Update...signs of malnutrition
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Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 89
Update...signs of malnutrition
Well its been a long time since I've posted. Still reading every week. Divorce has been final for over a yr....left two years ago. I have found peace and calm in my life leaving a spiraling cheating alcoholic. Financially stable and trying to be the best father possible. One hospital visit .....and 5 days in rehab now she has been going to AA consistently (supposively). I keep my distance and keep our conversations strictly regarding our child. It truly is sad to watch what addiction can do to someone. There are times of calm and polite....there are times of anger and ridiculous off the wall comments. I ignore the drama ..if it isnt constructive the convo ends.
The question I had for everyone is in regards to malnutrition. There was an extreme weight loss at the end of our marriage (drinking was heaviest) I would say she weighs under 100lbs normally 135. It could possibly be a cooccuring eating disorder but there is no way to know. The times I see her it seems like muscle atrophy....no tone... caved in areas on her arms and legs. My gut tells me drinking is still happening.....and this may be the cause. The combo of high blood pressure and malnutrition scares me for her ,her family and our child. Has anyone else experienced this or has any advice? I know this is out of my control but I'm trying to prepare myself for what this could be. When I left she was borderline alcohol hepatitis with elevated enzyme levels.
The question I had for everyone is in regards to malnutrition. There was an extreme weight loss at the end of our marriage (drinking was heaviest) I would say she weighs under 100lbs normally 135. It could possibly be a cooccuring eating disorder but there is no way to know. The times I see her it seems like muscle atrophy....no tone... caved in areas on her arms and legs. My gut tells me drinking is still happening.....and this may be the cause. The combo of high blood pressure and malnutrition scares me for her ,her family and our child. Has anyone else experienced this or has any advice? I know this is out of my control but I'm trying to prepare myself for what this could be. When I left she was borderline alcohol hepatitis with elevated enzyme levels.
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Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 4,036
I know this is out of my control but I'm trying to prepare myself for what this could be.
With self-healing and taking things one day at a time, we become strong enough to handle whatever comes, good and difficult situations of any kind.
Example:
Today kid and I played a new game. We laughed. We had fun. We embraced life whole-heartedly.
In this we are becoming resilient and able to handle stresses or difficulties as they happen.
Do you have support for your own recovery from the effects of your x's alcoholism & addiction?
With self-healing and taking things one day at a time, we become strong enough to handle whatever comes, good and difficult situations of any kind.
Example:
Today kid and I played a new game. We laughed. We had fun. We embraced life whole-heartedly.
In this we are becoming resilient and able to handle stresses or difficulties as they happen.
Do you have support for your own recovery from the effects of your x's alcoholism & addiction?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 89
Yes .... I have good friends and family around me. They have helped me thru the ordeal these past few years. So has the education on this forum. I'm just wondering if anyone else has seen these aspects of alcoholism. I'm not trying to fix them. I have a few friends that have several alcoholics in their family....his word of advice has been....weight gain and humbleness are both signs of good recovery.
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 2,163
When a woman is pregnant, and if she does not maintain a healthy diet, the human body will will take necessary nutrient from the woman’s body and distribute to the fetus. This is how young women experience bone loss, muscle loss, tooth loss, hair and nail loss... skin problems.
Same principle applies to excessive alcohol intake.
Excessive drinking depletes the body of nutrient, regardless if you are male or female. The human body will use up its resources, it will take necessary nutrient from the bones In Order to survive. This can explain how people end up with bad teeth/ no teeth, broken bones, spinal ailments, and bad skin, etc....
The body is screaming this isn’t working, this isn’t healthy, and yet theycontinue, to drink. And it can even take their brain , probably one of the saddest thing I have ever witnessed, once healthy, normal individuals, now living in a wet brain state.
Same principle applies to excessive alcohol intake.
Excessive drinking depletes the body of nutrient, regardless if you are male or female. The human body will use up its resources, it will take necessary nutrient from the bones In Order to survive. This can explain how people end up with bad teeth/ no teeth, broken bones, spinal ailments, and bad skin, etc....
