Going Against My Parents Isn's Easy
 

Hi everyone. I have been having a rough time making a very important decision in my life. I am a senior as most know. I have been accepted to Ashland University. The is where I really want to go. My parents say no. It cost too much and i have to stay at home. Yes I lve my family but I want t get out of here. I have lived with my alcolholic dad for almost 11 years and i want to be able to be on my own and prove to myself first and then my parents that i can make it on my own. ALl I have ever hear from them that i will not amount to anything and all the negative crap. I want to go to collgeg and make something out of my life. I don't want to be where my parents are right now. Dead end jobs that pay nothing. Ia m 19 and i make more then my mom does right now at my job. That to me is sad. I want to become something and i want to help others. Ashland cost 25,000 dollars a year and that is a problem. I don't want to be in that much debt even after the scholarships and stuff but this is my dream to go to coolege. I weant to go but at what cost to me money wise and the emotional cost to my family because I will be going against them to follow my dreams. Can anyone give me any words of encouragement so I do not give up my dreams so I do not have to fight with my family.
LOve,
Shana, 19 high school senior

Thanks Def I know I have to go and not give up it is just hard at times to keep my head up but I am still keeping my head up. I know I can make it through college and I do what to live on campus not just to get away from my parents but to meet new people andhave better friends thenI do now. I know there will be counseling there andi will use it because I need something like that I have had my counselors at my school for the past 6 years so I need a support group like that and I will hopefully be able to find a new Al-Anon group there too. Things will work out in the end If I just leave it up to my Higher Power. Thanks for the encougement and i will let you know how i am doing
Hugs and love your way,
Shana

Renee,

Your HP will be there for you, you are right. But you also have to do the work yourself. Sometimes we have to be proactive in our choices and I am a huge believer in young woman doing everything they can to not ever be dependent. NOT EVER BE DEPENDENT.

You go!!
JT

Hi Renee. Follow your dreams. Go to Ashland and worry about the money later. If your parents are low income, you're eligible for a lot of financial aid. There are also a lot of scholarships out there that don't have anything to do with your GPA in high school. The first thing to do is talk to the financial aid office at Ashland and get signed up for all the financial aid that you're eligible for. Most universities have work study programs and you would be able to work part time at the university as well as go to school.

One thing that many people don't realize is if they are under 24, the school automatically considers them dependent and they will insist on having copies of the parents tax returns for financial aid. If your parents haven't claimed you on their tax returns for 3 years, you're considered independent and they will base your financial aid on your income, not your parents. I didn't claim my younger son from the time he was 18 so now that he's 22, the school he goes to gives him financial aid based on his salary. If they based it on mine, he wouldn't get any.

Do it as quickly as possible because financial aid takes months to process and you want the money to be there when school starts.

School is hard enough without dealing with the crap at home. You deserve a fresh start. Renee, I have to tell you that from the start I've been impressed with your maturity and your positive outlook. You have your head on better than many of us that are years older. You know what's right for you and you can't let your parents negativity affect your life any longer. You will probably have to fight your family for what you want. Keep your eye on the dream and don't let others get in your way.
Karen

go renee - the folks above have said it all!

Renee, I agree with the crowd here. Go to college, its a great experience that will last a lifetime. You can do it!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks everyone for your input and I am going to schudle a vist at Ashland to talk to the financial people there very soon like first week in January. Thanks for the information about financial aid opptions from Karen. That stuff I did not know. I wioll go for my dreams but like you guys said I will have to fight for but I think i am ready with all of your support now.
Thanks, Love,\
Shana

Dearest Renee,

Follow your heart and your dreams. All of it will be taken care of. Lots of times we do things we can't afford, but we manage to see our way through it. Our Hp is always there and will see you through everything.

Never allow anyone to take away your most precious thoughts. You'll lose control and can kiss everything goodbye.

Go for it. We're rooting for you and will keep you in our prayers.

Blessings, kathy

Renee,
You go girl! Wow, you are at a level of maturity most so called adults will never see. I know of Ashland and it has an excellent reputation and I am betting that you will get in and with scholarships and loans, you can do it. You do not have to pay back student loans until you are out of school, and by then, you wil be making money in the career you have chosen.
Do you have a close adult friend who can be your emotional mentor? Or a teacher? Give it a try.
We want to see you suceed and get out there and be the woman you were meant to be. You know all those things ( negative) you are hearing from your mom are lies. This sounds silly, but even at age 48, I still draw back to the old kids phrase, " I am rubber, you are glue, what bounces off me, sticks to you!"
Keep us posted and God Bless!
:funjump:

Thanks guys that really made me more positive about this college process. JUst having some debts but I will keep going. Thanks for all your guys support.
Shana