Unbelievable
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Join Date: Jul 2019
Posts: 868
Originally Posted by trailmix 
This makes no sense, are you sure your lawyer knows what they are talking about??
(disclaimer: I am not a lawyer lol).
As long as he has been served then there has to be a provision for him refusing to sign (respond), a legal provision.
Unless you live in some backwater without real laws!
- Person files for divorce >> respondent is served papers >> they have X amount of time to respond. If they don't respond you can file that they have not responded and the case proceeds.
Once that is filed there are no "do overs" - it proceeds whether he says he signed it, was thinking about signing it, the dog ate it or he buried it under the sprinkler system.
These laws are in place for situations like yours, otherwise there would be thousands of divorces pending a husband or wife deciding whether or not to sign a piece of paper.
(disclaimer: I am not a lawyer lol).
As long as he has been served then there has to be a provision for him refusing to sign (respond), a legal provision.
Unless you live in some backwater without real laws!
- Person files for divorce >> respondent is served papers >> they have X amount of time to respond. If they don't respond you can file that they have not responded and the case proceeds.
Once that is filed there are no "do overs" - it proceeds whether he says he signed it, was thinking about signing it, the dog ate it or he buried it under the sprinkler system.
These laws are in place for situations like yours, otherwise there would be thousands of divorces pending a husband or wife deciding whether or not to sign a piece of paper.
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Join Date: Aug 2011
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Sounds like money is your best leverage. Quite often, money talks.
Once he is out of the house, with little cash flow and no backers, it seems unlikely that he would take up a legal contest....that all takes time, aggravation and m..o..n..e..y……..
Once he is out of the house, with little cash flow and no backers, it seems unlikely that he would take up a legal contest....that all takes time, aggravation and m..o..n..e..y……..
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Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 8,637
Originally Posted by Dazedandconfus
he did not respond to original service papers.. Let me check my understanding again. I hope you’re right...
Even so, I would double check the laws for your area.
People don't have to acknowledge being served anything (generally) or everyone would just say I was never served.
It's up to the server to have an affidavit witnessed saying I served this person.
Ok, that's as far as I go with trailmix's legal - ramblings.
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Join Date: Jul 2019
Posts: 868
Originally Posted by trailmix
Ok that is a different matter, actual service.
Even so, I would double check the laws for your area.
People don't have to acknowledge being served anything (generally) or everyone would just refuse to sign and say I was never served.
It's up to the server to have an affidavit witnessed saying I served this person.
Ok, that's as far as I go with trailmix's legal - ramblings.
Even so, I would double check the laws for your area.
People don't have to acknowledge being served anything (generally) or everyone would just refuse to sign and say I was never served.
It's up to the server to have an affidavit witnessed saying I served this person.
Ok, that's as far as I go with trailmix's legal - ramblings.
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Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 8,637
Originally Posted by Dazedandconfus
there is an affidavit from the server...
I mean he could say it but it wouldn't hold water.
Plus, you have already sent back modifications right? Didn't he have to initial or sign with regard to those?
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Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 73
There should be a time limit of when papers are turned in regardless of his signature, then it should turn into a default divorce and it should state he has to vacate by a certain date. You shouldn’t need an additional eviction. My divorce had all that and my ex husband was refusing to sign and made it drag out as long as he could. He did leave by specified date in papers though. It’s a process but it will come to an end
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Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 8,637
That's interesting, just as an aside, here there is no provision for vacating accommodation, that doesn't even enter in to it. I suppose it is sometimes added separately.
Chin up Dazed, he is leaving soon, whether he likes it or not.
Chin up Dazed, he is leaving soon, whether he likes it or not.
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Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: W Washington
Posts: 11,589
thanks Schne!
so the AH is going to drag this out as long as possible, most likely in hopes you will cough up $$ for him to leave. his angle now is to get what he can out of the deal.
see it for what it is. not a mess, not a disaster, not a newsflash - expect it, plan for it, work around it. detach, avoid interactions. do not think you can talk him into or out of anything at this point. he's not hearing you.
so the AH is going to drag this out as long as possible, most likely in hopes you will cough up $$ for him to leave. his angle now is to get what he can out of the deal.
see it for what it is. not a mess, not a disaster, not a newsflash - expect it, plan for it, work around it. detach, avoid interactions. do not think you can talk him into or out of anything at this point. he's not hearing you.
