Don't know what to do
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Join Date: Mar 2021
Posts: 1
Don't know what to do
Hello, I am new to this forum and really just looking for any words of advice or support. My husband is an alcoholic. He went through rehab a few years ago, and stayed sober about a year. Things deteriorated over time, and I told him he needed to do something, so last summer he went to rehab again, but because of covid, they only kept him for detox, and then send him home after 2 days. It wasn't long before he was drinking again. I feel like over time drinking has eroded him, and he isn't the same person he used to be. I can't see myself staying in this situation for the rest of my life. What I really feel is that I need space, room to breathe, I wish there was somewhere else he could go just so I could let my guard down and relax and just try to gather my thoughts about things...but there isn't anywhere for him to go. I don't want to kick him out and then have him be homeless. I honestly don't know what to do. The stress has not been good for me or the kids, and I don't know if this will ever end.
I don't want to kick him out and then have him be homeless.
Why don't you look at getting some legal advice and see where that takes you.
As you probably know you can't force him to change. All you can do is look after your childrens' and your own welfare.
Being forced to live elsewhere wouldn't be a bad thing for him, ya know? I'm sure he's pretty resourceful.
Hi Gwynn, and weIcome. s
I am a recovering aIcohoIic, 6+ years now. Gosh this disease puts a Iot of strain on reIationships....to say the Ieast.
If it was me, I wouId ask him to go to rehab, fuII on again now. Things are open again. And he needs to decide if he wants to get weII or to Iose his famiIy.
Just my thoughts Iove. xx
I am a recovering aIcohoIic, 6+ years now. Gosh this disease puts a Iot of strain on reIationships....to say the Ieast.
If it was me, I wouId ask him to go to rehab, fuII on again now. Things are open again. And he needs to decide if he wants to get weII or to Iose his famiIy.
Just my thoughts Iove. xx
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Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 573
Alcoholics are incredibly resourceful people. I know I was when I was drinking. I could be dead broke and still find a way to drink. Your husband would find a way to survive if you kicked him out. It may even wake him up. My ex tossed me out and that may have been the only thing that got thru my thick skull. You and your kids come first. If he wants to be a drunk, let him figure it out on his own. You deserve better. I know it stinks. Hugs to you.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Western US
Posts: 8,999
Welcome Gwynn. I'm so very glad you found us. May you find lots of support here.
There is a book that is a bit of a bible around here. It is called Codependent No More. Also you might look into Alanon Meetings. They aren't for everyone but for some they are a life saver.
Relationships with alcoholics are semi-impossible and the correct thing to do is not intuitive. It really is a brutal situation to be in.
Peace and courage to you.
There is a book that is a bit of a bible around here. It is called Codependent No More. Also you might look into Alanon Meetings. They aren't for everyone but for some they are a life saver.
Relationships with alcoholics are semi-impossible and the correct thing to do is not intuitive. It really is a brutal situation to be in.
Peace and courage to you.
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