gypsygirl

what is wrong with me? I feel like a freak. If my A gets a phone call from a 50 year old non drinking friend from work, my body gets all contorted inside and feel this disgusting unnatural jeaoulsy. Not of that person in a sexual way... just that there is a life that my A has outside of me... its always been bad when that was true in the past, and no matter what i try to reason with myself the feeling.. the physical anguish... its just THERE... not to mention everything makes me sad... even the thought of healthy seperate activities that i know are so nessasary and OK, i'm just seriously traumatised... what is going on? what is this feeling and will it ever stop?

ASpouse

The feeling sounds like major insecurity in your relationship.

JessicaNAJ

Gypsy - We spend so much time and energy trying to take care of our A's so they "appreciate" us. We already feel threatened by the time our AH's spend with their alcohol or whatever their addiction maybe, but the thought of a person moving in our our territory, our place of control - that's harder to swallow. Maybe we feel like now that person is getting the appreciation we deserve and then feel a loss of control. The only one you can control is you and your actions.

Keep the focus on you. The more you focus on you and your needs, the easier it will be to be happy no matter what your AH's is doing.