Waiting to Exhale

Old 01-02-2005, 08:11 PM
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Waiting to Exhale

Things are going quite well for me. Today my AB received his 30-day coin (is that the correct term?) at AA. Pulled it right out of his pocket and showed it to me when he got home. I don't ask him what happens at his meetings or what he's feeling after working the program for 30 days. I've learned that it's none of my business. Still, sometimes he shares a bit with me. I don't ask questions or interject any comments; I just listen to what he has to say and I’m thankful for the feedback I receive.

I'm beginning to see a change in my AB, and I like what I see. Yesterday, he spent quite a bit of time on the phone arranging rides for himself to and from his AA meetings (prior to that, I’d been driving him to his meetings). He said, "I'm trying to make things easier for you." I think that shows that he's beginning to consider my needs and take responsibility for his own recovery.

My daughter, AB, and I have been home on vacation all week. It's winter break for my daughter at school and our company gives us a week off each year between Christmas and New Year's Eve. So, my AB and I have been spending a lot of time together.

I've been waking up to the smell of coffee brewing, breakfast cooking on the stove, the dogs walked and fed their breakfast, the Christmas tree all lit up, and a boyfriend that says "good morning." I'm even getting kisses goodnight.

When he's not attending meetings or helping around the house, he's been immersed in reading his AA literature and calling his sponsor or other group members.

I believe the changes I see in my AB are a direct result of him taking charge of his recovery and me making a concerted effort to stop trying to control his behavior, allowing him to live his life as he chooses, and learning to detach and let go. But mostly, I believe the changes I see in my AB are a reflection of the changes I’ve made in myself.

The change in him is so encouraging. I know it may or may not last. But I’m learning to take one day at a time and enjoy what I have today. Today, I’m in a good place and I no longer feel as if I’m waiting to exhale.
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Old 01-02-2005, 08:17 PM
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And bless you for this post.

Many prayers to you and your family.

Jenny
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Old 01-02-2005, 08:24 PM
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I am so happy things are going so well for you. It gives us all a little hope that things could always be different if our AH's are willing to go the extra distance.

It's good news on a gloomy day.
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