My gut instinct got ahold of me again.
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 2,163
My gut instinct got ahold of me again.
Well my baby got married this past Saturday, and needless to say it was nothing short than an over the top lavish event. ( under my breath I refer to it as the sh*tshow of the year)
I have shared with you all that my ex husband is a work alcoholic, His inability to balance work and home life was a huge contributing factor in our divorce.
The festivities began on Wednesday the 12th and continued until after brunch on the 16th.
I did not make up my mind to attend this wedding until 30 days prior. I declined the request to walking her down the aisle with her father, and I would not / could not in good conscious attend all the cocktail, dinner parties, rehearsal dinners, ( yes, their were two).
Off topic for a second, the same reoccurring thought kept running thru my head,and that being, so you ex husband sacrificed everyday life with your family, so you could arrive at today. Act like you have been ever
present in the girls daily life and deliver this ostentatious sh*tshow.
Another thing bride tends to tell fibs, sugar coat issues , tell half truths to her father. So father makes decisions on what bride has told him. I have plenty of emails to show dad exactly how bride has deceived him, but I have chosen to stay out of their relationship, even if it means I get to look like the bitch from hell, ughh..
Never did meet or speak with the grooms parents at the wedding, yes that was slightly awkward, instead I chose to wear my valid concerns for my daughter’s wellbeing as a coat of armor. It is never my intent to be cruel , or cause harm, but I will be damned if I am going to allow his unacceptable actions and life choices to make me the bad guy. I am also now sitting at my child’s wedding without my eldest daughter, and my 3 precious granddaughters, who happen to be crazy Fun, happy in love with their aunt , the bride. My oldest daughter refused to attend her baby sisters wedding, and I don’t blame her.
So now for my concern, Oh course the champagne, mimosas, wine were flowing for 5 days and nights, and I know I asked my middle daughter, and my ex husband on many occasions if the bride was drunk.? To which they would reply she had a glass or two of wine. My daughter can certainly handle a glass or two of wine. My gut instinct was screaming she is high on something. She does not smoke pot, so she must be doing pills or something else.
There is something about when that gut instinct grabs ahold of you. For me it starts with that rumble in my stomach, and before long it’s in my head, and there is nowhere to run or hide.
I realize all I can do is sit back and wait for more to be revealed, part of me wants to discuss this with her father, and ask if he saw it, but since I am already the bad guy, would probably just be viewed as trying to cause more trouble, and I am sure he would share with the bride anything I said. So I won’t be discussing anything with him.
So here I sit , my gut instinct consuming the hell out of me. Thinking what room in the house needs my immediate attention, as I need to do something with all this negative energy.
Thanks for listening, sorry to be as long winded as the preacher who married my daughter.
I have shared with you all that my ex husband is a work alcoholic, His inability to balance work and home life was a huge contributing factor in our divorce.
The festivities began on Wednesday the 12th and continued until after brunch on the 16th.
I did not make up my mind to attend this wedding until 30 days prior. I declined the request to walking her down the aisle with her father, and I would not / could not in good conscious attend all the cocktail, dinner parties, rehearsal dinners, ( yes, their were two).
Off topic for a second, the same reoccurring thought kept running thru my head,and that being, so you ex husband sacrificed everyday life with your family, so you could arrive at today. Act like you have been ever
present in the girls daily life and deliver this ostentatious sh*tshow.
Another thing bride tends to tell fibs, sugar coat issues , tell half truths to her father. So father makes decisions on what bride has told him. I have plenty of emails to show dad exactly how bride has deceived him, but I have chosen to stay out of their relationship, even if it means I get to look like the bitch from hell, ughh..
Never did meet or speak with the grooms parents at the wedding, yes that was slightly awkward, instead I chose to wear my valid concerns for my daughter’s wellbeing as a coat of armor. It is never my intent to be cruel , or cause harm, but I will be damned if I am going to allow his unacceptable actions and life choices to make me the bad guy. I am also now sitting at my child’s wedding without my eldest daughter, and my 3 precious granddaughters, who happen to be crazy Fun, happy in love with their aunt , the bride. My oldest daughter refused to attend her baby sisters wedding, and I don’t blame her.
So now for my concern, Oh course the champagne, mimosas, wine were flowing for 5 days and nights, and I know I asked my middle daughter, and my ex husband on many occasions if the bride was drunk.? To which they would reply she had a glass or two of wine. My daughter can certainly handle a glass or two of wine. My gut instinct was screaming she is high on something. She does not smoke pot, so she must be doing pills or something else.
There is something about when that gut instinct grabs ahold of you. For me it starts with that rumble in my stomach, and before long it’s in my head, and there is nowhere to run or hide.
I realize all I can do is sit back and wait for more to be revealed, part of me wants to discuss this with her father, and ask if he saw it, but since I am already the bad guy, would probably just be viewed as trying to cause more trouble, and I am sure he would share with the bride anything I said. So I won’t be discussing anything with him.
So here I sit , my gut instinct consuming the hell out of me. Thinking what room in the house needs my immediate attention, as I need to do something with all this negative energy.
Thanks for listening, sorry to be as long winded as the preacher who married my daughter.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 5,103
Sounds like you did a really good job of detaching and staying away from any drama. I’m sure your gut instinct was correct and that’s really all that matters. You don’t need anyone else to valid that especially your ex-husband.
We trust your gut, we valid that what you saw and what you heard with your daughter was off and your gut is telling you she was high on something not just high from the event.
Put on some music and clean the heck out of something!! LOL OR turn that negative energy into something positive for yourself, go get a mani-pedi or go buy a new top or new shoes.
We trust your gut, we valid that what you saw and what you heard with your daughter was off and your gut is telling you she was high on something not just high from the event.
Put on some music and clean the heck out of something!! LOL OR turn that negative energy into something positive for yourself, go get a mani-pedi or go buy a new top or new shoes.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 224
You made me laugh out loud with, "Thanks for listening, sorry to be as long winded as the preacher who married my daughter." Sometimes being able to find the humor in things helps me heal from the pain. You should like you handled everything well, all things considered. Sour taste with her actions/festivities? Heck yes. Staying detached and in your lane? Most certainly!
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