Heyhey
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 11
Heyhey
Ok so i posted quite a while ago that i found out my husband was a alcoholic. So we have had sa year of ups and downs and in the last 2 weeks we had a pretty decent low he called his mum to say we were getting divorced then the next weekend he accused me of cheating on him and i decided to leave he begged me not to and said he would pull his head out of his ass and for the past week has had nothing to drink. He promises that he will behave as he doesnt want to lose me.....i have heard this before but then have also found bottles hidden again (none so far yet) but i dont trust him i dont k ow what to do i have given him till this weekend to see what happens on the weekend as he has said will only have a couple of beers no spirits.
i am at a loss i have looked at some places to move to so i guess this is d day im scared that he will hurt himself if i leave is the problem
i am at a loss i have looked at some places to move to so i guess this is d day im scared that he will hurt himself if i leave is the problem
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Join Date: Apr 2008
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Sounds like he's just saying what he thinks you want to hear. He's lied before and he's still lying. You cannot trust him and without trust, there is no relationship.
If he hurts himself, he hurts himself. It has nothing to do with you. He's an adult, even if he doesn't act like one. I say go ahead a move out and go no contact.
If he hurts himself, he hurts himself. It has nothing to do with you. He's an adult, even if he doesn't act like one. I say go ahead a move out and go no contact.
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Join Date: Aug 2011
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heyhey…...it is very profoundly uncomfortable and can be very dangerous for an alcoholic to go "cold turkey" sober.....withdrawal symptoms begin within a few hours...even if you can't see them....For some people, it can be life threatening....
Very frequently, the alcoholic ill drink again to keep the withdrawal symptoms at bay.....
This can be averted if the alcoholic will see a doctor and get supervision and medications for the withdrawal period.....or, even better, agree to go into a hospital detox unit, for a few days...then, on to a rehab facility, or outpatient program, or/and AA....
Have you ever discussed this with him...?
Very frequently, the alcoholic ill drink again to keep the withdrawal symptoms at bay.....
This can be averted if the alcoholic will see a doctor and get supervision and medications for the withdrawal period.....or, even better, agree to go into a hospital detox unit, for a few days...then, on to a rehab facility, or outpatient program, or/and AA....
Have you ever discussed this with him...?
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Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 8,631
Originally Posted by Newwife28 
i am at a loss i have looked at some places to move to so i guess this is d day im scared that he will hurt himself if i leave is the problem
Last year at this time when you posted he was being violent with household items (and drinking of course).
What has changed in the last year? Has it gotten any better? Doesn't sound like it. How many times in the last year has he promised to straighten out?
Sober since 10th April 2012
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Perth, Western Australia
Posts: 6,047
From what you've told us he doesn't sound anything close to recovery. An A has to stop drinking completely, and a couple of beers counts as drinking. He seems to be focusing on keeping you happy and off his back, and that's not a motive that will get him sober in the long run.
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Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 8,631
Originally Posted by Newwife28
I think you are all right i just have to do it i am terrified we moved to a new town recently and i dont know anyone here i at least have a job! I actually feel sick to my stomach.
For now, you need to look after your own well being perhaps.
Try not to think of the disaster - I will leave and he will hurt himself and I will feel guilty forever and it will all be destroyed and I'm in a town where I don't know anyone and and - !
You are just moving to another accommodation, not the moon!
In fact you might be doing him a favor as well. But you can't "save" him, you've proven that to yourself, but you can save yourself from further hurt.
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Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 11
Hey so i did it i left today!!!
I couldnt do it anymore.....xmas day but the straw broke the camels back...a night of being called his exs name saying im exactly like her then a day of being told im cheating on him i did it!!! Im currently in a caravan park with 3 cats and a dog 😂
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Join Date: Dec 2008
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Good morning, Newwife,
Merry Christmas!! Well, that was a very brave thing you did, and you did it for yourself!!
You must be exhausted, too. I hope you can get some rest today and tomorrow, and then start looking for a cozy little place to live with you and your furbabies!
Hang in there!
S
Merry Christmas!! Well, that was a very brave thing you did, and you did it for yourself!!
You must be exhausted, too. I hope you can get some rest today and tomorrow, and then start looking for a cozy little place to live with you and your furbabies!
Hang in there!
S
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Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 681
Originally Posted by Newwife28
I couldnt do it anymore.....xmas day but the straw broke the camels back...a night of being called his exs name saying im exactly like her then a day of being told im cheating on him i did it!!! Im currently in a caravan park with 3 cats and a dog 😂
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