Alanon Question
Member
Join Date: Apr 2017
Location: Long Island, NY
Posts: 821
I am chairing our Alanon meeting right now and we mention anonymity twice during the meeting - once in the opening and once in the closing. My experience is that nobody gossips or talks about others outside the meeting. If I run into familiar people from the meeting elsewhere, we all know not to acknowledge each other in public unless we have explicit consent.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 1,618
Are you concerned that there will be a disclosure about the abuse of a child?
My understanding is that for mandated reporters, they must report if they have "reasonable grounds" to believe that a child is being abused (i.e. you don't need absolute proof, just "reasonable grounds"). However, what happens in the course of the reporting and afterwards could vary depending on the situation. Anonymity and/or other measures to reduce risk to the child, the person who disclosed, and the reporter could be involved.
I am not a mandated reporter, but I have twice reported concerns that a child was being neglected (two different kids, and neither had anything to do with "my" alcoholic). In both cases, my identity was never made known.
My understanding is that for mandated reporters, they must report if they have "reasonable grounds" to believe that a child is being abused (i.e. you don't need absolute proof, just "reasonable grounds"). However, what happens in the course of the reporting and afterwards could vary depending on the situation. Anonymity and/or other measures to reduce risk to the child, the person who disclosed, and the reporter could be involved.
I am not a mandated reporter, but I have twice reported concerns that a child was being neglected (two different kids, and neither had anything to do with "my" alcoholic). In both cases, my identity was never made known.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2017
Posts: 356
I didn’t go to alanon very long but it should be very anonymous. I know my ex never wanted to go to AA in town because he knows a lot of people in town as he is in the medical field. After he went to rehab though I guess he got past that fear and he went to a lot of meetings that first year. As far as I know he has never had any issues. I can understand the fear though but I think that is really common due to the stigma that goes along with addiction. But I doubt anyone goes to these meetings just for « fun » to go see who is an alcoholic or family of an alcoholic. You should feel safe going to them.
I am a little puzzled about your concern for a potential mandatory reporter? Because unless you feel like your kids are in an unsafe environment at home or that they suffer abuse why would you worry about that? Also, it is not like people ask you questions. You share what you are willing to share. And if the first few times if you want to just scope it out and not really share anything you can do that too. It was kind of scary going that first time but even though it ended up not being my thing I did get something out of it and I never felt unsafe as far as anonymity goes. Everyone was very supportive.
I am a little puzzled about your concern for a potential mandatory reporter? Because unless you feel like your kids are in an unsafe environment at home or that they suffer abuse why would you worry about that? Also, it is not like people ask you questions. You share what you are willing to share. And if the first few times if you want to just scope it out and not really share anything you can do that too. It was kind of scary going that first time but even though it ended up not being my thing I did get something out of it and I never felt unsafe as far as anonymity goes. Everyone was very supportive.
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