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Check-in thread, holiday seasons 2019 How are you doing today? Sending good wishes, prayers, etc. for healing, good health and found moments of joy. Years ago I first heard the concept of "it's okay to be happy, even with alcoholism in the family" and "it's good to recognize and allow joy, even when we have grief or pain." |
I think this is a great thread Mango as I know many start planning holidays now and it causes a lot of stress for many. I personally am taking it a day at a time. This year will be extra hard as my dad is in the nursing home. I am going to make sure I enjoy every second that I can, and just try to get through it. Big hugs! |
#hopeful4 #seekingcalm Life is good. Thank you for being here. :grouphug: One day at a time, indeed. Hopeful, how are the conditions at the nursing home your dad is at? How do you feel about the place? |
He is in a very nice nursing home. They are super nice and take good care of him. Some changes were made to his schedule recently which I also feel has been an improvement. So if he has to be in a nursing home, I feel it's a good one, at least there is that. My mom keeps thinking about taking him home for a visit over the holidays. I think that is a nightmare waiting to happen, but ultimately it's her decision and I can only gently give my opinion and help in any way I can. So for today, he is safe and well taken care of, and I am very thankful for that. Thank you for asking Mango! Huge hugs! |
Halloween tomorrow but it looks like a white Christmas outside. I tend more to the grouchy than the merry at this time of year. I may try to get the heck out of dodge in the next few months. Although this will be influenced by my Dad as he is still living independently but needs more care. |
Well, I have to report in. Last night I thought I was doing so well. I took my youngest to dinner, for a haircut, got some new bath and body works stuff, it was all good. You know how you just reach your limit? I realized on my way home I forgot to go to the grocery store. Kid had nothing for today's lunch so I had to go. I go to the parking lot and started crying b/c I was so tired, over it, and it was raining. LOL. I did go in, but man I did not want to. I have a Halloween party to attend at a friend's house tonight w kid. It will be fun but it would be a lot nicer to stay home and watch movies instead. Ugh..... To top it off, it's freezing and raining here today. I did see my first snowflake though. Crybaby signing off LOL...….. |
Crying can be a beautiful release. Even ugly-crying. Emotions flowing rather than bottled up. :D :grouphug: Hang in there! |
The Power of Crying: Tears Heal "It is good to cry. It is healthy to cry. This helps to emotionally clear sadness and stress. Crying is also essential to resolve grief, when waves of tears periodically come over us when we experience loss. Tears help us process the loss so we can keep living with open hearts." Open heart chakra: "The heart chakra for thousands of years has been known as the center of love, unity, and balance. When have you felt open, receptive, forgiving, accepting, generous, and connected to both yourself and other people? This is most likely when your heart chakra is healthy and balanced. Guided meditation: https://themindfulmovement.com/balan...chakra-energy/ So as we pause, allow healthy expressions of emotions and tap into body-knowledge of healing and rejuvenation, self-care becomes a natural part of living. As we care for self first and fill our own cup, we enjoy a changed view of our own worth, value and strength. In weakness we find strength. In caring for ourselves we learn how to more deeply care for others in very healthy ways. |
Thank you for posting this Mango!!! I really needed to read this today. Big hugs! |
Reporting in on Halloween and I have to say it was fabulous! The boys and I left AH home and did our thing! You guys, it was the best! We stayed out until people started turning off lights, we laughed and chatted with all kinds of people. My own huge victory? I didn't apologize for leaving him home or staying out. Here's to happier holidays! BTW- this is the best thread ever! The holidays are such an awful time to be brought down by your alcoholic loved ones. Happy thoughts to you all! |
Living with the effects of a friend or family member's active alcoholism or early recovery, etc. can create an underlying -- or sometimes obvious -- crisis. Especially during the holidays -- it seems to be a time of family and friends turning attention to having more relaxing, warm and kind interactions. Recognizing there is an issue going on is an important part of moving forward with healthy solutions. "Here's how to stay mentally strong during a crisis: Accept reality. ... Seek support. ... Practice self-care. ... Ask yourself what advice you'd give to a friend. ... Create a helpful mantra. ... Prioritize what needs to get done. ... Find time to experience your emotions." |
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I just thought I would check in. Made it through the first Thanksgiving w/ my dad being in the nursing home. It's very sad, he really is going downhill. However, after we visited w/him we went to some other family events and had a nice time. I had to work on Saturday but that's ok. All in all, I am relieved it's past, and I am relieved it was a nice time. How did everyone else do over the holiday? |
Count me in :) Just ordered a tree for delivery this weekend. I feel a little bit better the past few days. I need to hit the books a bit this holiday season but I am grateful to be in a position where I can work flexibly so take some much needed me time :) |
Originally Posted by Mango212
(Post 7299230)
How are you doing today? Sending good wishes, prayers, etc. for healing, good health and found moments of joy. Years ago I first heard the concept of "it's okay to be happy, even with alcoholism in the family" and "it's good to recognize and allow joy, even when we have grief or pain." Recognizing and sharing in appropriate safe spaces the alcoholism/effects/etc. Allowing balance of "staying on my side of the street" along with "breaking family secrecy". Praying for wisdom to know the difference, ability to make use of silence today and willingness to speak up when it's Good Obvious Direction. |
I had a bit of an off day. Just grouchy for most of it. However I motored through some tasks so I'm giving myself credit for being productive. Some of today: Called my Dad several times to get him to drink water called his caregiver company as 2 caregivers came yesterday and none today ran laundry found the ladder I need to change batteries in smoke detectors took a load of trash and recycle to the dumpster added gas fix to the van that will sit most of the winter cleaned out the gutters bought some supplies for the house Cleaning out the gutters was a big accomplishment. I was waiting for all the leaves to come down before I did it and then it snowed. Then I was waiting for the snow to melt but it didn't happen. I had to bite the bullet and go up on the roof in the snow and get 'er done. At least it is a job with a good view. So I'm off to watch the first episode of season 3 of Mrs. Maisel. I have a fire burning and some sewing to do. Soldier on all with what ever comes your way. |
Wow, cleaning gutters in the snow! I would be grouchy too! Why is it everyone I speak to who has to deal with caregivers has scheduling issues?? Goodness how frustrating. I went out of town with my mom, kids, and sister over the weekend for my birthday. There were a few stressful moments, but all in all a great weekend. Good Christmas lights, good food, nice hotel, and some shopping. A few things that have been going on with my kids came to a head and that was something (why do those things happen when we least want them to?), but we got past it and all was well. This week is going to be busy as usual, but less than some weeks. I am going to meal plan for the next two nights as that's a big thing for me. I don't cook many home cooked meals because we are always running. I am also going to watch National Lampoons Christmas Vacation because it ALWAYS makes me laugh. |
Check in: how's everyone doing? |
Happy New Year's day! Yesterday I enjoyed two Al-Anon meetings, an open NA meeting, time with friends and helped at work. Many blessings and good wishes for this day. May we enjoy being centered, balanced and tapped into our healthy intuition. Happy 2020!! |
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