The body is screaming this isn’t working, this isn’t healthy, and yet theycontinue, to drink. And it can even take their brain , probably one of the saddest thing I have ever witnessed, once healthy, normal individuals, now living in a wet brain state.
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Join Date: Dec 2008
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When my stepson was hospitalized for the first time to detox (family intervened), his arms and legs were sticks. I don't know if this is happening to your ex, but here is how my stepson's condition was explained to us at the time.
My stepson mostly drank--didn't really eat because it just interfered with the drinking and because his stomach couldn't take the food anymore. In order to obtain some sort of fuel to survive, the body begins to use muscle tissue for fuel--to sustain major functions. Therefore, his muscles had begun to waste away. Horrific, really, to see him like that.
I'm sorry to read this about your ex, and I really hope she will start turn things around!
My stepson mostly drank--didn't really eat because it just interfered with the drinking and because his stomach couldn't take the food anymore. In order to obtain some sort of fuel to survive, the body begins to use muscle tissue for fuel--to sustain major functions. Therefore, his muscles had begun to waste away. Horrific, really, to see him like that.
I'm sorry to read this about your ex, and I really hope she will start turn things around!
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Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 184
Sam, I began to notice the weight loss with my ex last spring. By the time he was removed from the house, I would guess he was down 35-40 pounds. When I saw him in court over the summer, he was down even more and his pants, obviously about five sizes too big, were scrunched up and being held on by a belt. His shirt was no longer filled out and hung off of him with the sleeves coming down over the backs of his hands. Others who saw him around that time guessed he was down at least 50 pounds—and he was not a big guy to begin with.
He was drinking and not eating. That’s probably what your ex is doing as well. You’re right that you can’t control it and as far as your child, being a good dad is the best thing you can do to help her get through it.
Best to you.
He was drinking and not eating. That’s probably what your ex is doing as well. You’re right that you can’t control it and as far as your child, being a good dad is the best thing you can do to help her get through it.
Best to you.
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Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Southern US
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It does sound as if she's not eating. This could be due to both the alcohol intake AND the stress of a divorce. I went from a normal weight of 135 lbs down to 118 lbs. years ago when I divorced my ex.
Hopefully with the recent hospital visit and her (supposed) consistent AA meetings she will begin to resume eating...but you are wise to have tempered expectations.
Hopefully with the recent hospital visit and her (supposed) consistent AA meetings she will begin to resume eating...but you are wise to have tempered expectations.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
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Very thoughtful post! Just to address your question, as an alcoholic now in recovery, yes. I was severely malnourished by the end of my drinking, and well before.
Iron, potassium, B12 levels...sporadic eating and often just losing all the nutrients some way or another from my body simply not being able to absorb them to more unpleasant reasons. It did take some time in sobriety to heal this stuff but with continued permanent sobriety, everything has normalized- my thyroid is the main thing we keep monitoring as I fluctuate between hyper and hypo. Also, funny enough, my sodium is too low because apparently you can drink too much of anything including water
It sounds like you do your best to stick on your side if he street as we say in AA, and it is also normal to be concerned when you see this stuff particularly since she needs to be as healthy as possible to best care for your child. You also know you can't control what she does or doesn't do.
Keep supporting yourself and child as best you can. I'd venture to say that kids (like my 16 yr old step daughter who lived with her dad then us til a few months ago and now feels comfortable at her moms ) see what the healthy parents do.
Best to you.
Iron, potassium, B12 levels...sporadic eating and often just losing all the nutrients some way or another from my body simply not being able to absorb them to more unpleasant reasons. It did take some time in sobriety to heal this stuff but with continued permanent sobriety, everything has normalized- my thyroid is the main thing we keep monitoring as I fluctuate between hyper and hypo. Also, funny enough, my sodium is too low because apparently you can drink too much of anything including water
It sounds like you do your best to stick on your side if he street as we say in AA, and it is also normal to be concerned when you see this stuff particularly since she needs to be as healthy as possible to best care for your child. You also know you can't control what she does or doesn't do.
Keep supporting yourself and child as best you can. I'd venture to say that kids (like my 16 yr old step daughter who lived with her dad then us til a few months ago and now feels comfortable at her moms ) see what the healthy parents do.
Best to you.
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