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Oh my god Now he’s vowing to do everything to fix this. He will do whatever it takes. We can be happy again. He’s hit bottom. I just can’t. It’s different every day! |
Dazed, it's time for you to do your imitation of a compass. Keep your needle pointing to true north, regardless of what bumps and twists the world around you takes. http://i67.tinypic.com/311rrbc.jpg |
Quit engaging him. He will say anything to get status quo back. Tell him to contact you after a full year of recovery and you will consider it then, but that meanwhile divorce goes forward. He will show true colors. Drunks don't like the effort starting over takes. Easier to keep you enabling. |
What is said in the mornings hardly ever matches what happens around late afternoons. It’s back to deciding what you want and accepting what you can control, yes? |
Originally Posted by Hawkeye13
(Post 7230809)
Quit engaging him. He will say anything to get status quo back. Tell him to contact you after a full year of recovery and you will consider it then, but that meanwhile divorce goes forward. He will show true colors. Drunks don't like the effort starting over takes. Easier to keep you enabling. |
When your focus is 100% on the addict — you will continue to go mad... & YOUR life will spiral out of control. Nothing good will come from walking back onto his rollercoaster. Ask for 1 year of sobriety minimum and ask a friend to crash on their couch! Obsession leads to heartbreak!!! |
Dazed...of course, he is a spinning top....he is an alcoholic. The time has finally come it seems...for the both of you to stop "talking the talk".... And, begin "walking the walk"..... talk is cheap... Action is what counts.... |
Originally Posted by Dazedandconfus
(Post 7230822)
I have told him divorce moving forward. He says ok he will still do whatever it takes. Now a few hours later he’s back to on his way out. Good god. |
as long as you sit there as his audience of one, the SHOW will go on. |
Originally Posted by Ariesagain
(Post 7230817)
What is said in the mornings hardly ever matches what happens around late afternoons. It’s back to deciding what you want and accepting what you can control, yes? |
Originally Posted by Hawkeye13
(Post 7230831)
There's the true colors. You do need to get out of the house and hearing range. I suggest if any contact is necessary before he leaves, it should be via email or text. His verbal garbage is piling up. |
Originally Posted by AnvilheadII
(Post 7230832)
as long as you sit there as his audience of one, the SHOW will go on. |
Originally Posted by dandylion
(Post 7230829)
Dazed...of course, he is a spinning top....he is an alcoholic. The time has finally come it seems...for the both of you to stop "talking the talk".... And, begin "walking the walk"..... talk is cheap... Action is what counts.... |
Originally Posted by LifeChangeNYC
(Post 7230823)
When your focus is 100% on the addict — you will continue to go mad... & YOUR life will spiral out of control. Nothing good will come from walking back onto his rollercoaster. Ask for 1 year of sobriety minimum and ask a friend to crash on their couch! Obsession leads to heartbreak!!! |
Originally Posted by honeypig
(Post 7230807)
Dazed, it's time for you to do your imitation of a compass. Keep your needle pointing to true north, regardless of what bumps and twists the world around you takes. http://i67.tinypic.com/311rrbc.jpg |
Sometimes it’s all such a blur that it’s good to be able to go back and see what you’ve been through..here’s the link to all your threads, just in case you need to remember... https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...archid=8640890 Wishing you strength and peace of mind... P.S. Your dog is okay, yes? |
Originally Posted by Ariesagain
(Post 7230851)
Sometimes it’s all such a blur that it’s good to be able to go back and see what you’ve been through..here’s the link to all your threads, just in case you need to remember... https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...archid=8640890 Wishing you strength and peace of mind... P.S. Your dog is okay, yes? |
So glad to hear you have exited the road show for now. For the love of all things holy, how long does it take him to pack. When is he leaving, beginning of August? Any way to move that up? You can't put up with this for another week and a half. Do you have anywhere you can go until then? Perhaps an Air BnB for a week at least. I know the costs of escaping are piling up and that may not be doable. How about a women's shelter? Might be an idea to give them a call? You are doing really well by the way, hang in there. |
Originally Posted by trailmix
(Post 7230859)
So glad to hear you have exited the road show for now. For the love of all things holy, how long does it take him to pack. When is he leaving, beginning of August? Any way to move that up? You can't put up with this for another week and a half. Do you have anywhere you can go until then? Perhaps an Air BnB for a week at least. I know the costs of escaping are piling up and that may not be doable. How about a women's shelter? Might be an idea to give them a call? You are doing really well by the way, hang in there. |
By the way, I told him he needed to pay me back for all the hotels I had to go to, he wrote the check. 😀 |
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