Mango212

Thank you. Maudcat, Optival, mamabear, SmallButMighty, Seren, Hawkeye, hopeful, FireSprite, atalose, LovePeaceSushi, trailmix, dandlion, and all others here with me.

We've been nomadic lately. A lot of people do this. It can be very adventurous, educational and healing. It's not a crime.

Ranch life is the same in some ways. Adventurous, educational, healing. Yesterday we were observing scat piles of deer, moose and elk. We often see these kinds of wildlife. During the summer some of the bird poop that dive-bombed the back porch was completely purple from berries.

A completely different kind of education, along with doing math in many ways as opportunities present themselves at home, while traveling, in books, by imagination, via YouTube, etc.

Praying. Meditating.

This aloneness of not having my son here is weird. He's been away before. This is different.

#livinginthesolution

Hawkeye13

dandylion

Mango....of course, you miss him. That is only natural......

Opivotal

((Mango))

We're here for you.

Mango212

Thank you so very much for the support. Hugs greatly appreciated!!

Sitting outside looking at the Big Dipper.

I can do a really loud wolf cry. I didn't know that! I don't know what else to call it. It gave me a laugh along with lots of tears flowing.

Music on. Feeling my emotions. Serenity among a river of tears.

#thankyougod #healthyconnections

clarity888

Oh my, CPS. Yes, they have to follow through on their process, all the red tape, but hopefully their guesstimate of 6 months is just that, a total guess. I hope once they go through their initial steps or process (like during the first week or so), they can chill out some about the overlooked paperwork. Hoping once they know more from your social worker, and how hard you've worked to create a peaceful and adventurous life for your son, they will back down. I'm sorry you're having to experience this, and admire how you're handling it.

Mango212

Thank you, clarity.

You all get to hear my side of the story. The CPS worker didn't want my cell phone number until the end, and never asked for my ID, mailing address or employment information. She allowed less information from me than what's on my resume. I did give a background on our family yesterday, and that doesn't mean anything in terms of whether I'm a fit parent.


I've had plenty of God signs showing me things will work out. One foot in front of the other.

clarity888

Well my post got deleted...just wanted to say I am sorry that you have to deal with this. And you are handling it in a very admirable way. Like you said, one step at a time, and your son and you are indeed safe.

hearthealth

Mango, I want to say this as gentle as possible. I know your hurting and missing your son. You were giving him a good life and an education. Actions have consequences and so does inaction about his paperwork. That is a big deal. I also wondering if adult DS didn't make the CPS report because he was concerned about brother's education. CPS is looking after son.

Surfbee

Hey Mango, sending you lots of love and support. This is a challenging phase - and it will pass. Help and guidance is on the way.

Trailmix and Dandylion make good points about the source of this complaint and why. This is a great opportunity to research and strengthen your armoury here... make your case strong. Provide evidence "on paper" that proves you are a solid parent. I. E. Gather testimonials from your friends, character references, a "homeschooling schedule" of sorts. And solid research that backs up homeschooling teachings. Anything strong that you can use to demonstrate that you got this. I personally love and agree with your alternative approach and school of thinking, but frustratingly you've been invited to a challenge. One that you will take on for the sake of your family. 💪

Now is the time to activate your "researcher brain" / your "lawyer brain" whatever focus it takes to get on the side of the CPS. Knowledge is power.

And in the end you'll be all the stronger and happier for it. Sending lots of love, you got this Mango x

Mango212

I'm having a huge wave of stress hit now. Sitting with this. Breathing deeply. Natural feelings and emotions arising, flowing, allowing release and transformation of them. Whatever it takes. Healthy connections all around me. Earth, nature and the power of pausing.

This came after having time outside. I was holding a hot mug of bulletproof coffee, feeling the warmth of it, enjoying the deep fragrance of the coffee, a light chill in the air and a light snow falling.

Letting the good in life lead this. Letting stress out in easy ways. Letting go of the stress and moving forward.

#lawofattraction

trailmix

Waves of stress suck, no two ways about that!

Just keep doing the next right thing, for you and for your Son, that's all you can do.

You do have this you know. You are smart and you are strong, don't doubt that.

Courage.

Mango212

Surfbee & trailmix, thank you. I welcome this advice and support.

Today seems to have a much different flow than what I anticipated.

Living in the solution often requires I wait. The light snow has turned to heavy flakes. The seasons are changing. It's Halloween today. Kid and I were greatly looking forward to fun surprises today. This sucks. I miss him. He has a light-up stick man costume and we also talked about maybe finding a different costume for him today. We went to a haunted corn maze last Saturday, with light crowds early in the evening. A tractor with big trailers lined with seating brought everyone out to the corn field. One the way out to the farm, I was inspired to stop and see llamas and kid and I met a wonderful woman who knows one of the family members putting on the event. She assured us it would be more fun than scary. It was. They even had a fabulous caterer with Dutch oven cooking - we chose pulled pork, cheeseburger, baked beans and corn on the cob.

