What is the opposite of Fear?
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Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
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No problem. Fear is a hot topic for me because I went through some years of just awful, terrible, crippling fears that gave me panic attacks and I was just miserable.
The counselor explained it to me like your brain being a filing cabinet. When you have experiences, they get filed into certain cabinets. Some labeled FEAR. Some labeled HAPPINESS. Some labeled CALM. The list goes on. For me to get past that fear, I had to go through that cabinet, read all the files, and unravel what was in there.
You are right. It was no picnic going through it. However, now I am moving on to the other filing cabinets and they are much more pleasant to be around, and hopefully I am too! I certainly feel more calm and in charge.
I had a hard time grasping this as well because it was almost TOO simple. You mean I could control this fear and not let it overtake me simply by addressing what was in my cabinets?? Sure enough!!!
I love how you are always looking inward and figuring things out. I don't take enough time out to self examine as I should. I am going to work on that. I have been journaling again, I was so ashamed to see when I got it out this week that it was last Thanksgiving when I had written in it last. Things just got...busy.
I hope you share what conclusions you draw on friend!!!
The counselor explained it to me like your brain being a filing cabinet. When you have experiences, they get filed into certain cabinets. Some labeled FEAR. Some labeled HAPPINESS. Some labeled CALM. The list goes on. For me to get past that fear, I had to go through that cabinet, read all the files, and unravel what was in there.
You are right. It was no picnic going through it. However, now I am moving on to the other filing cabinets and they are much more pleasant to be around, and hopefully I am too! I certainly feel more calm and in charge.
I had a hard time grasping this as well because it was almost TOO simple. You mean I could control this fear and not let it overtake me simply by addressing what was in my cabinets?? Sure enough!!!
I love how you are always looking inward and figuring things out. I don't take enough time out to self examine as I should. I am going to work on that. I have been journaling again, I was so ashamed to see when I got it out this week that it was last Thanksgiving when I had written in it last. Things just got...busy.
I hope you share what conclusions you draw on friend!!!
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Location: Adelaide, Australia
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I will most likely always have fear.....a life painted with a brush of damage and trauma....opposite? Unsure- maybe facing that fear and working past it to move on- with support if necessary.
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Originally Posted by PhoenixJ 
I will most likely always have fear.....a life painted with a brush of damage and trauma....opposite? Unsure- maybe facing that fear and working past it to move on- with support if necessary.
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Originally Posted by hopeful4
No problem. Fear is a hot topic for me because I went through some years of just awful, terrible, crippling fears that gave me panic attacks and I was just miserable.
The counselor explained it to me like your brain being a filing cabinet. When you have experiences, they get filed into certain cabinets. Some labeled FEAR. Some labeled HAPPINESS. Some labeled CALM. The list goes on. For me to get past that fear, I had to go through that cabinet, read all the files, and unravel what was in there.
You are right. It was no picnic going through it. However, now I am moving on to the other filing cabinets and they are much more pleasant to be around, and hopefully I am too! I certainly feel more calm and in charge.
I had a hard time grasping this as well because it was almost TOO simple. You mean I could control this fear and not let it overtake me simply by addressing what was in my cabinets?? Sure enough!!!
The counselor explained it to me like your brain being a filing cabinet. When you have experiences, they get filed into certain cabinets. Some labeled FEAR. Some labeled HAPPINESS. Some labeled CALM. The list goes on. For me to get past that fear, I had to go through that cabinet, read all the files, and unravel what was in there.
You are right. It was no picnic going through it. However, now I am moving on to the other filing cabinets and they are much more pleasant to be around, and hopefully I am too! I certainly feel more calm and in charge.
I had a hard time grasping this as well because it was almost TOO simple. You mean I could control this fear and not let it overtake me simply by addressing what was in my cabinets?? Sure enough!!!
I don't know what the opposite of fear is for me, but I do know that for me the yucky not good type of fear is steeped in shame.
Right now things are so good for me overall but I am hitting an old shame spot and I can just feel myself NOT WANTING to deal with it. A lot of my old coping mechanisms are coming up.
I know what it is, it is not scary but it is old, it is big because it is so old.
