Recovery and Menopause?

Old 12-03-2004, 11:57 AM
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Recovery and Menopause?

As some of you know from my other posts, my ASIL is staying with us for a while to get her act together. She is 48 and is going through what appears to be a pretty rough menopause. She is constantly hot, and when she has a hot flash it's even worse. She's so hot at night she doesn't sleep, plus she's really moody as well. When I asked her what her doctors have recommended to help her symptoms, she said they told her she would just have to live with it. Is this really the prevailing wisdom? I started looking into alternative therapies, and see that exercise, anti-depressants and certain herbs (black cohosh, wild yam, soy, and some others) are recommended for symptom management. They also recommend avoiding spicy foods and alcohol (of course!)

I think her severe menopause symptoms, combined with her current lack of a recovery program, could really hinder her recovery. From what I've read, it appears she could be considered a dry drunk. Does anyone have any experience or recommedations for me? Thanks.
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Old 12-03-2004, 12:52 PM
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hopeful2 - that's got to be be like a double whammy! i also have symptoms and was on hormones which took care of it but then out came the studies that they were bad, bad, bad and i went off of them. i still have hot flashes and don't sleep well which i'm sure, hinders MY recovery. i tried the black cohash, soy, wild yam and they did not help me, but they may help her.

i may end up going back on lower dose hormones for a short while - it just absolutely saps your strength.

good luck and hope others have some tips for you

cwohio
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Old 12-03-2004, 01:55 PM
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Hi, i can only speak about "myself" here.Im an alcoholic.If you said this to me,when i was actively drinking that you thought that something,or anything would hinder my recovery,i would certainly agree with you.if i wanted to continue to drink.I would have agreed with anything,long as another left me alone to drink..Of course id be lieing to you.Im going through menopause.i have cancer,too.And im sober,through God,s Grace.Living in programs one day at a time.I take no med,s as of today..Both are hard ,,for sure.I pray/meditate.This is what is helping me..Im aware.So,i try to keep a positive attitude.Menopause is natural.Both illness has not been,or are they in the way of my, soberiety,living working the programs..God has done for me,what i cannot..
Thank you for letting me share,,
God Bless,,take care...
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Old 12-03-2004, 02:07 PM
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I can only speak to the menopause but not the recovery of the addict. I am 37 and had a complete hysterectomy in March. My doctor immediately put me on hormones (the lowest dosage possible) so that I never had any symptoms (only a few mild hot flashes at first and sometimes when I don't change my patch at the right time). I currently wear a .1 miligram patch and it's working well. We discussed my options and he told me about the studies and the risks and I felt the benefits much outweighed the risks. I chose the patch because the hormones are not processed through the liver (or is it kidneys?) like oral medicines are. He also told me that the dosage of standard birth control pills are about 7 times higher than standard hormone replacement for menopause. (and we don't have a problem with birth control pills?? go figure...)

It took me a few months to feel regulated and not feel like I was fine one minute and wanted to rip someone's head off the next. Although, that could have been caused by my AH..... and then him asking me if I had changed my "bitch patch" didn't help either. (ha ha ha)

