pmaslan

OK Last week I wrote about the exA calling to blame me for losing his job. A few days later I found out he hadn't lost it yet but was on his way of losing it. Last Friday I went to the flop house hotel he has been staying at since XMas Day. When I found him he was near death. I couldn't believe this was my once very handsome, together man. He looked like a derilect (sp?) his eyes were wild, skin color terrible and god did the room smell. There were empty vodka bottles all over the place. He told me he was at the end of his rope, couldn't go on like this any longer and told me of his plans to kill himself the following day. He actually had all of his belongings packed up it was very creepy! I brought him back something to eat as it had been days since he had eaten. After talking to him for awhile I realized he doesn't really want to die, he just doesn't want to go on living like this. So, as you probably guessed, I brought him home with me, let him drink most of the weekend and finally yesterday he begged me to take him to the hospital. He is now in the detox unit for the next 3 days. After that, I pray, to the 30 program. This is what he wants, I have not asked him to do this. When I dropped him off at the hospital he was crying like I have never seen before, he was truly a broken man. I don't know what will happen between us after the 30 day program. I have not closed the doors to him but my eyes are wide open. He said he loves me more than anything in the world, so much that he now can face this addiction. I want to believe him but I have been through this detox thing with him 7 times last year! I don't know if he would have killed himself, but I am really glad that something told me to go check on him. The point is: He is now in detox because he wants to be there without my pleading and coaxing. I am going to take this one day at a time and use the time to look to my hp for guidance. This truly is a roller coster ride but the ride does eventually stop if we want it to.

hope2bhappy

I think what you did was very compassionate. I especially liked the part where you "let" him drink all weekend. You were strong enough to allow him to wallow in his disease by himself. You didn't reach into the pit to pull him out -- he reached for you as he climbed out. Your experience has touched me.

I pray for his recovery and that God give you continued strength and patience to handle your situation in such a wise way.

Gabe

You have absolutely nothing to be embarassed about.
Prayers out for your husband that he's on the road to recovery.

Jenee

Don't be embarassed. Ultimately, you have to be able to look at yourself in the mirror and feel that you did what was right for you.

Much love and strength to you as you get it all sorted out.

CrazyRed

Applause to you!!!!
'Everything happens in perfect order for a divine reason'.

You rock!

JT

I am stunned by your strength and compassion.

And Jenee...you are right. We do have to be able to look at ourselves in the mirror.

JT

Ann

I too think what you did shows true compassion as well as a lot of courage.
My prayers go out for both of you.

Hugs
Ann

Dee at Mt Bully

Very courages and very compasionate--I hope for your AHs sake that he really can do
it. It really sounds like you let him make the decission. Good for you. Prayers--Dee

pmaslan

Wow, thank you everyone...I guess I do not give myself muck credit these days. I have done so much rescuing in the past year I just assumed that this was what I was once again doing.
Love, Patty

KATIE77

wow. You truly are an amazing woman. I hope he sees it through this time for BOTH of your sakes and you can enjoy the happy future you deserve. Keep strong. You know it is going to be a long and rocky road but every journey starts with that step. Whats more HE wants to do it. I wish my AB would make the decision!. You are in my prayers. Good luck

cwohio

(((patty))) - there is caretaking and then there is human compassion. you were given the knowledge to know the difference! may this be the start of better days for both you and your ex. prayers are with you!

JessicaNAJ

Your post gave me goosebumps. It's a good feeling.

You are a wonderful person.

Good luck to you and your A.

(((Patty)))

DefofLov

((((huggies))) and prayers for you and your AH, i hope things work out.