be a pain in the butt.
I am feeling a little bit better now, hopefully I will be able to overcome this sadness by the time I am finished with my classes today. I know I can.
ETA:
Thanks for the link Petunia, I will check that out.
Thank you so much for the support. I love you guys and I cant wait till I find a face to face al-anon support group.
~Def
Member
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Carrollton, Texas
Posts: 218
Awww lil darlin...I am so sorry that your day started out like this. But look how many people took time to let you know how important you are to them. PM me darlin...let mom know where to send a care package and it will be on it's way. Don't give up love. To many of us are here for you. And remember, like someone else said...a good cry is a good thing. Let the tears sweep the nastyness out.
Hugs to you my dear.
Hugs to you my dear.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Starting over all over again
Posts: 4,426
Heya Def!
Sorry to hear about your woes. Life can really suck sometimes. I woulda answered sooner but I was at work.
(Can you believe that, this ex-wino, ACA, stressed out codie with a bum ticker actually got a job?!?! Now that's a miracle * lol * )
So you want your family to bail you out with money? How much is that going to cost _you_ in terms of self-esteem? My "toxic family" never gave me anything without using it against me. Being _independent_ of them in all ways is what did the most good for me. I wasn't able to be emotionally _free_ until I was first physically free.
So if you get in a money bind tell 'em you'll pay it off on installments. Either they take the instalents or they get nothing cuz you aren't no Ivana Trump. It's their choice if they want their money.
Me, I'm never selling my soul to the crazy people in my biological family. Not for anything in the world. I'll go back to living in a trash dumpster before I go back to being emotionally crippled by their head games. I've got my self respect, and my dignity, and I'm not giving that up for nothing.
Hang in there Def, your HP is right there with you and everything will work out in the long run. Everybody here loves ya and is sticking with you. 'tis a much better family here, you know ;-)
Mike :-)
Sorry to hear about your woes. Life can really suck sometimes. I woulda answered sooner but I was at work.
(Can you believe that, this ex-wino, ACA, stressed out codie with a bum ticker actually got a job?!?! Now that's a miracle * lol * )
So you want your family to bail you out with money? How much is that going to cost _you_ in terms of self-esteem? My "toxic family" never gave me anything without using it against me. Being _independent_ of them in all ways is what did the most good for me. I wasn't able to be emotionally _free_ until I was first physically free.
So if you get in a money bind tell 'em you'll pay it off on installments. Either they take the instalents or they get nothing cuz you aren't no Ivana Trump. It's their choice if they want their money.
Me, I'm never selling my soul to the crazy people in my biological family. Not for anything in the world. I'll go back to living in a trash dumpster before I go back to being emotionally crippled by their head games. I've got my self respect, and my dignity, and I'm not giving that up for nothing.
Hang in there Def, your HP is right there with you and everything will work out in the long run. Everybody here loves ya and is sticking with you. 'tis a much better family here, you know ;-)
Mike :-)
Wipe your paws elsewhere!
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 3,672
You know it's not every day that Super Broccoli Man comes to the rescue of a damsel in distress. And it's hard for a gal to step up to the plate and offer advice when a super hero has already come to your rescue. But as you can see from my avatar, I'm a fat black and white super canine with a curly tail. Here in Petropolous, I'm called Pigman. I have super powers too, you know. I can send good thoughts your way faster than a speeding bullet. Watch out, here they come!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Starting over all over again
Posts: 4,426
[QUOTE=FormerDoormat]
... Super Broccoli Man comes to the rescue of a damsel in distress...
[QUOTE]
* lmao *
I dunno if I a guy with a green, lumpy face, blue spandex tights and red boots is really anybody's idea of a hero ;-)
The good news is that I'm offering to help a _healthy_ friend with a wonderfuly positive outlook on life, instead of a helpless emotional leech that will drag me down. I'm learning how to be a better person and be supportive of folks who can themselves be supportive of me, as all you fine people have proven on more than one ocassion :-)
Hey! This is the 21st Century, ya know? A gal can be super hero too! Just check out Halle Berry in "CatWoman" (although I think Michelle Pfeifer has done a much better job as both a cat _and_ a wolf :-)
yeah, I've noticed that about codies. We may be sick in some areas of our lives, but I have never met people with as much love and kindness in their hearts as I have on this forum and in real life meetings. No wonder everybody gravitates towards codies, you all are truly admirable people.
Mike :-)
... Super Broccoli Man comes to the rescue of a damsel in distress...
[QUOTE]
* lmao *
I dunno if I a guy with a green, lumpy face, blue spandex tights and red boots is really anybody's idea of a hero ;-)
The good news is that I'm offering to help a _healthy_ friend with a wonderfuly positive outlook on life, instead of a helpless emotional leech that will drag me down. I'm learning how to be a better person and be supportive of folks who can themselves be supportive of me, as all you fine people have proven on more than one ocassion :-)
Originally Posted by FormerDoormat
... And it's hard for a gal to step up to the plate and offer advice when a super hero has already come to your rescue.
Originally Posted by FormerDoormat
... I have super powers too, you know. I can send good thoughts your way faster than a speeding bullet. Watch out, here they come!
Mike :-)
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