Just want to share my story.

I had been with her for nearly six years. We bought a house together and luckily we are covered by a watertight agreement to aggregate assets so no issues there.

We met in our late 20s and although I would not have said she is an alcoholic at that moment, I would in hindsight. Like most our age we would go out a lot, get drunk but she would go the extra step and seem to not last whilst being almost unconscious.

I later found out via her friends and family that she had the issue since 15. They had tried everything and could not managed to solve it.

i tried all I could to help from seeing people to trying different approaches. The best I got was 4 weeks sober and then relapse. It felt like every low just got worse and worse over time. The last year was just horrific and sad to watch. She had reached what I saw as the worst it could. She was a functional alcoholic. She would drive drunk to work and back, she would have days she was drunk twice and worst of all she lied about it and tried to cover it up. I managed to narrow down her drinking to either in the car parked or in her office (the manager had similar issues so I guessed they fed off each other). Other issues included memory loss, easy bruising, compulsive lying generally and the manifestation of a bi polar personality. She’s had police called and all sorts.

i made the decision a few weeks ago and went ahead this week. I feel sad but not because we broke up but because she’s just continuing this spiralling into a hell. Right now I count she’s been drunk at least 12 days in a row and this includes mornings, afternoons and evenings, sometimes multiple times a day.

for years I was convinced it was all my fault (as she was blaming me for it) but the revelation from her family and friends made me feel better.

since breaking up I am gaining my confidence back and anxiety she created (I couldn’t take her to any social event she would make an absolute fool of herself). She still can’t admit her problem.

i am sure there are success stories but if there is anyone out there that like me tries for years don’t be afraid to accept that leaving is the best decision.

Thank you for your kind messages.

Yesterday had a chat with her which started off cordial however she was drunk (albeit not her usual comatose state).

she then evolved into the usual that it’s my fault she is like this etc and conceited what I would say is a fantasy about what’s happened. I must admit it angered me but I’m trying to keep civil!

Honestly in the last 30 days she must have been drunk for at least 27 of them

thats the plan but have to live together for few weeks until she finds a place and she accepts my offer to buy her out (both are in progress).

when she comes back drunk she always tries to talk to me

absolutely, she wanted to get married too but I knew those were both not a starter