Fast abuse cycle
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2019
Posts: 298
Fast abuse cycle
Wednesday-Saturday nights, excessive drinking and nasty little comments/implications.
Sunday-“Honeymoon phase”—“Disneyland Dad/Husband”
Monday evening-Authoritarian, resents having to had to go to work, irritable.
Quick turnaround folks! Don’t you think?
Sunday-“Honeymoon phase”—“Disneyland Dad/Husband”
Monday evening-Authoritarian, resents having to had to go to work, irritable.
Quick turnaround folks! Don’t you think?
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Boston
Posts: 2,936
Yuk. Dreadful. Not a healthy ride at all for the family.
What's your daily routine like? Alcoholism/addiction takes over a lot (if not all) of the emotional atmosphere in a family, it's a horrible dynamic to grow up in, I can describe it well!! Took me a long time to get my head turned around and facing in the direction I wanted to go. AlAnon helped me enormously! Wish I'd had access to it, or Alateen, or any kind of truth-telling therapy as a kid.
Peace,
B.
What's your daily routine like? Alcoholism/addiction takes over a lot (if not all) of the emotional atmosphere in a family, it's a horrible dynamic to grow up in, I can describe it well!! Took me a long time to get my head turned around and facing in the direction I wanted to go. AlAnon helped me enormously! Wish I'd had access to it, or Alateen, or any kind of truth-telling therapy as a kid.
Peace,
B.
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 1,254
Observed similar cycles or routines. Sometimes they're in a good mood the first half of the day because they haven't started drinking yet. If they don't over do the sports drinks and diet sodas early sometimes they are in a good mood.
Funny you mention 'authoritarian' because here he likes to treat people like an employee or views himself as the boss. Must be the alpha in most if not all relationships.
I think with most alcoholics they have underlying deep seated feelings, opinions etc and they become visible when drunk. He's nice on Sunday because he feels obligated to or that's what he's supposed to do. Not because he wants to. Maybe not that simple but if he's doing it with regularity the moods, comments etc probably not just about alcohol.
Funny you mention 'authoritarian' because here he likes to treat people like an employee or views himself as the boss. Must be the alpha in most if not all relationships.
I think with most alcoholics they have underlying deep seated feelings, opinions etc and they become visible when drunk. He's nice on Sunday because he feels obligated to or that's what he's supposed to do. Not because he wants to. Maybe not that simple but if he's doing it with regularity the moods, comments etc probably not just about alcohol.
Life is good
Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 4,036
Hi pizza,
Welcome to SR!
Do you have any current in-person support for dealing with the emotional abuse and this Family Disease of Alcoholism?
My local domestic abuse help center and Al-Anon groups have played a huge part in allowing me room to regain my confidence and step out of my very familiar comfort zone.
The three A's:
Awareness
Acceptance
Action
Welcome to SR!
Do you have any current in-person support for dealing with the emotional abuse and this Family Disease of Alcoholism?
My local domestic abuse help center and Al-Anon groups have played a huge part in allowing me room to regain my confidence and step out of my very familiar comfort zone.
The three A's:
Awareness
Acceptance
Action
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
It sounds awful. What are you doing for yourself and your children to protect yourselves from this? I hope you have face to face support.
Keep posting, you are not alone. We have all (or most of us) have been there! You deserve so much more.
Keep posting, you are not alone. We have all (or most of us) have been there! You deserve so much more.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 16,246
pizza.....Yep....it is a Thing, alright. Very predictable and recognizable "cycle"....that all of us who have been with an alcoholic can recognize....
Do you recognize a pattern of your own reactions to this behavior...?
Do you recognize a pattern of your own reactions to this behavior...?
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 16,246
pizza....I am so anxiously awaiting the answer to my above question....lol....
Why? Because, our relationship with our loved one is like a dance...where both move together in the same rhythm to the same steps...kind of like the Argentine Tango....
When we examine the alcoholic's behaviors....it is important for us to examine our own, just as closely...…
Argentine Tango
https://www.bing.com/videos/search?q...C7EB&FORM=VIRE
Why? Because, our relationship with our loved one is like a dance...where both move together in the same rhythm to the same steps...kind of like the Argentine Tango....
When we examine the alcoholic's behaviors....it is important for us to examine our own, just as closely...…
Argentine Tango
https://www.bing.com/videos/search?q...C7EB&FORM=VIRE
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