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Join Date: Jul 2019
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WwIII. I told him be at the notary tomorrow to sign the damn papers. The tirade from him included: he was hoping I would change my mind, why can’t I believe in him, he takes divorce as seriously as his vows, he’s an evil rotten person, this is my divorce not his, why do I hate his job, maybe he can have a life now that his doctors release came in, and then he threw the rest of the sprinkler system piece in the table, stormed out the door to fax his papers and left. What happened to the man last night who wanted to make love? I’m in pieces...
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Also how he didn’t mean it when he said he bought the truck to leave, how he’s trying, he’s sorry he was hoping I would change my mind. He sAid he was gonna sign the papers on sept 9....yeah..I told him I hoped and believed for 20 years....nothing changed for me by hoping. This sucks.
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Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Southern US
Posts: 510
Dazed, I'd take the dog for a walk or something. He sounds like a toddler throwing a fit, and when he realizes it's not working on mom he changes tactics.
When he realizes no one is listening, he'll stop the performance.
When he realizes no one is listening, he'll stop the performance.
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Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
So he is pulling out all the stops. Surely you are not surprised by any of this?
I agree. Get out of the house and stop listening to him. Just because he wants an audience does not mean it has to be you. I would look up a number to a therapist and give it to him and tell him to call them and tell them all of this.
I agree. Get out of the house and stop listening to him. Just because he wants an audience does not mean it has to be you. I would look up a number to a therapist and give it to him and tell him to call them and tell them all of this.
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Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,427
So he faxed the signed papers?
I personally would be neither audience nor speak with him until the signed papers are actually sent.
And most likely not then either. This man’s story changes by the minute to see if anything sticks. Pay no heed.
I personally would be neither audience nor speak with him until the signed papers are actually sent.
And most likely not then either. This man’s story changes by the minute to see if anything sticks. Pay no heed.
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Join Date: Jul 2019
Posts: 868
Originally Posted by Hawkeye13
So he faxed the signed papers?
I personally would be neither audience nor speak with him until the signed papers are actually sent.
And most likely not then either. This man’s story changes by the minute to see if anything sticks. Pay no heed.
I personally would be neither audience nor speak with him until the signed papers are actually sent.
And most likely not then either. This man’s story changes by the minute to see if anything sticks. Pay no heed.
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Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: East Coast
Posts: 1,235
Seriously, why are you still talking to him?
However, if you insist on staying, maybe you could make a mental bingo card in your head.
"It's your fault."
"Why are you doing this to me?"
"Give me one more chance."
"@#$#@ you!"
"My family loves you. What am I going to say to them?"
"My family hates you."
"Everybody drinks."
"Why are you throwing our marriage away?"
"Is there someone else?"
You can fill in the rest.
However, if you insist on staying, maybe you could make a mental bingo card in your head.
"It's your fault."
"Why are you doing this to me?"
"Give me one more chance."
"@#$#@ you!"
"My family loves you. What am I going to say to them?"
"My family hates you."
"Everybody drinks."
"Why are you throwing our marriage away?"
"Is there someone else?"
You can fill in the rest.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2019
Posts: 868
Originally Posted by PuzzledHeart
Seriously, why are you still talking to him?
However, if you insist on staying, maybe you could make a mental bingo card in your head.
"It's your fault."
"Why are you doing this to me?"
"Give me one more chance."
"@#$#@ you!"
"My family loves you. What am I going to say to them?"
"My family hates you."
"Everybody drinks."
"Why are you throwing our marriage away?"
"Is there someone else?"
You can fill in the rest.
However, if you insist on staying, maybe you could make a mental bingo card in your head.
"It's your fault."
"Why are you doing this to me?"
"Give me one more chance."
"@#$#@ you!"
"My family loves you. What am I going to say to them?"
"My family hates you."
"Everybody drinks."
"Why are you throwing our marriage away?"
"Is there someone else?"
You can fill in the rest.
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