Even in this, almost two hours from our home area, there are wonderful ties. A hog farmer DS22 bought pigs from for 4-H. The potato farm I bought organic potatoes from several years ago when I needed large amounts. Shirttail relatives I've never met live there, too. Their grandparent and my great-grandparent were somehow related.

#thankyougod

DontRemember

I had never dealt with CPS until this year with one of my employees. His son was taken after he was reported for the exact reasons your's was. When is your preliminary CPS hearing? It's normally the week of or following week. CPS gave him a case # and 'court date' the same day they took his son.

Mango212

None of the paperwork I was given shows a case number or reference to DS11 being removed from my care. The copies the CPS agent gave me show weekly CPS contact for two months, from 10/29 through 12/29. She first alluded this likely would be turned over to the CPS office in the county we had plans to be in for the month of November.

Yesterday (the very next morning) there was no option for this. It was simply, "Your son is being removed from your care."

I was told yesterday that I would be contacted in about a week with information of the first group meeting of myself, kid, DS30 and others. Anyone who cannot be in office can call in. This is to take place in three weeks. The CPS agent said she will contact me with visitation information. I believe that was also to be given next week.

It's all very weird.

She also referenced no homeschooling paperwork being submitted since the 2016/2017 school year. DS11 was in public school that year. I wasn't about to make waves at that point. It seemed best to let God take all this. It was way too much for me to change. She was determined there was no other option and was solely focused on immediate placement of DS11 into a different home, preferably family and absolutely in-state. I was praying, pausing, taking each next right action to ensure things went smoothly.

My concern is protecting DS11 from my FOO.

DontRemember

I had to check the accronym sticky to see what FOO meant.. That's exactly who turned my guy in and where his child is currently staying. His case is basically identical to yours,except the CPS lady gave him her business card with a court date/time. I let him stay with me for a few days and went to court with him the first time(wanted to make sure he wasn't lying to me)..there they provided the exact complaint paperwork showing every complaint/ complainant against him. I made mention of me having to go through this process to a couple people I talk to on here via PM.

I'll give you the same advice I gave him; Get your own place to live(they were living with FOO). Secure stable/provable income(he had this,but didn't spend it on his child as he should have IMO) and make solid plans(paper trail) on how/where the child will recieve proper/accredited education. The last is where he really has an issue due to his sons dissabilities,but still..there's programs his kid should have been actively attendening. I actually parted ways with him as far as business goes,because of some of the stuff that I read in his CPS papers..as I,personaly, believe is son is waaayyy better off with the family.

That's just me and my recent experience with the CPS thing..

Best wishes to all involved.

dandylion

Mango.….I still remember how awful I felt, during that time that my ex was trying to drag me through hell. Even though I knew that the accusations were frivolous and baseless. Attacking one's sense of motherhood cuts very, very deep.... That weekend, after I received the letter on late Friday afternoon...until the next Monday, I remember as the worst....not knowing, for sure, the Who? Why?....was the worst.
What I found the most helpful, as this went on, was those who really knew me, as a mother, and their reassurance that it was probably my ex...who was motivated to "smear" me and to hurt me.
Fortunately, lots of people did know me....as you seem to have lots of people who know you, also.


Believe me, I understand how you feel...those waves of anxiety.
I think, that having a schedule of purposefull, constructive efforts to support your "side" can keep your bolstered.

Making a list of your support people could be a good place to start...those who know you...and have witnessed your relationship with your son, and the great activities that you do, together.
The dv counselors that you have talked with...
Your employers...
Any medical records/and, any medical contacts...doctors, clinics, etc.

Your support is so essential, I think, for relieving the natural anxiety that you are feeling.....

Included in this, is legal counsel and support...have you made contact with anyone, yet? If not...continue to ask the dv people for help in this area (the door that squeaks the loudest, gets the most oil)….
Do you have any contact with others who do home schooling?....if so, maybe they can share their experience with you.....
"Don't Remember" gave some good advice, I think...even if the situations are some different....
lol...the "System" seems to looove paper records. Keep, create, and save paper like a "hoarder".....

I know that this feels awful, right now...but, remember that this, too, shall pass....
Your son knows that you love him, unfailingly...and that is the most important thing....

Mango212

Thank you, dandy!

As I clean today and leave the ranch for 2018, many good things inside me are being worked out also. I'm pausing often to meditate, pray, breathe deeply and allow natural balancing of mind, body and spirit.

Allowing next right action to guide me.

DS11 is with his big bro & family. It's Halloween. Life is good.

I keep seeing God's hand all over this and I trust this will be worked out in His timing.

My concerns are known. My support team is coming together. All is well.

This sucks!! And all is well. Another oxymoron. There are many in life.

Sasha1972

I'm sorry you weren't given more options - but glad that you are comfortable with the arrangement for your son to live with his brother. I hope you will be able to be together with him soon.

theuncertainty

Sending hugs, Mango, and offering support. Everything you described about your travels w DS was what I'd wanted to do for DS and I. It sounds like a wonderful way to learn.