Curious
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Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Wyoming
Posts: 2,996
Unfortunately he never got it. After seeking my first attempt to recover the 2nd “marriage” got worse and worse. He is still drinking it up. He proudly says he can keep it under control unlike me. I wish him luck. The whole situation is sad. We were steering the Titanic.
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Join Date: Jul 2019
Posts: 868
Originally Posted by lmvalentine 
Unfortunately he never got it. After seeking my first attempt to recover the 2nd “marriage” got worse and worse. He is still drinking it up. He proudly says he can keep it under control unlike me. I wish him luck. The whole situation is sad. We were steering the Titanic.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Wyoming
Posts: 2,996
It was heaven and total hell. 2 alcoholics don’t make a whole person. I’ve read some of your other posts and you are incredibly strong and self aware. An alcoholic will tell you anything to get what they want. Don’t give up and be suckered back in. It’s an endless cycle.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2019
Posts: 868
Originally Posted by lmvalentine
It was heaven and total hell. 2 alcoholics don’t make a whole person. I’ve read some of your other posts and you are incredibly strong and self aware. An alcoholic will tell you anything to get what they want. Don’t give up and be suckered back in. It’s an endless cycle.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: uk
Posts: 2,428
I am still with my AH. We have been together about 15 years. I drank with him for about 6 years and I am sober about 9 years.
I do not regret staying with him. I have an enormous amount of recovery work to do on myself.
I do not regret staying with him. I have an enormous amount of recovery work to do on myself.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: uk
Posts: 2,428
Originally Posted by FallenAngelina
I am not married to my alcoholic. I'm the woman he moved on to. I'm the woman who was supposed to make it all better. Guess what?
I believed all the crap about how his former wife made him drink!
I have learnt such a lot during my time with him. I can't believe now how I fell for all that bollocks and lies!
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Join Date: Apr 2017
Location: Long Island, NY
Posts: 821
Originally Posted by PeacefulWater12
I have learnt such a lot during my time with him.
But yeah - new woman, same problems.
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Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: uk
Posts: 2,428
Originally Posted by FallenAngelina
I absolutely feel the same. I call him my Golden Ticket to AlAnon. Without him, I couldn't "get in" and that program (more pointedly, those people) has become my pathway to peace. He and I weave in and out of daily life, sometimes NC, sometimes walking together, but the more I focus on my own spiritual path, the better I feel and the better person I become. My XH (not an A) is actually grateful to my sometimes XABF for leading me into my own recovery program. All of my relationships benefit.
My AH was exactly the person I needed at the right time. Of course we think it is all THEM but we get to Al-anon and find out that it is US!
It has been a painful and gut wrenching journey but a very much needed one for me.
I now live a quiet and peaceful life, like you. Instead of a chaotic and insane one.
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