How bad is it when the drunk wets the bed and blames you when your covered in his urine? - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
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Old 06-18-2019, 05:54 PM   #1 (permalink)
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How bad is it when the drunk wets the bed and blames you when your covered in his urine?



I remember waking up covered in urine he had peed all over me? I didn't know what to say as I felt so sorry for him being an empath I woke him up and said I had an accident and wet the bed even though my underwear was dry the back of my pajamas and bed wasn't. I left went home said I wanted to clean up I didn't go back that night I got bombarded with the meanest text messages filled with profanity
"you this, you that" I cleaned the sheets from your nasty **** and you aren't here with me I can't believe I really said it was me. His family said bedwetting was normal all the time. I don't want to go backwards he had to have known he wet the bed and maybe was embarassed so took all his rage out on me. He was soaked not me lol I can't believe I said it was me. The rose pedal googles combined with his beer googles. I feel embarassed. Anyone been pissed on and pissed off and took the blame? It's not funny at all as it's a serious disease but wow I really took the blame for wetting the bed.
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Old 06-18-2019, 06:19 PM   #2 (permalink)
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This is the first time that I will ever admit to that, and perhaps the last. It took courage to write what you did. I always slept in a t shirt, my ex slept naked. I woke up and the whole back of my t shirt was wet, not that much underneath me. My ex always had to sleep practically on top of me. In order to shut him up, I told him that I wet the bed, and that I would clean it up.

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Old 06-18-2019, 06:36 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Thank you for saying I had courage. I felt bad but the feelings were not mutual later that night when my feelings were really hurt. I plead guilty when I was innocent and he read me for filth. I hope wherever he is he is not bed wetting or the next girl is pulling a me.
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Old 06-18-2019, 07:00 PM   #4 (permalink)
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jjf.sounds like he was knee deep in denial and projecting.....
At least, you seem to have some self awareness that you took your sacrificial nature too far..... I am quite sure that you won't ever do that, again! lol....

this remind me of a poster, who told of her husband who passed out on the couch.....Nest morning. he claimed that the cat peed on his crotch, while he was asleep.....
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Old 06-18-2019, 07:25 PM   #5 (permalink)
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No one is pissing on me and telling me it's raining ever again. Looking back I feel more bad for myself. What was i thinking/ Why I the one drinking? I THINK NOT!
his own family members said to me does he pee the bed isn't that disgusting. I said no not ever around me. I did feel bad as this was his family who would get pissy drunk w him i felt he had no supports so I came to his defense. But, does anyone think he was very embarassed and really knew? he hates me but that's the alcohol hatred......i still pray for him as he is surrounded by other drunks i never heard his mom so bluntly say move on he is dying your a smart girl as much as I can't stand you as you panic over someone that is dying and verbally abusing you we have given up 20 years ago and leave it in god's hand. That statement made me want to help even more well what do you know 1 year later im all the way down south to never embarass myself again. I do google his name once in a while to see if he passed away I think I should stop that as as much as it was fake it was a year of my life that i did feel some type of love. He is alive and kicking and partying his life away. I'm not trying to back track on here but love really is blind and when I meet the next one my trust issues and guard is so up I have my bullet proof vest on I don't ever think I can love the way I did before. Enough of the boo-hoo i was pissed on!!!!
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Old 06-18-2019, 07:42 PM   #6 (permalink)
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I don't know how long you are away from him. Is it recently or longer. I know that I am divorced for almost 9 years now and I still question some of the things that happened. There is no problem with that. We gain information, so that we will never make the same mistake, or perhaps we get answers to our own unanswered questions. It also help for you to tell you story for those that are still "in" the situation you were in. I was diagnosed with c-PTSD from my marriage, and there are a lot of things to deal with after a relationship. It was so hard for me to believe that the closure that I needed was with myself, and not with the person that was hurting me.

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Old 06-18-2019, 07:48 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Denial and blame shifting. The alcoholic works real hard to maintain a contrived image of there's nothing wrong, he's always right and there's something wrong with you.

Hopefully it was a control/bed wetting issue and not an act based on suppressed resentment.
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Old 06-18-2019, 07:48 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Not this experience but the day I decided to leave was the one my XAH, whod been having symptoms of liver failure for months and refusing to go to the doctor passed out drunk w a nosebleed that hadnt stopped for 10 hours. I can home to him passed out covered in his own blood with an empty bottle next to him (because finishing the drink was more important than his kid not seeing a crime scene when she got home and more important than seeking medical care). He blamed me for the mess because of how I had organized the cleaning products (in such a manner that he knocked them all over and so gave up cleaning it up). So, I so relate.

You are not the a-hole here.
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Old 06-18-2019, 07:49 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Hi Amy,
I have C PTSD as well way before him. My story is in here maybe you can help as when he left I was mean to some people on here. I was half asleep on benadryl as sleep is the cousin of death I did not want to do anything crazy but I wanted to isolate and cry and sleep. I put this one up as I knew it would get responses my really story is a few posts down it says sorry if I was snarky. I forgive myself for being mean to some of the posters in here as we are all hurting and on here for advice. I have apologized twice but boy isolation is the devil's workshop and the things you do in iso w trauma can be embarassing. My post is there I still live in fear. Thanks Amy i know what complex ptsd is........
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Old 06-18-2019, 07:56 PM   #10 (permalink)
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OK, you only show as having 8 posts so I didn't know if I should look for anything further. If you are telling me this, I would assume it's under the same name.

Look, I have also jumped on people who were telling me things that I didn't want to hear. We understand that here.

