aliz05

When my sister told us that she suffered from depression and we discovered she also had a severe alcohol addition and drinking problem, we suggested that she (27) move back home and get help. It has been close to two years, and she has had extensive psychiatric care and addiction support group help. While the emergency room visits have lessoned (after the rehab that followed the dwi charge and car total), she continues to binge drink and she barely works part time (she has an unusually kind boss). My father is planning on asking her to make preparations to leave his home. It tears him apart to watch her hurt herself drinking and he feels he is not helping her. She can easily spend the day drinking as she has no need to be active and financially responsible (no rent or even grocery bills as has always been the case for any of the children temporarily at home). She has discussed suicidal feelings all along (the absolute threat of this we can not really gage). She certainly would have great difficulty suddenly working full time and renting an apartment in expensive NYC. While her drinking is obviously killing her, I worry that she will certainly fail in the world by herself. While I agree with my father, I am terrified for her. I suggested that he offer to send her to another (hopefully better) rehab, but he thinks that would be a waste of a lot of money and she would not allow it to help her. Any feed back is very welcomed. Many thanks.

Bobb B.

see this message board

http://www.addictionrecoveryguide.or...oard/index.php

jalacola

I am the wife of an A, so I will post my thoughts/opinions. My husband is 30 years old. We have 2 children. Toward the end of last year, I asked him to move out. His sister, who also has their mother living with her, told him that he was welcome to stay with her provided he didn't drink. He has also been to rehab, so has all the tools necessary to live a sober lifestlye. He lived there for a month. Nothing change. If anything, it was worse b/c he was enabled. Not on purpose, but living there, he was able to escape reality, responsibility, etc. I thought it would be a wake-up call for him and he would miss us terribly, but instead he got to do what he wanted and rarely be griped at for it. I have informed them all that there is a good chance of another separation, more permanent, and have asked them all if they could refrain from giving an invitation to live with them. He needs to be out having to pay his own bills, wash his own clothes and fend for himself. Basically, he needs to have to pick his own butt up after falling down and not have anyone help him. While this is hard, it is important that we all realize that there is NOTHING we can do to make an alcoholic/addict stop--it has to come from within them. It seems as though your sister living at home is doing nothing but causing added stress on the rest of your family. It may be time to take control of your lives and leave the rest to God.

aliz05

Your comments and links are helpful. It is hard of course to watch someone hurt themselves, but when you are involved because of a living situation it is very confusing. The help is needed.