I loved the filing cabinet analogy Hopeful because it allows me to see that no matter how much work I have done there are still files there that need another sorting.....
The files are not loaded, my feelings about them are.
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Join Date: Mar 2017
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For me, the opposite of fear is strength. Or a particular kind of strength that involves self-trust and self-reliance. And resilience. The thing I fear [insert whatever here] is not going to destroy me. I will withstand it.
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Okay, revealing my geek-infested roots, this thread reminds me of a quote from Frank Herbert's sci-fi classic Dune. This is the incantation that a society of mental adepts teaches their initiates:
“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”
“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”
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Join Date: Nov 2016
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Originally Posted by Sasha1972
“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”
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Originally Posted by FireSprite
Absolutely. When I cross paths with a tiger in the woods I need to feel Fear in order to trigger my fight-or-flight to tell me to run away.
The problem is that in today's world, we run from "paper tigers" and perceived dangers the same way - and that's NOT healthy.
I shouldn't react to a phone call from my mother in the same way I do a tiger in the woods, but our long history of passive aggressive abuse & neglect means that I do.
That's fear-programming that I can & should change for my own benefit. I cannot change history, but when I'm triggered in present day I can mantra that "there is no tiger" & start walking to engage the hip flexors which signals the brain that I AM in fact running from the tiger. This stops the flood of adrenalin my body produced to help me run to safety which reduces my anxiety & allows me to talk myself out of my panic to see the situation for what it really is - something happening around me now, not something happening TO my inner child.
The problem is that in today's world, we run from "paper tigers" and perceived dangers the same way - and that's NOT healthy.
I shouldn't react to a phone call from my mother in the same way I do a tiger in the woods, but our long history of passive aggressive abuse & neglect means that I do.
That's fear-programming that I can & should change for my own benefit. I cannot change history, but when I'm triggered in present day I can mantra that "there is no tiger" & start walking to engage the hip flexors which signals the brain that I AM in fact running from the tiger. This stops the flood of adrenalin my body produced to help me run to safety which reduces my anxiety & allows me to talk myself out of my panic to see the situation for what it really is - something happening around me now, not something happening TO my inner child.
Firesprite, I know you've read a bit about Buddhism. You may know that, in Buddhism, "Hope" is considered to be the opposite of Fear. And that both Hope and Fear are considered to be delusions / obscurations. We go through our days hoping that things will happen or fearing that they won't, or vice versa. Hope hope hope, fear fear fear, all day long.
And then, in bigger ways, all this hope and fear starts to obscure our wisdom. We hope our partner will be love us (attachment). We fear that our partner's anger (aversion).
We get caught up in attachment (hope) to the people in our life. We fear and avoid difficult but important conversations (aversion).
We forgive our partner's unforgivable actions (hope); we refuse to look at the possibility of changing our lives to get away from a bad relationship (fear).
And eventually, we find ourselves locked into habitual patterns of responding to these things.
In all these examples, what we aren't doing is tapping into our own personal wisdom, looking at things as they are, and making the right decisions for ourselves.
Hope and fear used wisely can guide us. You hear a twig crack in the forest, see a bear, and you run -- fear. If you know you are going into bear country you hike with bear spray or a gun. You see a favorable opportunity and you take it.
But without wisdom and discernment, hope (attachment) and fear (aversion) are just poisonous emotions that keep us trapped in our habitual patterns. Seen as guideposts, and if we can maintain our equanimity, our innate wisdom, they can help illuminate correct choices for us.
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I learned in AA that the opposite of fear is faith. As part of my step 4, I wrote a fear inventory. I saw that most of my fears were irrational fears and they originated from a long time ago. I also learned in AA that the opposite of fear is love and trust--trusting in our Higher Power.
Nowadays I feel like the opposite of fear is courage. Courage leads to action which takes power away from the fear.
The opposite of fear is truth - seeing that fear are just lies as part of story your mind is telling.
I also agree with the above post that says the opposite of fear is self-love.
Nowadays I feel like the opposite of fear is courage. Courage leads to action which takes power away from the fear.
The opposite of fear is truth - seeing that fear are just lies as part of story your mind is telling.
I also agree with the above post that says the opposite of fear is self-love.
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