Let me go find the other post and I'll get back to you.

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Old 06-18-2019, 08:08 PM   #11 (permalink)
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OK, I'm reading all this, but did you change your name? I'm here to help you, or be supportive to you. I know how crazy I went at times, but things do change.

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Old 06-18-2019, 08:11 PM   #12 (permalink)
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I guess I am trying to figure out where you are right now. Are you still stuck on that hamster wheel that goes round and round or are you trying to figure out why you got on that hamster wheel?

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Old 06-18-2019, 08:48 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Yes, I did im healing i guess........i was posting last summer which is a year ago i have apologized profusely i kept asking if he would come back i was in fight or flight a user told me he hates you your a stalker quit now before you go 2 jail. I did not like that response it didnt help one bit yet she was right. People came out and actually defended me and said they had been reading stories but were to afraid to ever tell there own after seeing that harsh treatment they decided they would never post on here. I also tell the truth yes indeed i was dealing with a sexual assault the criminal and the civil lawsuit it was pretty high profile when MS. Gloria Alred called me i tried explaining my drunk told me I deserved it and the pain and getting dragged through the legal system and blamed I was told to get an attorney we don't specialize in attorney stuff here I had an attorney, had a potential 3 million dollar lawsuit, had a therapist, had the dream time I was speaking from the heart of what it was like dating a fake fiance alcoholic while trying to heal from a rape. He made it worse. I apologized to the lady who told me to leave him alone, im a pyscho stalker, and i must want to be in jail. I don't see stalking as driving looking for him, or calling him. Never once did I show up or resort to violence i reached out to his family and friends. I wasn't going to jail for being concerned even my lawyer said that. I did have a different handle I don't want to pull it up or relive last summer I hope everyone can respect my wishes. I did tell the poster indeed you are right he does not love me, i should have never stalked him, and listened to you in the first place. The ptsd was so bad i started wearing depends i wondered what was going on my body was in shock i could not control my bowel movements not until November 18 i went to the er and was told I had a hemrrhoid. 6 months I walked around with so much types of pain. One dose of probiotics that I got out the way and I take them daily never want to see that again. I'm wondering why I would get a seist and desist letter from a female I never met, stalked, or tarnished her reputation. If anything i provided money, resources, birthday gifts to a child I never met. I'm out here trying to find myself and months later someone I don't know who hit me w many D threats ran to the cops. I escaped all that what is she trying to prove. Once again I'm not looking to go to war on here what was said 1 year ago is done i see people read but don't say anything. That's fine. I'm scared what does the drunk's child's mother want to happen to me.
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Old 06-18-2019, 08:56 PM   #14 (permalink)
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i changed my name multiple times and dont want to dig up last summer my only concern is a seist and desist letter from a stranger. i made amends if people choose to not respond that's fine there are always other's that do. Not everyone is going to like me i learned that this year and i owe no one an explanation as why i reacted the way I did. I commend myself for being self aware and apologizing when the pain was much 2 raw to handle so i cancelled 3 accounts.
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Old 06-18-2019, 09:05 PM   #15 (permalink)
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OK, I want you to calm down a little. I do know that bringing up some of this stuff makes our blood pressure soar, and we might get into fight or flight again. So breath in breath out, keep doing that. I"m listening.

I heard you talking before about isolating yourself, that is one of the worst things that you can do. I also isolated myself. The thing is, I was only left with crazy thoughts that were going around in my own head. I didn't mean that to say that I don't believe you, because I do, I meant that to say that I had crazy thoughts of how to make things better.

I guess you can also say that I stalked my ex also. I did it by checking where he used his credit. We were married then, but he would disappear for first days at a time, then weeks, then months at a time.

Where is your ex and his girlfriend living now? From what you posted here, you live in Florida.

What I found to be the most helpful to me, was to talk to people. To stop isolating myself, to do some volunteer work, I don't know, just anything to get out of my own head.

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Old 06-18-2019, 09:17 PM   #16 (permalink)
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... Tmi
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Old 06-18-2019, 09:24 PM   #17 (permalink)
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She threw him out in less than 60 days and slept with his best friend but im the girl who suceeded in real estate and mortgages by "sleeping with my bosses"

amy someone who doesnt like me and hurt my feelings it shows has read my post. Should i ask a moderator to delete my acccount as if 1 year ago stuff is pulled up on me ill go back to iso and be very hurt. I'm hyper sensitive and an empath naturally i felt bad for being mean. I dont feel welcomed on here maybe you could email me i saw the handle and had a panic attack. I'm away from all of them down south no supports finding myself lawsuit dropped health over wealth. With you having ptsd if this site has triggered you badly in the past wouldd you get off? I think it's bad for my health Amy not to trigger you and we dont have to email im just scared of this bs intimidating letter that came out of the blue
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Old 06-18-2019, 09:28 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Money i dont have the drunk took it all Gloria Alred got wind of my truth and gave me 30 mins of her time on the phone. She was chasing down Cosby and other celebrities but referred me to one of her partners who said this is going to be hell for you and not 3 million this could go on another ten years. Once again health over wealth 14 years over a green piece of paper the gov't never stops printing. Keep your money my book will triple that in shorter time. "You can't make this up if you tried"
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Old 06-18-2019, 09:38 PM   #19 (permalink)
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If you want, you can always PM me here.
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Old 06-18-2019, 09:49 PM   #20 (permalink)
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i have to have 25 posts to pm you im going to log out i hope nobody has ill will towards me tomorrow only god knows i tried. goodnite,
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