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Beachn…..I am sooo glad to hear that you both are getting the kinds and amounts of help and support that you need and deserve! I commend the both of you.... |
Thank you for the words of encouragement. Some times you have to look back at what you’ve dealt with to appreciate where you are. As for my addiction, the benzo was accidental and the moment I realized what it had done to my brain I quit and suffered through intense hell for 4-5 months, just as she was doing a kamikaze with our lives. Still fighting PAWS daily. It sucks. No excuse for abusing the booze, My explanation in retrospect is it helped alleviate my inter dose withdrawal from Xanax I experienced twice a day every damn day that I believed was just me and my reaction to the level of stress we were under. Trusting someone that has undergone such a drastic change in behavior and attitude is tough. Although you never truly know anyone, there are usual parameters that people operate in that allows you some semblance of predictability. When they act so far outside of those parameters it destroys everything you’ve built over the years. They become a stranger capable of anything and are no longer “predictable”. There’s the boring predictable, then there’s the “normal” behavior predictable which is a necessity in a healthy relationship. It’s like starting a friendship with someone that’s already hurt and pissed you off more than anyone you know. |
Hi Beachn, How are you doing? |
Six weeks is very little recovery so don't feel too guilty. As a recovering alcoholic (27 years) I'd wait until she has a year, then reevaluate it. I know it's very tough to withdraw from benzodiazepines so please be gentle with yourself. Big hug! |
Originally Posted by Mango212
(Post 7227674)
Hi Beachn, How are you doing? I’m doing. Thanks for asking. Good and bad days, can’t seem to shake a certain level of...discomfort... living with someone that went so far into the deep end. Addiction revealed far more than I bargained for about life, people and myself. Lessons I would rather not have learned from the sadistic taskmaster addiction.
Originally Posted by NYCDoglvr
(Post 7227825)
Six weeks is very little recovery so don't feel too guilty. As a recovering alcoholic (27 years) I'd wait until she has a year, then reevaluate it. I know it's very tough to withdraw from benzodiazepines so please be gentle with yourself. Big hug! Thanks for the reminder and Congratulations on 27 years. Beachn |
Originally Posted by Beachn
(Post 7227943)
Addiction revealed far more than I bargained for about life, people and myself. Lessons I would rather not have learned from the sadistic taskmaster addiction. Good to hear from you. I hope you don't expect very much from yourself nor your wife right now. That you are both standing and getting through each day is commendable after all you have been through. |
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