Anyway.... I don't think that women should have to go through menopause being miserable. Some do just fine without hormone replacement and others need it.
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Old 12-03-2004, 08:05 PM
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Hmm. I wonder. It's hard for me to imagine a physician saying that when there are so many things that can me done now. I think "they said there's nothing to be done" might translate to "I'm too stupid to ask" or "I like being miserable, back off do-gooder." Somebody told me to eat a lot of soy products. I was skeptical but at least theres no harm in it. Worked for me. There's bound to be something for her. However, I would just let her suffer. If she wants relief she needs to bestir herself and find it.
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Old 12-03-2004, 09:21 PM
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I had a hysterectomy last year at the age of 35~
I had some problems and had to go off my pills for almost a month~
I became suicidal~I ended up going on zoloft for a while as well..When your body is low in estrogen..You will become depressed have headaches,mood swings//etc...the whole nine yards~I would say my best advice for her would be...Go find another doctor A.S.A.P~~
She can take some vitamins..she will need calcium .I take one b vitamin pill everyday..It is a b vitamin complex 100 pill..I get mine at the drugstore and buy their brand..This is working good for me~.You can take melatonin at night to help you sleep~
She can try the estroven pills over the counter but there are only small amounts of things to help you in those~
Please tell her to find another doctor soon~
Also i have to tell you about this wonderful site i found right before my hyst..Even though she is in nat menopause and not surgically induced menopause..This site is a big help for all your questions from a-z..
Its called hystersister.com..
I hope things calm down soon for everyone in your home as im sure this is no fun for any of you~
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Old 12-03-2004, 09:39 PM
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I'm not sure she told you everything her Dr. said. I'm 53 menopasal and have AH. My
Dr. said there are minimal risks--the supposed new study did not talk about all the issues and estrogen therapy can help resolve problems other than hot flashes and mood swings. It also helps with bone loss. I certainly would not give up my premarin.
Thinking daughter should revisit Dr. or another Dr. I also agree with city girl--lots of
info on the web. Good luck to you--sounds like a handfull---Smiles--Dee
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Old 12-03-2004, 10:04 PM
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a couple of yrs ago my dr told me, as long as you are on the pill, you'll have a period. that day I quit taking mine (no sense in taking them) had maybe 2 periods since and a few warm to a little hotter flashes. He wanted me to take the test for hormone replacement. But I thought if it doesn't get any worse than this, I wouldn't want to take it anyways. But did go to the gnc and woman clerk, reccomended evening primrose capsules. They worked for me and now my life is hopefully past menopause (I'm 53) and the next step is pause~o~ men....
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Old 12-04-2004, 01:15 AM
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I have found that one of my biggest obsessions is the health of Mr Magic. I worried and fretted about his unwillingness to do the things I thought he should. I was afraid of what would happen to me if something happened to him. I made myself miserable and hard to live with.

Being in Al-Anon, I used the tools that I had been given to work through my issues. I had to realize that his health, as well as his recovery, were his responsibility. If you make someone responsible for something, you don't jump in and take over. You let them work through it. How else are they going to learn?

I also realized that my being upset wasn't helping the situation. I had to detach from his struggles. I had to stop feeling guilty for not being able to fix him.

I still give suggestions and my opinions, but I was told in Al-Anon that saying it once was expressing my feelings. Saying it over and over was trying to control the outcome. In my own experience, when people try to control me, I resent them. I avoid them. I ignore them. Even if they are right, I have the right to make my own decisions, and I have the right to make my own mistakes. Hugs, Magic
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Old 12-04-2004, 10:36 AM
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My menopause is really rough with bad hot flashes at least 2 an hour and really really crabby. My mood swings were horrible! I would prefer to take herbs but they aren't strong enough for my symptoms. I'm on the lowest dosage estrogen and I take prometrium for the first 12 days of the month. The Dr said I'll stop taking them as soon as I stop having periods. I'm down to a period every 2-3 months now and I really wish they would just stop.

Perhaps your ASIL heard something from the Dr that she didn't want to hear so she said they couldn't do anything. There is always something that will help. If the Dr really said that, she should see someone else.
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Old 12-04-2004, 11:27 AM
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Hi Hope,

Jeez.........

There are progesterone creams on the market you can get. Also a GYN/OB can give you a prescription for creams to be made up to whatever strength he feels necessary. You get this filled at compounding pharmacies that can make it up for you.

Another alternative to cooling down. Go outside for a minute. This time of the year should cool her down for a bit.

Kathy
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Old 12-04-2004, 11:40 AM
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I got stuck on the words...hinder her recovery. Does she have recovery? from your posts I don't think so.

but that is the thing...it is her recovery, it is her menapause, it is all hers. When you open your home to someone to help them that is a wonderful gift, but it is still her program and her life to work. She is going to say whatever she wants to the dr.

IMO share with her some of the things such as herbs and things you have learned about, but it is up to her to take them or not. As with her recovery, it is all up to her.

I am an addict myself, blessed to be in recovery. At 31 when I got cleaned I lived back with my mom for the first year, it was not easy. But nothing anyone said to me made a difference, it had to come from me.
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